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Sometimes very hot shower works to calm body down, and sometimes I use stretch bands to get adrenaline out. I'm not afraid of dark (actually can't sleep with light), so only keep small amount of light on to help return to sleep. I'd go with more nightlights than regular lights. Just research...

@Saelben Ok that's positive you reach out, and have people around you to help. Maybe another call center would be more helpful? Skype EU call plan is about 8 euros a month. I'm sure some even offer free calls with Skype. Yea I've looked at Croatia to move to in past so I know some about...

@Saelben - You've proven to be strong in past, and just starting this thread shows that. Do you have support hot lines you can call if things get too bad? Keep them on your phone. If you have a Skype plan for worldwide calls Samaritans 24/7 NYC 1-212-673-3000, but sure they also have crisis...

@Saelben I grew up around suicide. Emotional topic for me. I was also suicidal when teenager. Decided if I did that the world would win. Brother tried, but last minute, called 911 for ambulance. He almost didn't make it. In critical care for days. Proud you made call. Stay strong, and thanks...

Also a quote for you...at one point I had posted in 3 places in apartment. “Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow.” -Mary Anne Radmacher

I think a lot about that.... You are brave here, and to make such a post. Plus you actually have your face pic on profile. That takes A LOT of courage and strength! Can you do outpatient daytime treatment program?

@Link Removed Kinda how I ended up on this forum year ago. Been at top, or near, of several different careers. Each time something happens that makes my PTSD much worse (mostly not work related.) People always assumed I had such a good life, and everything was peaceful about me. But they were...

Great thread. So relate. Can I move there? Could always add an electrical charge to barbed wire to make sure people stayed out ;) Solar power, or steam, to keep it off the grid. How about a shattered mirror that somehow still wants to hope.

Shocking and disturbing. But not unexpected since I've been told such a high number before. @Lodinn As others have said medications can be a huge factor. I remember for months I was getting so very frustrated. Sorry to be graphic, but telling psychiatrist, "I can't even ejaulate to porn on this...

That is something to look forward too. I was so afraid of therapy and opening up. Even in college an ex tried to get me to see someone. Finally I did, but was still scared as hell. So I went to a psychiatrist that also did psychotherapy long after, and some traumatic events that brought...

Not theme of thread, but disappear. Start a new life.

Watch the movie "Enough" I've watched it so many times. Not a horror movie in traditional terms. But about a feed up women. Reminds me of my mom, and extremes some people have to go to - to end abuse.

When a relative now knows to tell me day of week when on phone so I don't get upset with missing days. First time I broke down, and was beating head against a closet door...Very embarrassing. Thankfully she is a kind person. Wish more such people...

Brick from Cat on Hot Tin Roof play by Tennessee Williams

Everyone is different. I am sensitive to medicine. Hope they work for you. Just use your own judgement - even if doc wants to increase. Also, found it helpful to keep a log or journal to track changes. Evernote is great.

That happened to me first week on Lexapro. At first a "relief" my mind was quiet, then as dosage increased, and time on it. Well too numb. Became disabling literally. I won't ever go near it again. But that's just my experience, and know from experience I need to stay off SSRIs.

When you are having an awful night. Praying it wasn't another seizure while sleeping. Then start reading autonomic nervous system post by @CrowFeather , Google it. Then kinda relieved it explains so much of past year(s). But still new to all this...(not to ptds, but how the body can physically...

Cuban violin players are amazing and so soothing. I use to go sit (along with many others) in this park to listen to this one guy from restaurant across the street. Amazing.

@Heather Consider emergency medicine to get back into more control, and calm you down. One helped me to get panic attacks under control. Told to take when I felt one was setting in. It broke the cycle. I always keep one on me now. It's kinda a security blanket. Personal opinion, and experience...

@kimberly I wish I knew what to say. *big hug* if you accept.

Don't live in US anymore, and don't follow US news since it's most often overblow. Have lived in Tropics, and spent much time there. My current home. Zika is not a conspiracy to pregnant women. Most others won't be affected. Worry more about the flu, or washing your hands. But America has...

Come on...trickle down economics people. If he makes a billion think of all the money helpings others (being Very Sarcastic) from his profits.

Also agree as an American who has lived outside the U.S. This doesn't represent average Americans. Grateful I don't get US News right now since I am outside country, I hate logging into Facebook since it's become so political with some relatives. I even messaged one, telling her I loved her...

@Kimberley While my brother is not primary cause of my problems. When I was kid I approached my parents, because I wanted to put an "External Door Lock" on bedroom to keep my bother out. Panic room - since when he lost control it was dangerous. He has serious mental health condition. They...

I use to work in sales, then sales management. Try not to worry. While I would "never" put up a board with people's names, nor do I think companies I worked for would allow such a practice. It's very tiring for employees to management. Maybe this just isn't right company for you. Use it to gain...