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@Changing4Best I was really afraid of this too - all of my abusers have been men. But as others have noted - developing trust in someone that your PTSD mind instantly identifies as a potential threat - can help you to heal. It has helped me get away from that rigid, black and white thinking...

Thanks everyone - I always get the best advice from you all I compartmentalize a little too well I guess. All those dissociative barriers have actually let me function pretty well in the working world. I think I will be able to hold it together while I am in country - like @Friday says - its at...

I guess this question is for the military type folks. My work takes me to operational settings occasionally where I work with our military counterparts - not in the theater - but close. I am on my way back from home from a short trip and am realizing how much I had completely turned off my...

I have had dreams where one my parts was talking to me and asking questions and a couple of times this same part was shouting at me to save someone and woke me up several times I also once dreamed I was looking at a strange tattoo that my part had and when I woke up I knew it was the hood...

I get headaches and feel burned out - kind of like a hangover

I had an endoscopy and colonoscopy today and was heavily sedated with propofol (given in the IV) and I didn't even tell them I had PTSD - it was just their normal procedure. I don't remember being in the recovery room and came home and took a nap afterwards. My throat is not sore and neither is...

This is how it is with my therapist too. We don't focus on parts specifically but on the trauma and how I and all of my parts are affected. I realize that what I consider to be voices or inside entities also represent the same feelings and symptoms as PTSD. So while I may have an angry voice...

It sounds like you have an excellent therapist, very skilled and caring. I wish all of us on this forum had access to trauma therapy like this. My therapist is also a psydoc, so I know there are at least a few out there that do more than med management.

Thanks everyone for your support. My T actually cancelled the rest of his appointments this week to deal with the loss of his dog so I won't be able to bring this up with him for another week. I am hoping that when I see him next time he will have had time process the loss a little. I know he...

This happens to me too. I actually feel better when the anxiety or fight/flight kicks in - like I am back in the real world. I'm glad it happens because its stops the dissociation cold.

I've only recently become aware that all of the parts that I created during my childhood are still there - in spite of many years of intensive treatment and my not being aware of them for decades afterwards. I think as the phobia of your internal processes lessens and your are able to tune in...

I'm not sure what my diagnosis is but I have a couple of voices without names, one I call the Scream, she is the flight response I suppose and a traumatized teenage version of me that holds my sexuality, I call her the Sexual One. My other sides have names: a variation of my own name, the name...

I was hoping to avoid talking about this with him but I can see from everyone's feedback that I need to tell him how I am feeling so that I can continue with the trauma work. Kind of dreading it though.

Last week my T, who so far I like a lot and trust as much as I am able told me that he was having a hard day because his pet was dying. I felt bad for him and we talked about it for about 5 minutes at the beginning and end of session. I asked questions and gave advice the way you would with a...

I have PTSD due to previous life events but working in the ER/ ICU really exacerbated my symptoms. I would ruminate obsessively about the miseries of life I saw everyday. Finally, I took a year off, studied public health and then decided to put a toe back in the clinical arena by doing some...

I have this too. I used to just accept it as something I could not change but lately I have been feeling angry about it. I feel like my sexuality was stunted and twisted into something that served my abuser and not me. I would like to have a healthy sexuality that is free of abuse brainwashing...

I like this! Maybe it is constipation or a bad back or something. I will try to keep this more forward in my mind the next time I'm in the waiting room. This is exactly what is going on. There is a voice with a lot of rage about past violence that coming out now and yeah - I need to explore it.

So my T shares a space with several other therapists. There is one whose office door opens right into the waiting room and he always seems to be going in and out when I am waiting for my session to start. The first time I saw him I thought "wow that guy seems really burned out, glad he's not my...

I got recommendations from sidran.org, those therapists were completely booked up but one referred me to the therapist I am seeing now. I am very happy with him so far. Keep trying.

I have been talking to my therapist about him the last two sessions and trying to express his feelings so that he doesn't try to take over. Its a struggle though, I feel a lot of pressure inside and feel like I have to focus really hard to stay online mentally. I have also been trying to talk to...

I use Woebot too and it does help - it asks you to name your emotion, write about the situation around the emotion then reminds you of some of the cognitive distortions that could be happening and then asks you to rewrite the situation. I haven't tried Innerhour yet but I will.

Fearful avoidant all the way - damn

This is exactly what I am afraid of. I do think he needs treatment because he is the suicidal voice and he can pound away at me with that. When I was a kid I tried to commit suicide because I couldn't stand to listen to him telling me to die anymore. He no longer tells me to die but always lets...

This is where I would like to be- in charge and calm. The voice I can't seem to manage right now is this persecutor who is actually one of my abusers, he insults me a lot and is suicidal. He wants to come out during therapy and I'm worried about what he'll say to my T.

@Muttly I guess I don't want to dissociate during therapy because I want the everyday me to be able to handle the memories and feelings. Also I think I am programmed from my treatment as a kid that listening to voices is bad. @shimmerz I like the sour candy idea. I like really salty licorice...