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Hope things get better. I've been there.

Given that there is no custody arrangement I would not allow visitation. If the child is in his custody he can block you as easy as you are blocking him. I would stay the course and force him to establish paternity. Not being on birth certificate is a win. Good job.

Sorry you are feeling this way. Give it 7-10 days. You probably had at least a concussion. If symptoms persist after 10 days follow up with neurology and psychiatrist.

Most days I am a saint. Eternal love forgiveness and all that. Sometimes I fantasize about doing the world a favor. Long range sniper rifle for one. Slit his throat and listen to him choke on his own blood for another. I am still working on the anger.

I second Clonodine as a miracle drug for my symptoms. I stay away from benzos due to my history of alcohol addiction. Clonodine within 2 days quieted my obsessive thoughts, feelings of constant terror and wanting to jump out of my own skin.

Sorry you are going through this. It can be very hard when trauma stuff replays on a loop. I understand the desire to escape. Are you working with a therapist or psychiatrist? I numbed with alcohol for years. After being put on medication for my symptoms, I no longer want to self medicate. Good...

Thank you. I am also proud of myself. It has taken a lot of work to get here. It has been a painful year.

Also symptoms can be so consuming that trying to intermesh in a reciprocal loving relationship can be an added stress (though possible a positive stress). That additional stress of relating to somebody on a deeper level can trigger symptoms as well.

I recently ended a life long friend ship with my "bestfriend". She was part of the group in high school that ostracized me after my mom died. Most of it is blurry but I remember a lot of people putting me up to things, getting me to do something and then using what I had done as an example of...

I was in a car accident last year with a concussion. It was very disturbing because I couldn't tell the difference between the dissociation and the head injury symptoms. It was hard for the doctors to treat me because I was so damn confused about everything I couldn't give them a straight...

I struggled with my PTSD all through the college experience. In the end I found that if I talked to my professors and advisers about my struggle overall they were very supportive and able to work with me and offer some help in balancing the load. (It took failing out and losing my financial aide...

I am also interested in the relationship between PTSD and sensory integration issues. Myself and many of the people with PTSD I know in real life seem to struggle with processing sensory information from the environment in various ways. For example, I can not understand or tolerate loud noise or...

Thanks for the link.

Thanks for this topic. I never understood derealization. I resonate with this experience as well.

Started meds for exacerbated depression and dissociative symptoms. Have chronic pain. Started on citalopram 20 mg (dry mouth and eyes). Clonidine (alpha blocker to reduce norepinephrine) and had pain addressed via lidocane patch. That kind of pain you forget you have because you're accustomed to...

I am a health care provider. I also have a history of sexual assault. I have had reproductive cancer. I go for quarterly screenings some of which involve a trans-vaginal ultrasound. I have to trust the examiner. I think all health care workers could up their game on asking more questions about...

I didn't know I had PTSD until 12 years later. Although I suppose I had symptoms all along. I buried that shit so far, tied it up and put rocks on it. I was fine-ish. I accomplished a lot. It worked. Then I got cancer. Not just cancer but a type of hereditary cancer. The same kind that had taken...

Interesting idea I am not diagnosed with DID as far as I know my parts share coconsciousness. I defiantly have a voice that speaks between my parts in a self helper sort of way. Always very compassionate about the experiences of each part and encouraging compassion between parts. Does that make...

I am also a cancer survivor. Cancer often gets excluded in PTSD trauma criteria as being a natural disease state or "normal expected life event". Having watched a loved one die from cancer treatment as a kid and going through it myself I can tell you there ain't nothing normal or expected about...

"Do you think they raped you because you raped them in a past life" How can you be sure you aren't just imagining?(dissociated memory of rapes) Well everybody has PTSD... You're crazy, normal people know that if they act that way everybody will hate them

You know you have complex trauma because whenever you pull on a memory thread and new hairball come up to choke you

Spot on

Horrible f*cking people ineed. Get surrounded by enough of them at a young enough age and they start to look normal in some way. You start to internalize that until you are left wondering what the f*ck is wrong with you that makes everybody treat you like shit. The communal whipping girl.

I live with depression and PTSD with dissociation. When I was a teen my mother died. The rest of my family fell into drug use and alcoholism. I went hungry a lot. I had a boyfriend who was controlling and abusive who I relied on to feed me and a group of shitty horrible friends. When I broke up...

I wonder if anybody has looked into the evolutionary psychology perspective on PTSD diagnosis? There is a body of literature on psychological impact on current v future time preference (short term risk taking v long term goal building) and the relationship between evolutionary based factors that...