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That I am actually neither stupid nor lazy. I was convinced the people who told me were right. They were so many.

I tend to think in different styles in different moods/states. This is a source of great confusion for those who know me well. Somedays I can be a good sport for a philosophical discussion, the next I honest to god dont understand what is being said, even though its not more difficult or...

Thank you for long post and, dunno, explanation? of @FridayJones post, @Kefira. I feel very different from how I felt 8 hours ago. Dont even know what happened, I just read the and -BOOM- explosion. Racing heart, sweating, the whole lot. I dont usually have rage issues, but with my sleep...

I am uncomfortable with hugging all but the very nearest to me. I remember the dread and terror when it became fashionable to hug everyone when I was younger. I much preferred the "Hi" with a waggling hand. After a few years of this the constant exposure made me relax about it. Nowadays that...

Duly noted. Thanks, if a bit unfair. That was not about what I want to hear This is fantastic food for thought and send me deep down the rabbit hole. Comparing the shoulds with the wants I think I found that the roots of it. Its shildhood neglect, abuse and abondment. Then emotional abuse...

This pisses me of greatly. I did not write this thread, during which I cried because it is a very painfull subject matter to me, to get laughed at and my issues ridiculed. For that I can jump into my time machine and relieve the first 20 years of my life. Why the hell do you feel the need...

I really dont understand how "should statements" are distorted thinking. Everyone I know uses these. I got brought up with hearing should statements a million times a day. School was should statements, home was should statements, and everything else even more so. Everything is "should" or...

:roflmao:

Hello and welcome. A horrible event like that fits the criterias for PTSD and your symptoms also fit, so yeah, it could very well be PTSD. Might be something else. It is important that you go on the search for professionell help with this. Only there can you get the help and the diagnosis you...

I cant imagine what it must have been like for you, even though you painted vivid image. I hope the terror will fade.

@void I dont think so. When i am not overly numb I can be very emotional and empathetic and I like metaphorical stuff and am pretty good with language. My inflection is not flat at all and I can read people like books. That rules it out pretty much I think. I feel like all my bases are covered...

Yes I did that in the past. Now I am happier and have fulfilling things to fill my time with. That was the big difference for me. I spent to feel some fun and happiness. I have gotten back to my hobbies, and shopping sprees dont happen anymore.

Dont abuse alcohol. I was not a physical alcoholic, but was very much on the way to becoming one. My mind needed months to get over the long term consequences. Yes, frequent drinking quickly makes long termish impacts on the mood and brain. Try to work very, very hard on enjoying the things you...

I salute your bravery! I hope you realize how strong and brave that was, and that this strength is you yourself, and you will always have it. When you started this you said and still you did. You are fighting the good fight and it seems you are slowly winning. I feel this way about even...

I can be so sensitive to sound and light, my partner once suggested I need to check if I am autistic. That was before I knew about PTSD. So, a very very sturdy YES to the question. It can be quite hellish, but there are ways and tricks to manage it.

Cooking can be a great, great date activity. 2nd date and onwards I would say.People laugh at and laugh at me when I suggest it, but once they try they see the light. :roflmao:

I dont know if that is in any way applicable to you. I am in the same boat as you, meaning crying alot, but it feels very healthy to me. I have been so terribly numb for the last third of my life. I needed to drink and drink to feel even a bit of emotion, unless we are talking anger. Anger was...

I am using nutrilent (a brand of soylent available in europe) for over a month now and I dont think I will ever go back. Most days I use it for breakfast and dinner, and for lunch I cook something healthy. Every now and then I am not in the mood for cooking and it is another nutrilent. There...

Hello! Somebody once explained this to me in way better words, but I dont remember them, just the sentiment. It was about love, finding a partner to love and be loved by and my coming out was still fresh. The person was extremely mathematical and logical in thinking, and never gave nor...

which, funnily enough, is of course their excuse to not having to learn how the world really works, outside their dreamy fairyland. Eugh. Stuff like this hurts, especially when they are otherwise decent people. A variation: Lost my best friend. Smart guy. Total inability to accept anything that...

@Whispering_Truth whispers the truth.

But crotchet is such great, great fun! I need to pick it up again. Im not even joking. :roflmao: Here is the way I see it: Years and years and years of very regular, big doses of alcohol transforms people into rage monster. They bounce and bounce between agressive depression and sad depression...

Oh dear! Oh man. :( I have very little constructive ideas, but I want to wholeheartedly express my sympathie. That is an awful, awful situation you are in. Abused people often get into abusive relationsship. My thinking is, the abusers see who is already down, so can be easily kicked again...

Wow, yeah, I know the type. Grumpy old f*cks, aggressive "discussion" techniques, only ever negative right? Drinking A LOT. This is honest to god a total copy of the behaviour of my partner's father. He got cancer, treatment went well, and now drinks and smokes less. His behaviour cleared...

May I ask what they do/say?