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Thanks for your reply, @Samantha_38. School has always been a kind of refuge for me. Growing up, it was a good escape from my tumultuous home life, and my school work was a good distraction from everything else that was going on. It's different now that I'm an adult and I'm safe, but I...

I feel like I don't get asked this enough, so thanks for putting it out there, @fly away home. Right now I am actually not OK. I've been battling suicidal thoughts and self-harm urges for a while, and right now they are especially strong. I'm struggling to stay grounded and feel safe. I'm...

I can't take antidepressants as they cause me to become quite suicidal. They scare me. That said, I have found the antipsychotic medication I am currently on to be quite helpful in managing my depression. I do understand not wanting to take prescription medications, though. For me, the best...

Thanks for your replies, @KwanYingirl, @Ghostybear73, @Solara, @joeylittle, and @desiderata310. It's good to know that others have been successful in completing their degrees while dealing with PTSD. Classes can definitely serve as a distraction from the intrusive thoughts, anxiety, and...

This thread is making me feel less alone. I've been on a kind of dating hiatus for a long time now and, in my early thirties, I too am feeling like the idea of having a solid relationship and having a family of my own may not be in the cards for me. I want to try and date anyhow, because as...

Thanks for your reply, @Noah. Actually, I'm in a counseling program. You're right that the sandards/rules are different from other areas of study in that most people in the program are sensitive to mental health issues and the fact that many people going into the field have their own struggles...

I'm in a tough spot and could really use some support right now. Classes just started, work is picking up, and I'm set to start an internship in the near future. It all feels like too much too fast. I am anxious and overwhelmed and my twice weekly appointments with my therapist (with some...

Thanks, everyone, for the warm welcome! I'm so happy to have found this forum. @greenleaf, love what you said about passerine birds. Beautiful. Once again, thank you all!

@Hashi, this thread is so interesting to me. I wonder if you have experimented with the sand tray therapy since posting? I'm all about expressive therapies. I have done a lot of art therapy (and some play therapy - sand tray) over the years and it has been so helpful. At first I was really...

I do a lot of art in my own therapy work, and I am studying to become an Expressive Therapist so this is right up my ally! My therapist is actually a Social Worker by training, but he does incorporate art into our work together. Sometimes I draw as I speak or draw because I cannot speak during...

I am actually working on a graduate degree in Expressive Therapies, which incorporates visual art as well as drama, music, dance, writing and play into therapy. I got into the field because the arts have been critical in helping me heal and I have had a lot of experience using it in my own...

Are you at all familiar with trauma sensitive yoga? This has been a saving grace for me in dealing with body memories, which I am all too familiar with, over the last year or so. I have been fortunate enough to have found a few wonderful trauma sensitive yoga teachers who offer classes and...

Dissociation for me began when I was very young, but, like others, I didn't know what it was until I was an adult. The experience of it also has changed with age. Though there are very large chunks of time that are missing in my memory of childhood because I had "gone away", I do remember...

Sounds like dissociation and something that I was just talking to my therapist about today. During our session the other day, I was dissociating and could not make out the words he was saying as he was trying to talk me through it. At one point I was unresponsive. I couldn't even hear him. I...

I suffer from nightmares that I have trouble waking up from, too. Medication has helped some, but I still get them. Sometimes I wake up in a flashback and get confused about where I am and whether I'm still dreaming or not. I have noticed, however, that the duration and severity of my...

Wow, this is a really long and really awesome thread. I love talking about my pets; a big, sweet, goofy three-legged dog and a very cuddly cat. I have had them both for a very long time and consider them "service" animals. In fact, I bring my dog to therapy with me twice a week, and even my...

I was just talking about this with my therapist today. He told me that there was nothing he could do to get me out of a flashback. This was in response to me saying how distressed I was when I was having flashbacks in his presence and he just sat there talking me through it (not helpful as I...

I can't really add anything that hasn't already been said, but I did want to chime in and say that I agree with those who say that your therapist needs to put the breakers on. In dealing with trauma, things need to move slow. I've been with my therapist for two years (I've seen other...

Thank you, everybody, for your replies. The support is much appreciated, and needed. To answer your question, Bookoffee, I don't meditate in the traditional sense, as I find it only makes me dissociate. Sometimes I even find deep breathing exercises triggering. Thanks, though, for your...

I have been lurking on this site for a while and have found it quite helpful, but am only now am working up the courage to write my first post. I, like many people on this site, suffer from severe, complex PTSD, which stems from early childhood sexual abuse, abandonment, a violent sexual...