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Its like nothing exists anymore i try each day(which I know you all know what that means) the constant fight body cant take anymore it makes me physically ill( body pains, stomach issues, headaches etc) the self harm has gone down hill today but want to keep doing it :/. I know its so wrong to...

Lol I'll sleep and just it's not sleep I wake up drenched in sweat trust me I'm not choosing to not get proper sleep. I still grind teeth when sleeping

Don't be so many people drink. Drink more alcohol then water ha I am one of them

All can say is losing it don't know what to trust nothing seems real. Scared. I'm here but not. Puts me in destruct mode. SH. Don't sleep properly function

Kudos for telling huge step. Regardless how you did it and you did come clean :) xo

Because a lot of childhood trauma was dealing with stuff on own and being minimal or i called dramatic pathetic. I guess i dont feel like im really worth anyone's time. Others come first. Speaking up in life doesnt seem to make a difference

Yes because they don't listen and when they don't listen or do jobs properly it leads to almost dying. And i get they make mistakes are human yet.... I'm glad it helped You ? Idk... My verbal voice sucks and trusting people sucks

So went to Drs today appt 815am was hell going sat there till 850am anxiety was getting worse a lot of people noises etc... I never got called back or anything even though checked in with person. I ended up just leaving because started to feel anxoety attack. Im so over it all! Took everything...

I know I should be doing better job taking care of self but its hard to care enough to not let self completely deteriorate.

True. How do I do that there is so much anxiety fear

Idk I wish it were that simple ?

Yea I guess nurses are ok.

Hi all So don't trust in this case Drs. But body is screaming something is wrong. Im trying to care enough to get self to get help and not just try to suck it up/ deal but getting help doesn't seem to be happening despite how horrible i physically feel etc

This is the third one. The first one was awesome but for whatever reason she is on diff team and i can't see her

That's what I thought but not sure if can trust brain. And I don't have resources ton see trauma therapist

No just city mental health therapist

Therapist suggested DBT yet she doesn't know it....is that professional? Also I know things could be worse.....and that I'm lucky I don't have dementia etc but is it normal for therapist to compare to other clients? She also gets frustrated because I don't communicate well in person...so...

I'm so sorry. Its funny you say this as I've been Thinking therapist have generic phrases out of books cliches. And it def doesn't help. As for intervention ive never had one so cant speak on it... :/

Same. I hate that I'm breaking I know people say its choice but it Doesn't feel like one. ?

I do appreciate all the suggestions and sharing.

I fear outside so much. Noises smells are too much. People stand too close. Its major sensory overload get to point where detach that things don't even seem really. Sometimes go into anxiety attack have to go home :/. Bur thank you for veing open about what you do

Hope is like a never ending trick, you can have hope for things that you know will never happen. when there is one thing that gets you through the abuse and neglect as kid you prayed for it every day,, you still hope and wish for it but it will NEVER happen. i hate that some have to fight so...

Your awesome congrats very proud of you. its confusing part of me is barely hanging on hence trying to reach out, other part is done and my actions show. came across a interesting poem why am i alive . its like as rape advocate put it instinct is too live, but unfortunately its very much...

Hate that so many people have been hurt thread put me into tears. This world as beautiful as it can be (people say) its also he'll. Im sorry all much love to every single one of you <3 Hell yea and when society portrays arousal etc as good makes you feel worse that body reacts/reacted in that way

I'd focus on coding/ software engineer if brain worked properly. Have BS in computer science havent been able to use it :/ which makes me feel even worse. But i def understand what your saying and very much admire what you have done and proud of you. I mean everyone on here is amazing in dumb...