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Thanks for the support, I generally don't cry, haven't in years except with the national anthem is played which I have never understood, I didn't serve in the military or anything like that, it just gets to me. But when things go to shit, nope no tears I get this same horrible feeling and...

I know that sounds stupid but I don't know how else to describe it. I didn't sleep well last night and all day today I have just felt as though I am on the verge of tears/crying. I won't say I don't know why, my life is an absolute mess. I hate my new job, I am stuck at my dad's with no...

I know I said I would write more and I am working on it offline, I just am finding it difficult to put here and even talk about a little bit. I really appreciate all the support from everyone here.

@whiteraven when I met with the therapist at 7am for our sessions it was an accommodation that he was willing to do for me as a long term client. It wasn't something that I asked for, I was in a similar situation as you are and he didn't have evening hours, I was just starting a new job and was...

@whiteraven here are a couple of things I have done while working an 8-5 job. It hasn’t always been easy but I had one therapist that was willing to meet with me at 7am for my appointments, my current therapist has late appointments one day a week and I have been his 6pm appointment for as much...

After I had my ptsd breakdown my children had outgrown their favorite stuffed animals and I was recently divorced. This was nearly 2 decades ago, I am in my 50’s now and I can’t sleep without the toys, I take them with me when I travel even flying. I have to be touching them when I am falling...

Sorry I am just getting back here. I have been traveling since Friday afternoon and just finally am settled in one spot for a month give or take. Yes, this is the thoughts are overwhelming. Unfortunately, because of what I have done to myself, I don't believe that not saying will work, and...

There is a detail related to one of my traumas that is for me so humiliating/embarrassing/shameful that I have never been able to bring up. Because of that, other thoughts, distortions, actions and feelings that are connected do not get brought up in therapy because I don’t know how to talk...

I found this on LinkedIn today and thought it was relevant for all of us: Behind every STRONG person is a story that gave them no choice. It wasn't attributed to anyone but I thought it resonated.

@gealach PTSD is a protected disability in the US so it would be protected under anti-discrimination laws, however those laws require that that organization be able to make reasonable accommodations for the employee. I don't know if there are absolute versus relative disqualifiers and I doubt...

Well I am generally a mid-west gal, currently living and working in Florida, where I am we currently have a hurricane warning and a tornado watch, didn't think they went hand in hand but hey, I can handle a tornado!

I am interested in applying for a position in Human Resources with a local law enforcement agency. It is a bit of a career shift but focusing on a particular area but I have been working in local government agencies for the past 15 years. One of the requirements for post-offer, pre-employment...

Rain Theater (Movie) or Stage (Broadway etc)

I have used these guys in the past as well. Not sure if they are still free but they say they have a free application.

Beef Sweet Tea or Unsweet Tea - hot or iced either way

train, love to relax and watch the scenery. 1 month vacation on an isolated beach with all your needs provided: food, beverages, housing etc or 1 month vacation at an isolated mountain cabin next to a lake or stream with all your needs met.

I am a big fan of Brene Brown Introducing: Unlocking Us | Brené Brown

So I have been posting about this the last couple of days in my diary so I thought rather than continuing to update both I would just put a link to it here if anyone is interested in the ongoing. https://www.myptsd.com/threads/moving-on-to-the-future.90683/page-8#post-1744504

I wish I knew what to say to help, I know I can't make you feel better but I want you to know you have support and people here that will listen.

@scout86 yes that is part of what he should be doing, but I don't think that means I should be dreaming/fantasizing about the two of us having sex, I'm pretty sure that crosses over into a dangerous zone because it makes me want to do one of two things, either act them out - WITH HIM, or try to...

@gealach it's been a couple of decades but I took propranolol for tachycardia associated with Grave's Disease. When I took the meds it worked great problem was I was a young, dumb 19-21 yr/old and was too preoccupied with avoiding/re-enacting my traumas to consider the implications of a resting...

Gender-less therapists would be amazing. I really struggle without bringing my personal biases into the therapy room or actually just about any professional setting.

@Skywatcher thanks, I have been considering if I should try a female T if he does decide to transfer me but I struggle with working with professional women. I have tried to see female doctors and dentists in the past and I can't relax and I can't tell them what I need as I had such a horrible...

After nearly three years I finally told my therapist the details of one of my assaults that I have never spoken to anyone about in the past (including my past therapists), I just haven't been able to say anything more than, I was gang-raped to any therapist/P-doc in the past. Now, I am...

As the time approaches to transition away from the career that I have had for the past 15+ years to the dream job I am really beginning to struggle with the decision. I have been working in an interim position for the past 6 weeks with Friday my scheduled last day. I am getting a lot of...