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  1. I

    " The Laundry Must Be Folded This Way", " The Floor Must Be Mopped That Way"

    I decided to leave. I feel that the person you all are talking about is not my husband. Wishing you all the best! IMT
  2. I

    " The Laundry Must Be Folded This Way", " The Floor Must Be Mopped That Way"

    You know... I think if he has not adressed it yet he will adress it when he feels ready for it. My guy has been trough a lot. I know he is a good man + want to be his safe place.
  3. I

    " The Laundry Must Be Folded This Way", " The Floor Must Be Mopped That Way"

    Hubby is seeing a therapist. I am sure he talks with him about that. He did not want to go into detail about his therapsit when I asked him a while ago but asked me to have some trust.
  4. I

    " The Laundry Must Be Folded This Way", " The Floor Must Be Mopped That Way"

    Hubby has been through a lot + he needs my love + care + understanding.
  5. I

    " The Laundry Must Be Folded This Way", " The Floor Must Be Mopped That Way"

    .I do not think that hubby is abusing me. He is a very friendly and soft-spoken guy, never raises his voice, in never saw him angry. He definetly has a problem with things cleaned the "wrong way" or put in the "wrong order" + he definetly sometimes does not aknowledge that but claims that it...
  6. I

    " The Laundry Must Be Folded This Way", " The Floor Must Be Mopped That Way"

    You made me very sad. I thought that this might be normal for a PTSD sufferer. My husband does not "punish" me. He does nitpick, sometimes he does something again when he think it has not been done correctly, like for example with the floor. He thinks I am unable to pack the car trunk and...
  7. I

    " The Laundry Must Be Folded This Way", " The Floor Must Be Mopped That Way"

    Yes, he is very private about it and didn't even talk to me when we were already married... and I figured there was something odd about his behaviour but never really knew what was up with him and when I asked he just smiled and gave an evasive answer. I am happy we finally did communicate.
  8. I

    " The Laundry Must Be Folded This Way", " The Floor Must Be Mopped That Way"

    He does understand that he sometimes uses it as a coping strategy. He doesn't however understand that his neatness is always over the top and that he does not have the right to order me to clean certain things in a certain way.
  9. I

    " The Laundry Must Be Folded This Way", " The Floor Must Be Mopped That Way"

    Yes, my husband does have PTSD. I know that is not on the list of symptoms, but he does have symptoms that are on the list such as insomnia + avoiding crowds. He sometimes cleans to combat his PTSD: going to sleep is stressful for him so he gets up again and cleans and orders thinks until he...
  10. I

    " The Laundry Must Be Folded This Way", " The Floor Must Be Mopped That Way"

    I would do that. I don't like cleaning... but I am a homemaker and he works full time. It's not an option. I don't want him to do a lot of cleaning, because he works a lot, he has trouble sleeping + is already exhausted enough. I am trying to find out what neatness means to him, because I want...
  11. I

    " The Laundry Must Be Folded This Way", " The Floor Must Be Mopped That Way"

    A number of different things. He said that he likes to have his things in order (he considers to cleaness of our house "his business" for some reason) and that he cleans the floor the right way because it gives him the feeling that it's a job well done. He also said when people comming to our...
  12. I

    Using Humour & Descalating Comments For Unhelpful Comments About Ptsd

    Just wondering: What would you consider an "unhelpful comment"?
  13. I

    " The Laundry Must Be Folded This Way", " The Floor Must Be Mopped That Way"

    Thanks for explaining that. So if your spoons are not where they are supposed to be it feels like there is disorder and because there are so many things you can't get order to it makes you feel bad? Did I get this right? Hubby is actually a very friendly guy... but order is important to him...
  14. I

    " The Laundry Must Be Folded This Way", " The Floor Must Be Mopped That Way"

    My husband is seeing a therapist. I am interested in how a floor that had been cleaned the wrong way makes you feel as a sufferer. Why is that so bad for him?
  15. I

    " The Laundry Must Be Folded This Way", " The Floor Must Be Mopped That Way"

    A question for the sufferers. My husband has a gazillion of rules regarding how thinks must be done, how the laundry must be folded, how shoes must be polished, how to shower, how to buckle a belt, how long a trousers must be. For example I am wearing my trousers "too long" and my husband will...
  16. I

    Supporter Girlfriend Of Deployed Combat Vet With Ptsd

    I am not an expert but I think the triggers differ from person to person. I heard that crowds and loud noises often are the most common triggers... and this is the case in my husband too. There are lots of wifes of Vets in the supporters section and I hope you find some useful information there.
  17. I

    Supporter Girlfriend Of Deployed Combat Vet With Ptsd

    Welcome to the board! I hope you find lots of information and encouragement here. I do not want to offend you but I do not think it is a good thing you post your whole name as well as his first name here unless he is okay with that. He might feel betrayed by that + your making yourself very...
  18. I

    General Even With The Ptsd And All, They Still Make Us Happy.

    My guy is an old school gentleman too. He is so patient, I never saw him angry. He is great with kids and animals. He is so loyal and when I was pregnant (which was an accident) he proposed to me. Like others already mentioned my guy also has a great work ethic and he spends very little of the...
  19. I

    Agoraphobia And Ptsd. Help?

    Thanks for sharing. My Vet dislikes crowded places, did not really tell me why. He also sometimes suddenly starts hating a place and I have no idea why, dragged me out of cafes. There is a place we both planned to go, but we never went. He always called it off the last minute, sometimes I had...
  20. I

    I Am So Tired

    I never heard of that book, but I like the first sentence ;) Sometimes it is.
  21. I

    I Am So Tired

    My Vet yelled, my baby cried... again... but... well... I am happy I am with them. This-ain't-easy-but-nothing-worth-your-while-ever-is.
  22. I

    Asking For A Prayer

    I'll be praying for you. Why do you think you have not been the woman you should have been? Have you talked to your boyfriend about thre possibility of PTSD? Do not be mad at me, but I think it is unwise to post both of your names here.
  23. I

    General Vets + Spouses + New Years Eve

    Sweetpea, that sounds pretty nice. I wish you lots and lots of fun! We had a nice New Years Eve, cancelled the babysitter and met with another couple, who also has a child. I think I could get used to things I like being cancelled but I hate it when there is no communication. My hubby does not...
  24. I

    Supporter Wife Of A Vet - Just Wanted To Say "hi"!

    Sorry. I did not want to say you were crazy. Sorry, sorry, sorry.
  25. I

    Supporter In Love With A Combat Vet

    Gingerly, my husband is not intuitive at all. If you need a hug you have to tell him. What you say may be true for a lot of Vets. To my mind however some are not like it and a girl should not think "Oh, my husband must be mean because Vets are so intuitive and he must know I need a hug now"...
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