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Thanks for this, @EveHarrington! I think you have a very valid point. Sometimes I'm too in the middle of my story to see that outside perspective. It actually is very messed up! I agree with you fervently! I was hesitant to bring it up, even...but I'm really glad I did. The reality is you guys...

It's crazy sometimes to think about, isn't it? I mean, don't get me wrong...it would be nice! But I don't really want anyone else. So in the consideration of full disclosure and possibility of TMI, I did buy a set of Yoni Eggs with the Amazon certificate he gave me for Christmas. So, whether he...

Thank you for sharing that. It may sound crazy, but I'm glad I'm not alone in not wanting to. Everyone makes me feel like I'm crazy for not wanting to date and like there's something wrong with me for it. We've been together just over 8.5, so no where near as long as you, but certainly long...

That's really beautiful. I'm really trying to do that right now myself. I am focusing on me, and even though we talk, I haven't been "pushing" for anything. If he doesn't want to talk, we don't. If he wants to be alone, he is. I think I'm going to have to maybe lean back even a little further...

Hi @Mytime! I was thinking about you today! How are you my friend? Thank you for your support! Of course, I'm hopeful he comes back, but this is so different with being in therapy. It's getting so that I don't know what to do anymore. I know you understand.

......and he just went to the pharmacy and bought my scripts and delivered them to me. He stayed only a second because he has a horrible cold. So yet another reason this was the the best decision! How sweet of him though, right? Two little bottles of drops was $100 USD because they messed up...

Thank you for your perspective! I think this is very well said! I do feel as though we both managed to be honored by doing it this way. I agree with you that it was good for me to let him know his decisions have consequences to more than just him. Ultimately, he's a good man and he is...

It's funny you say this, because I think that this is very much what is going on lately. That he's really embracing learning to say no. The funny thing is, that most of the time, i'm I'm actually quite glad to receive his "no" because of that very reason. I think it's a great part of his...

You are always so sweet and kind, I actually find it hard to believe you woukd be "immature". I also have those moments though, so I get it! My surgery went well. I still have a patch and shield, so I'm not sure how I'm seeing from that eye, but it shouldn't have been affected. It was so...

Very good point! I found out a few other things that led to this so I'm in a pretty good place with it. My sister took me. It went fairly well. It hurts, but not too bad. Even with the anesthetic to sedate me, I had to work hard on staying calm. But I did it! Thank you so much for your...

Thanks for taking the time to reply to me...I appreciate your kindness. I have been surprised by him with these last few medical things because in the past, he's always been there for me. This is new since he started his therapy and has been in what is almost a majorly depressive state. His 12...

I don't know why I set myself up to be hurt sometimes. Things have been going better between us. He came over on Christmas before work, and we had our little family's Christmas on New Year's day. It was really nice. I even had his son all last weekend. (So I saw him too for a few minutes every...

You're my spirit animal today! Hugs!

So, I have to go in to have a lump removed from my eye to have a biopsy done on it tomorrow. I asked K to take me, because I'm petrified. He told me Friday he'd think about it and let me know. I told myself I'd be okay with either answer. Clearly since I'm writing, I was lying to myself...

Welcome to the forum. I can relate, unfortunately. It's not an easy life to live on either side of the coin. Much of what you had to say is similar to what I've gone through. I have been looking "in" for answers a lot lately. One of the things I'm working on is how to make myself more capable of...

I'm glad it's resonating, dear! Of course you can steal away. It could be. I know that right now he's super focused on controlling anything he can and through "addictions". I know that he's been obsessed with cleaning, working an obnoxious amount of overtime, I'm pretty sure he's drinking...

I know for me, he does offer essentially everything he has. Things could be so much easier if he would stop trying to manage me and worried more about managing himself. He overthinks/ complicates everything by doing that. He doesn't like to follow his own "rules". I've heard a lot on here, that...

Happy New Year! No matter what, things change...onward and upward.

There is some progress, the type most people on here would almost give anything for...but of course, my impatient butt is TIRED. It's so much slower than normal. But he's doing the work. He's going to his EMDR every week. He's been faithful to it. He's trying so hard. I see it. He even is...

I can envision you doing it too!

I'm glad you're going to go see someone. It's soooooo difficult. My fella is reaching out more, but dang, it's rough to see him like this. We've been doing this for almost 9 years....it's still tough. Keep one hand on that oxygen mask, and breathe deep!

To you too! Hugs!

This really explains a LOT!

Most of your "babbling" does!

Yeah, this sounds about tghe same as him, I think. But we haven't gone anywhere... no matter how hard he tries to push me. I think he's maybe afraid I'll see "the real him" and bolt, so he tries to beat me to the punch. But yep....still here, still loving him just as he is...whether he'll be...