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Is there anything in the north east?

Very good ideas! I wouldn't be able to do the service dog thing for a while anyway. I have headphones I could use.

I've pissed off the suicide prevention people before too! No worries. Just people. Oh well. Things will improve for you. Life moves on. I am told that anyways. I have been in automatic mode for many months now being told now that life moves on. So you better prove to me that it does. I am not...

Thanks for both of your messages. Yes it is very uncomfortable for me.> they don't want me to let them know I'm suicidal. I have to call the suicidal chat line which is so demeaning. I would never do it. They don't take calls at night and don't take emails at night so it wouldn't mater anyway. I...

Everyone is is learning how to live then how can everyone needs to have self pity. Everyone needs to forgive themselves for their mistakes. You may see them as these huge mistakes but its part of life. You are learning how to LIVE. Living is so important don't you know? If you don't know how to...

Hi everyone. I am wondering how therapy works for people as a majority. Its not a pol per se but I'd like to see how many therapists let their patients email them throughout the week. My reason being is, I signed a contract recently with my psychiatrist that I wouldn't email her because they...

I don't know about you but the hospital is the last place I'd be referred to by anyone. I escaped my last 2 hospital stays. My stays were at a state hospital system that tied you down. I hope they didn't do that to you. Anyway. I understand why its the LAST place you will go, and I will NOT...

Thats a god idea. I haven't actually thought of that. I do have headphones. I actually had thought of my next step as being a service dog so I could focus on her, but then people would come up to you and want to talk about your dog so that may not work. The headphones would probably be better.

Listen I'm sorry for being harsh the last time I posted, but it just seemed like you were turning your back on everyone's ideas and that you didn't care. I didn't understand the meaning of why you posted if you didn't want advice. After looking more at what you've said, I see the despair that...

I'm not sure if this is what you mean, but it sounds like what I do when I act like the world is a play and I'm a character in it. I play the role that is necessary at that time. For work, I played the work role. I kept my thoughts and feeling focused on work. Then I went home and was able to...

That sounds like me. I know what you mean. You disregard yourself for others. I had done that too. Its hard to change that about yourself. Like you said different people have different histories, and a lot can't relate. It's sad when its close family or friends that can't relate to you. It's...

I wish I could bring it up to my therapist in a way to actually make headway, but I haven't even got to my past yet with her. I can't even discuss what happened to me, so discussing y current sex life is so far removed it seems like I will never get to that part. As a teenager I had dreams...

I would go along with bystander if that's all she was, but my grandmother actually sent me into him. I would run away and ask for help. I knew when she was leaving and going to the store and I would scream for her to take me with her. She would yell at me to get back inside where she knew I...

wow...anger is so intense. I am always so angry about my childhood. I always thought my Mom was my only protector, and I still think she was the closest to it. She says she never heard me when I told her that I was being abused...so I let it go. Then she let him live with us again. The thing...

Anniversaries are horrible. They send me over the edge. I don't know how many hospitalizations I've had because of an anniversary. As for wanting him dead...that's normal. I've had thoughts about killing my family who are already dead. I get angry that they are already dead and I missed the...

I also hear you. To deal with the suffering I usually ablitterate my arm or leg. Its hard when your family fails you. They are supposed to prepare you for the world not make you terrified of it. I know in my case I have my Mom that I hold onto as a safety measure. She was the only safety net I...

The last threads i read on TMS were from 2011. Does anyone have some updated information on TMS? Has anyone had it done? I have a friend thats about to have it done in the next couple weeks, and I was thinking about it for myself. I just was wondering if anyone here had it done?

Exactly! I did well at work too. I could get myself into a case or whatever was needed and focus solely on that. would try and not focus anything on me. Work was great for me I think. I just eventually couldn't deal with everything anymore, and after a neck surgery I had, I had to leave. It was...

I'm sorry you have had such a horrible history. Your injustice is horrible as well. Injustice something it seems we can all relate to very well, which is so horrible in itself. Why are so many children raped and tortured every day without and justice? It makes no sense. I know for my family...

Hi...I can relate very well with your comments. I lived for 35 years doing what I thought was ok. I went into college, the military, and then law enforcement thinking I had everything in control. I thought I had PTSD beat. Then it all fell apart. It fell apart so quickly too. The anger was so...

I was just going off the recent thread that talked about marriage partners expecting sex. I didn't want to hijack that thread so I thought I'd start a different one. I have never had sex beyond when I was raped and abused as a child. I wonder how many other people are in that category? To me...

I am SOO happy about your dog. I love hearing those things. My baby is sleeping behind me right now. I don't know what I would do without her. She is 15 and I love her so much. I can't even imagine the day she won't be with me. I am so happy for you. Give your dog hugs for me!

It sounds like you are just very much ambivalent about getting better. You don't really want to get better. There is a small part that maybe wants to get better. Until you get those 2 two to meet up, you're not going to get anywhere.

I've had a feeling of a higher power since I was a kid. The problem I had was it was wrapped up in religion. when I got older I freed myself of the mainstream religious aspect and just focused on the higher power, who for me was Jesus. A lot of focus for me had to do with my OCD. I was very...

Thanks. I know thats a problem of mine, and thats something my therapist really wants me to focus on, but its so foreign to me that I don't understand even the concepts of it right now. I wish I could relate in that respect. I don't know why the hatred for myself is so deep, but when people say...