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@Meadowsweet - Perhaps I should have specified that this philosophy really only applies to relationships with a significant other. It's that 50/50, give-and-take, etc that means even a relationship with someone extremely selfish/abusive is not necessarily one where either could consider...

"We all see the world through tinted eyes" comes to my mind. Much as I am certain we all try, it can be very very difficult to truly put ourselves in another person's shoes and see their "tinted" version of the world. Even harder is removing our tint to see the world the way it really is. I...

The fact that the depression is hitting during periods of separation from your partner and goes away when you're with him makes me think you might be struggling with a fear of abandonment?

Criminology is fascinating, too! :D I think any time we see people act in ways different from the norm, we find ourselves asking - why? What were they thinking? How did they justify this behavior? What combination of biology, environmental factors, circumstances, and choice led to this outcome...

Not a master, but a do a lot of reading on the brain. I study Animal Behavior and have an avid interest in autism and similar things related to neuroscience, so I know what my dad would call "enough to be dangerous". So, I try to be careful not to be "dangerous" with my knowledge. Try not to...

I do think our personalities can make us more succeptible to different things. You look at the root cause of something like PTSD and it all boils down to damage to the brain. Well our thoughts/feelings/hormones/etc that help determine our personality traits also all come from the brain, and...

@tillybee Something else that might be helpful in overcoming that overwhelming feeling is just remembering that all this terminology is something the doctors/psychiatrists use in pinpointing exactly your medical condition. It is not to describe/define you, but rather a diagnosis concerning your...

Hmmm... "pulled away emotionally" does put your explanation in a bit of a different light than I was originally reading. Have you attempted asking her, in a non-threatening way, why she is sharing less with you emotionally? And when I say in a non-threatening way, I mean being aware of your...

Raekai, Space is healthy! :) I know that can be hard when you seem to be faced with a sudden wall, but relationships are healthier when you are both able to have time to yourselves, to be yourselves. It also gives you both time to think about how you meld into each other's lives when you are...

Sounds like you've been facing one trauma after another your whole life and the only way you were able to get through it was to numb yourself to it all. Now that you aren't facing any more trauma's, your defenses have come down and it's all rushing forward. One way or another, we all have to...

It is a little difficult for me to relate to a sudden onset of PTSD years after the experienced trauma... I imagine though that facing it would still be at least in some ways similar to my own experience, so I share some of that here for you- My PTSD stems from a life-threatening abusive...

I agree with a lot that was said here and want to offer another possible perspective- The abuse you witnessed at home was not directed toward you. Your exposure to it made you aware of the extremes people are capable of when angry and irrational, but you were an outsider looking in and felt as...

Sorry to hear about your struggle. One thing you may not know about pornography is that it is very addictive. It is possible that your significant other truly wants to give it up, but is having difficulty doing so. It is literally like a drug, triggering hormonal responses that require him to...

Just a little legal advice I haven't seen shared here yet- If there is any concern about possible exposure to this cousin between now and the time charges are handled, you could advice your friend to get a restraining order. This will also serve to support her case that she is doing all in her...

Forgive me if I'm totally off the mark here- I'm probably missing a lot of context since I haven't read any of your previous posts concerning this relationship, but (just from what I've read here) it looks to me like you have difficulty being sensetive to her emotional needs and that is the...

Lost- You don't have to answer here, just consider this input and answer these questions for yourself, and hopefully this will help: What, exactly, is causing you to feel panicky? When you start getting that shortness of breath, that "I need to get out of here" feeling, what is it you are...

@soulsearcher, I've actually been feeling almost exactly how you've described your feelings the past few weeks. Suicidal thoughts have even been sneaking in - haven't had those since I was actually experiencing my trauma. I haven't openly recognized those thoughts or admitted to anyone until...

Life is pain. We either succumb to it or learn from it and become stronger people. Learning from our pains and sorrows can give them meaning and our life a purpose. I am sorry for your loss, for the ending of a relationship is a loss not much different than the death of a loved one. You will...

I think this is a classic response from anyone who feels misunderstood. I know you recognized in your response to me that this can come from those without PTSD, but I can't help but find your insistence on calling this a "classic response" a way of seeking a crutch- like you want to blame her...

Even people without PTSD will use the "you don't know me at all" line. Think about it from your own side - when would you say that to someone? I know I've said/felt this when there have been situations with people close to me whom I expected to understand my perspective, and they did not. The...

@Barconian - I agree that confidence helps us relax more, but I personally don't quite see how self-respect can equal confidence. I have a lot of respect for myself and those around me, but I still lack confidence in certain situations and/or environments. That lack of confidence doesn't have...

Similar issue for me - I've been spending a lot of time working out at my local gym. It's been a great way for me to build my confidence in myself by getting back in shape, naturally raising my dopamine levels, and trying to rebuild my ability to feel safe around men. However, there are days...

Dreams are a creation, yes, BUT... they are a creation from our subconscious- the house for our memories and feelings. It is not so much something that we want or desire but a reflection of our current state of emotional health. This makes them a great tool for discussing in therapy. My worst...

My PTSD is minor compared to most - so much so I almost have a hard time saying I have PTSD until something comes up that really makes my symptoms spike. For the most part, I handle it just fine. The majority of my issues with it are "behind-the-scenes" type things that I handle on my own. So...

Dreams take the thoughts, memories, feelings, and concerns that our brains are focusing most of their time and energy on and combine them into something that can reveal things we may not consciously realize are a "big deal" at the time. Sometimes the connections and meanings are obvious, but...