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Sorry I couldn't reply earlier!! Your response was great!! Thank you :) and I have thought about the live in nanny thing. I've checked out nanny agencies that send girls abroad :) I figured, if I have to live with more strangers, it might as well be in a new and exciting place. I'm just saving...

Lovely <3

That's what I meant :)

Well.. I'm responsible for my own life. So hopefully I've learned enough to not be swayed into isolation again. It's not that he wants me to be alone, but he tares me apart with no emotional energy left.

Thanks @Flossy . I hope I can get out of this way of life soon. I don't think I'll be interested in anyone for a while. I'm more than burnt out and fairly jaded. Hopefully that will give me some time to make friends and build a life so that another partner can't tare it down again.

Huh. I didn't know that was a thing!!

No, you're good love. I didn't mean to minimulize anyone's experience. I do dull mine down to deal with it. I'll tell people terrible things that happened to me and laugh about it. I laugh at most things because life's been so overwhelmingly harmful. I can only work through so much at a...

No, it sounds wonderful!! But I don't have a village. @Flossy .. I have no friends or family. All my friends shunned me after I stopped believing in God. My family kicked me out when I tried to turn my dad into the police. All I have is my verbally abusive boyfriend that im trying to find means...

Good luck with everything!! I wish I had some insight to share with you. Hugs if you'll have em!!

I feel that. I try my hardest to look for the positive while finding the truth. Otherwise, what is there to live for?

I'm sorry you had that experience! It sounds like he was using an illness as an excuse to be an asshole. That's not fair to you or anyone else. I assure you my flashbacks, sleeping with my eyes open, anxiety attacks and triggers are very real. But I work with the people that will work with me...

[/ATTACH] Great quote!!

Can you elaborate?

I know love, I've been there. A lot. @sigh .. I'm sorry if I triggered you.

What's been done to me is small compared to the mental rape of today's society. I cry for that more than anything. I recognize that my depression tends to begin and end with that.

Oh WOW!! Thanks for the heads up :( I could see that happening.

Stoked to be happy again.

Thanks @ReachingOutJ !! Good luck with all that. I usually eat something small than come home from work and have a mixed pint cocktail so I don't hate people.

Thanks <3 @Whispering_Truth

It's usually just all I can stomach.

For sure.

That's a good idea <3 I usually just force myself to eat a cup of granola or something.

She does not sound legit. I'm really sketched out by that. Maybe don't go to your landlord yet. Is there another therapist option for right now or soon?

I've been doing this way too often recently. I don't know if it's life's complications right now or what. It's like, I look at food and think "hey life source. f*ck you" it got better once I got a job, but I've lost a lot of weight. And I'm doing it again today.

I would think, if anything, it makes you more aware. So maybe it can do the opposite?