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I dont think its possible to heal while beating verbally and emotionally battered. It just doesnt work in my experience. Once I seperated myself from the toxicity, and got to place I felt safe, then the healing began. Its hard, I dont know that you have to make it forever but I think you...

Oh they were no doubt true feelings that were bottled up. I definitly couldnt have expressed myself so well sober. I just wasnt intending to share those feelings with that person just yet for other reasons. To late though, whiskey did the talking. So I guess my point is negligible Snow...

Could Alcohol have been a factor in this episode? Just asking, just this past weekend I was having a meltdown, drank way to much to cope, and in that process sent a hateful hateful email. The next day i opened my email, I was like OH Sh!t!!!! I had no recollection of what I had done...

I've had had multiple traumas and have been doing EMDR for right at year on a weekly or bi weekly basis. Im still peeling layers of this trauma off and processing things. I hope at some point there is an end but at this point, im still finding major stuff to work on after probably 45...

Thanks for all the input. I know I don't want to be hard and emotionless like that. I like being a caring person, I like being a decent human. PTSD has taken this 6'4" 275 pound muscled up man to his knees like nothing else ever has. I'm just so tired of exposing my damaged heart and self to...

Ok, Logically I know this isnt true but cant shake the shame of being weak. I went to see the new movie "Lone Survivor" yesterday. I was a big fan of the book and just amazed at the toughness and resilience of these men. Now I understand these mean are the highest trained warriors there...

If I really get something uncovered doing EMDR, I can pretty well bet on having 2-3 rough days afterwards, I get a headache later that day and have very vivid dreams for a few nights as well.

I have really been struggling through this healing process to determine what I actually believe in the spritual sense. I was raised in a stict christian home, led the first 30 years of my life striving to be a good christian, served in all manners of the church including a deacon but as the...

Im sorry you deal with this to but glad im not alone in this. Very cute dog by the way. Sadness and Helplessness are very much the emotions I feel. I can go from feeling like Im making progress to just feeling so overwhelmed there is no hope. On the nightmares, i know I have them but...

Thanks for the response D. It just comes on like a flood. I feel totally out of control and the physical and emotions all just hit at once. I feel totally panicked for a minute or two and then the dissociation seems to hit. I just sort of shut down. I feel like I know at some cognitive...

I often will get triggered by some event, word, image, etc. I don't really have any memories, I don't get any visual, auditory or an other sensations. I usually just have body memory type symptoms. I feel like I'm being physically crushed, I get the shakes, and then dissociate. I have a...

I get this constantly. Everytime I get around my immediate family, someone slips or says something about conversations and family meetings that are being had to discuss me. Most of the time this involves conversations between my abusive ex and my siblings and parents. Kind of feels like a...

I have often wondered this same thing. I dont ever remember my dreams when I wake up but when I do wake up im absolutely exhausted and blankets are usually kicked all over the place. I live alone so dont have anyone to tell me what I do when sleeping except my dog and that poor guy has no...

Sorry DMerish. In my state its typically split 50/50 of current assets. My has filed a petition that because Im competely at fault for ruining the marriage, she is entitiled to most of the assets. Im trying to document a defense to prove I was not completely at fault and that I was in...

Hello All, been reading the website for a long long time but haven't ever posted. To give a little background, I was in a verbally/emotionally (some isolated physical) abusive marriage for 16 years. I stuck it out as long as I could due to my religious background and family pressure. I...