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Just for today I will stay in the wonderful present. No past or future to worry about.

I took a nap.

I am thinking that although the odd are stacked against me that I can do this. I can figure a way out of my situation into a future of my own. Somehow I am going to figure a way to move out. It's just probably not going to be the path I thought I'd take. And that is starting to become...

I am feeling balanced today. I don't know if it will last but I am enjoying it anyway. At the same time I am cringing with the thought of waking up on 3/12 to having very little health insurance. I'm quite sure that the sun will be up that day and the birds will continue to sing. And life...

I am feeling broken. I slept through taking my night medications last night and am now paying the price. I feel down and out-defeated. I must remember to take very good care of myself today. I must put myself above others or today will get worse. I just need to take it easy today.

I walked my friend's dog today. I gave Lily, the basset hound, a treat and pet her.

I feel exhausted, tired, and spent. I've been up since early this morning and am in desperate need of some sleep. So much is going through my mind. I am thinking too much trying to figure out a way out of my lack of medical insurance. It's a nightmare dealing with the local Medicaid office...

I partially forgave one of my abusers. I wasn't planning on it-it just happened. I've learned that I don't have to forgive any of them. After all these years I still hate them and that is okay for me right now. I'm not at a point of forgiving the rest of them. There is too much pain and too...

You are not alone. Definitely get in touch with your pdoc as soon as possible. I just recognized my first manic episode (it's been happening for years but this is the first time I recognized it) followed by me crashing with SI and getting very depressed. I can't imagine a mixed episode-my...

I am feeling better. Kind of like the calm after the storm. I'm now believing that I just went through a manic episode followed by crashing with SI. It feels weird to name it for the first time and recognize it for what it is. I'll check with my doctor to see if I'm correct. But for now I am...

Feeling better while hanging in there and dealing with everything.

I am feeling better.

I deserve to get a job that I can handle.

@patronus So I'm not the only one afraid of life then? I thought it was just a me thing. I'm glad you wrote about it. Thanks for letting me know I'm not alone on this one.

I realize now that I should have been hospitalized over the weekend. My depression, bipolar and PTSD symptoms worsened since there was a code red (fire) in the hospital I was visiting. It was horrible for me-alarms, strobe light, announcements, and then being locked in a room when I knew there...

I have a new addition to my bears. I have a penguin that talks when you press his foot. His name is Petey. And I have a gigantic Eeyore. My favorites are still Christmas Bear, Cuddles the dog, Lovey the bear and girl bunny.

I had a rough two days and am feeling relief that I woke up feeling emotionally better. I thought I was going to end up partially hospitalized for being so depressed among other things.

The 3-6 inches of snow turned South overnight and missed us. I woke up to no snow. I am so happy!

I am feeling really sick today. I fell back asleep and am still in my pajamas from last night. I guess a week of putting my father first while I am sick has caught up with me. Plus he coughed the whole night long keeping me awake. @therisa I hear you about grocery shopping. I went...

A work in progress.

Fed up, sick, anxious, exhausted, crying, hopeless, lost, hurting, and used are what I feel right now. Helpless, too.

My goal for today was to drive without fear and I accomplished it.

I miss my Mom and my dog, Shamu, right now. I cannot believe that it will be a year since the dog died at the end of March and then a year for my Mom in May. I've been numb all this time and am finally starting to feel alive and like I'm waking up.

I am calmer today. A little bit anyway. I am feeling exhausted though as I am sick. I got a lot accomplished today. I am up in the air about being my father's caregiver. He is one of my abusers and the last thing I want to be doing is caring for him. So I have tons of mixed emotions on...

I am having a PTSD day and feeling like I need to run (like fight or flight). I was in my dad's 2nd floor hospital room when a code red came over the loudspeaker. There was a fire on the 1st floor. There were strobe lights, alarms, and the nurse shut the door and locked us in. All the visual...