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Thanks. I will cancel and ask for a regular session. I'm pretty sure she won't like it, but the thought of doing EMDR right now, with her, freaks me out. It's going to be hard to make myself go to the next session! :chicken::nailbiting::(

You have achieved a lot recently. Great going that you feel able to ask for a female nurse to be there - that's so good. Keep going Mytai, you're doing some important things.

So very, very glad you're not pregnant. But sucks to have the cramping.

Yes, that would be probably the best option, but she doesn't use one (not on her business card anyway). I guess I'll have to see her. Hmm, doesn't fill me with excitement, or hope. Oh well, worst case is I'll know what she meant, and I'll have closure on it if I don't continue. I'm actually...

animal

Yes, I probably ought to try and sort this out. I'm just feeling pretty negative about my chances I guess. I thought something similar was sorted before, but it just seems to have gotten worse. I am full of self-doubt now, worse than ever. Maybe I trusted too much, maybe I don't trust enough...

numb, distant Don't want to feel anything right now.

house

You have a good point - I have made some progress, even though I feel it's difficult now. And you caught me out too - I have been trying to go back to pretending nothing is wrong. I have got to try not to do that.

Thanks for the replies! I am still thinking about what to do. Part of me wants to just give up. That was the first time I'd ever told anyone my stuff, and it seems like there's just too many things, both for myself and stuff my family faced, to be believable. I have been really emotional in...

Mytai - I liked your post because it means you are still hanging in there. You are tough as nails, you are stronger than you think. Hoping the psychiatrist can help. You are not alone - I know it isn't the same as being there in person, but we are here for you.

brown (King Brown is a type of snake in Australia)

I forgot - these are the criteria for Histrionic: An individual diagnosed with histrionic personality disorder needs to show at least 5 of the following criteria: Is uncomfortable in situations in which he or she is not the center of attention. Interaction with others is often characterized...

I have debated very hard about posting this, and almost decided not to, but then I thought - well, I've got nothing to lose (I hope). I had another difficult session today, first one back after Christmas/New Year. I was supposed to have an EMDR session, but yesterday left messages for her that...

This is a great thread - I'm just starting out with this. I have begun to exercise and eat right again, only started a week ago, but usually don't last more than a day or two, so a week means it's going well so far. Haven't done so well with other stuff, but got to start somewhere. Hope I can...

Thank you for posting this. I hadn't heard of them before.

pins

Stressed, fearful, anxious, sad. Dealing with a lot of SI lately, but hanging in there. Nervous about my next session on the 7th.

Mytai - I'm so, so sorry. This has been...a horrific experience, repeatedly. I have only just caught up on this thread. You have done so blindingly, brilliantly well so far. I know it must be feeling impossible to pick yourself up and keep going, but that is what you must do. This hell will...

Maybe your subconscious is using the strongest representation of "man" that it has? Without him ever harming you in any way, your Dad might be the default symbol? I've had something like that happen before, though I'm afraid I cannot remember any details. :(

Hey Georgia. I've had dealings with HSBC before, and haven't had them charge like that. Maybe that one you read about online was a mistake, rather than a policy of theirs? I think that there would be consumer law against crazy fees like that. Banks do take New Year's Day off, so you'll be...

Welcome @MrIdentical - hopefully here you will get some of the support you so desperately need, and deserve. This forum is awesome, I registered a few months ago, and it has been amazingly helpful ever since. Love your avatar by the way - Tom Baker is the best Dr Who in my opinion! You'll...

It's tough to try and get through without family support. Sounds like they will think what they like, regardless. In a way, perhaps you are putting them first, as you are viewing your recovery through the lens of "how will they react". If you have any way of putting more distance between them...

Is there any possibility of changing your meds? Though I'm sure you've probably thought of that already. Sucks that you can't get any therapy right now, but hopefully things change in the future and that you can later on.

This is so hard. Please try not to beat yourself up about it - it seems to have been driven by fear (PTSD) rather than any bad motives on your part. This girl seems amazing, and forgiving. In fact, she may be more able to forgive you than you are of yourself yet. Best thing to do - come clean.