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I would like to read the thread

I would love to talk to you

Thank you @ladee It has been an interesting and rough road for me and such a looong story. Hugs back.

I personally didn't quite appreciate the added hardship of singleness, which according to Watchtower publications, "singleness is a gift". Bullsh#t!!! I knew how to put up with all this bullsh#t but I was tired of "being strong enough" to put up with bullsh#t. Does this make any sense? I am...

I thought it was because I was part of the religion that I was able to be strong despite having PTSD and coming from an extremely weird and dysfunctional family. So if you remain a faithful Jehovah's Witness with strong faith in God, he will give you strength to endure hardships and the...

I did not rebel against the religion and never intended to. I was sick and tired of mentally learning to be positive no matter what I go through and I went through a heck of a lot. And I had to mentally learn how to be positive and strong to get through stuff and to be prepared, according to...

Sorry about the obvious autocorrect intervention on my post. Lol Gotta love autocorrect!

Thank you so much. Someone can relate. Yay! I will definitely check it out.

Thank you. I think this is what happened. I had learned to be as positive as I could despite abuse, school bullies, hypocrisy in the religion I was once part of, financial crap, life, etc. And I was a happy person because of it. I had the religion, work and life all down pat. But I was 26 and...

Thank you

I don't know how to respond to this but I can relate. =)

Thank you so much. I love this forum so far even though I haven't been on it long yet. I appreciate it sooo much. =)

I'm so sorry you are going through this and it is rough for her too. That sucks. Maybe she can learn to trust you again after the experience she had with someone taking advantage of her. Maybe you can show her that you are different from the man who raped her, and teach her that there are good...

Yeah. You know what happened to me? I used to feel very shy and nervous and didn't know what "normal" people around me thought of me, because of my circumstances growing up that I had no control over, so I was very self conscious and tried so hard to "prove" to other people that everything in my...

I once had a vertigo attack from stress and around the same time period, I was fainting on occasion, but that was usually triggered by heat.

Can anyone relate to this? I am trying to make sense of this. I don't even know how this was possible but despite some pretty harsh abuse throughout childhood and moving out and facing adulthood without my parents from age 18 on, I have always been able to move forward, maintain a positive...

I'm just trying to sort everything out now

I just started to degrade myself. I was hurting myself emotionally and weakening my backbone I once had. It's like I suddenly just turned against myself. And then I just started making bad decisions and stopped taking care of myself. At the time, I still believed in the religion but was...

And I have a terribly hard time with forgiveness

My therapist suggested yoga to me. I go when I feel like it but I'm still stuck with these feelings. I know I can't make anything go back to where it was and sometimes we have to break before we can get to a better place in life again. I don't see that yet where I am in my life now but I am...

I used to write poetry, listen to awesome music, and do art, and make jewelry, volunteer, do things for others and make or give things to others, cook, sleep, work, (I have always kept myself busy), made friends, did my religion I used to be a pArt of almost 24/7, I read books about PTSD, deep...

I have my therapist that I see every other week. Other than that, I don't have any friends that understand what I have been through and it leaves me feeling achy inside real bad. I want to get it all out of my system, I want to heal and I want to move on And breathe and live my life.

That sounds awesome

The thing is, I love my job and the people I work for. It would not be a good choice for me to leave it. And most of the customers I have to deal with are pleasant people. I'm just not in a good place in my life right now and not too happy with myself either and am still somewhat confused about...

I also feel like I have no right or excuse to feel this way. I feel so much shame it's not even funny in any way. I wish it were. Lol. I feel like I am bringing all this on myself, like it is all my fault, where I am in my life now and I want to blame it on other people but I can't. But in...