Search results

I'm ONLY vilified currently unfortunately, I've mentioned it to my SO yesterday so we'll see if that changes anything but for the past few months I have been the target of plenty of vilification, I don't open up, I don't show her I love her, I don't find her attractive, I worry too much and make...

Very similar, only big difference is how long I've known my partner. Same for the family too, they don't support her and it's so unfair on her, it has been just me and that's perhaps why I've not handled it as best as I might, if more people were involved I'd have had more time to read up etc...

Well, we spoke today, granted it almost didn't happen. The crux is, she feels betrayed by me from an incident last year. Without going into much details (I respect her privacy), something happened specifically related to her past trauma and I encouraged her to ask for help from people I assumed...

Oh yes, you're going to learn you literally can't do anything right. I worry too much, but I also don't show her I love her. I'm too stressed and it makes her stressed, but I also look like I don't care. You're not dealing with the rational, logical, part of her right now, you're going to find...

Sorry to hear you're both going through this. My SO (dunno how long it will last, something you may need to accept yourself) has withdrawn into a PTSD spiral herself, she has become hyper critical, verbally aggressive, withdraws in on herself a lot etc, it's all quite common in PTSD and there's...

@ldj thanks for the advice, in the end she avoided it and just kept saying not to worry. I'm honestly at my wits end here, I give her space (and now get impression she took offence to it), I try to talk, nothing seems to work. I've basically told her I was giving her some space not ignoring her...

Well... unexpectedly she got in touch asking to talk today, so that'll happen later. I am nervous :(

Well, it's the start if day three of no contact (I assume anyway, not sure why she'd suddenly change today even if she is back at halls). I've come down with a virus so I am very mindful that my low mood has a very natural explanation anyway over an emotional one. Still not sure how I feel or...

Entirely possible tbh, my (for now) SO has been hyper critical of me since entering her PTSD spiral, when I get over the hurt it causes I've often felt like perhaps the fact she is getting criticised left and right and by herself too it's a way of raising her own self-esteem to say "yeah well...

I understand you pain, I honestly do. But this is coming from a supporter who is, it's not unreasonable to assume, may end up being on the receiving end of a relationship termination in the near future. There's not a chance in hell that if she breaks up with me and dumps me that I will give...

You'd assume so, but me and my SO who haven't officially broken up are in this bizarre place of "are we aren't we" and her never wanting to talk about it, but not taking the multiple chances to leave either. People with PTSD have a lot to cope with so it becomes increasingly apparent that you...

@ldj Many thanks for the link, I am better clued up than I was but I must confess I guess the uncertainty makes me wary to get really in depth, however, what you've said could actually help, if this is over I still need to come to terms with things and get some closure. I'll give that book a...

I'd take a rough sketch right now! You're definitely right about trying to find happiness and positivity and embracing that you're the ultimate master of that feeling, it's so difficult though when you're feelings just won't switch on. I do things I enjoy but get no joy from them currently, I...

Lots of great dreams there! Writing a novel, living in the country, peace and serenity, helping animals are all high on my list. It's good to keep sight on what can be achieved alone perhaps than what's "needs" somebody else, focus on a smaller vision of what I wanted because realistically what...

I guess my fear now is... what if things do get better? What if we make up? I'm not sure how I am going to feel now, not after this. The one unshakeable loyal person in my life, who NEVER wavered in their faith in me... has failed. I know that can sound like a lot of pressure but, no matter...

The texting things is very tricky, you're 100% right, especially as it was not really agreed upon. She just mentioned maybe some space could help, then couldn't decide. I felt that I had to make that choice for her, we spoke a bit more on the Friday, but then she vanished again and I just felt...

It's incredibly hard to not take things to heart, I mean, why wouldn't we right? Somebody blanks you, says hurtful things etc is normally the sign of a horrible person we shouldn't be going anywhere near, but it's actually our partners! It's very difficult to see this sort of behaviour and not...

I feel so much for you, I can completely sympathise how hard it is to be given indefinite proclamations. "I'm shutting down and I don't know when I will be ready" makes complete sense to them, and I can see why it does, but to us? It's just uncertainty with zero conclusion, we're left with no...

I agree with the others, you have to remember that a relationship is a two way street and BOTH parties deserve understanding and respect, and to have their needs fulfilled. It sounds like yours weren't being, supporters can (from what I've read and know from my own feelings) be quite willing to...

I just wanted to also add, I understand on the pooch too, we lost a cat we had for 13 years, then the one we adopt after disappeared, so I lost two cats and now seemingly her, all inside about six months, I do struggle to trust and form emotional connections so I can definitely sympathise there!

Thanks @ldj, I 100% genuinely appreciate your responses. Finding this place and seeing I am not alone genuinely has been a massive help, I spent months isolated and afraid and it was like nobody understood at all, quite rightly most people flip their concern to the person more readily obviously...

@ldj Many thanks for the response, I am incredibly grateful for everybody who has taken the time to reply, if anything it's restored my hope a little, not in her, but that I'm not just this awful, overly worried (I never thought I'd be shit on for caring) entirely negative being. I've been sat...

It seems in part you've learnt the biggest first step, don't take things personally, at least, in part, from his friend. It's incredibly tough believe me, my partner is completely different now since her descent into a very bad episode of PTSD and she has treated me in ways I never ever imagined...

I've been there, reasonable conversations suddenly become here's a list of reasons why you suck and why you're the problem, slathered with a little more aggression followed by her then deciding I am stressing her out completed with avoidance and silence. Escalation is a big thing I have...

My girlfriend (well for now at least) often verbalised that she was broken and needed to be fixed, in fact it was something she used to say frequently. I always said that she isn't broken, she is somebody who needs to heal and learn to live again, but that was a oft repeated phrase. There is no...