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Thanks for that idea, I'll run that by my therapist. Thanks for your response! Did his therapist explain why finding the alters was necessary before processing? Is it not possible to do it when you have alters? I hear these four words a lot in therapy, not the cheerfullest thing to hear...

No matter which way we try to go about it, I dissociate EVERY time we start doing EMDR, and its getting very discouraging. My T says the goal is for me to be able to do EMDR while staying present. We've done lots of groundwork, learning things like safe place imagery, protective and other...

Totally both of those things. I've gotten better at recognizing which sensations relate to which emotions, but its still a big struggle. And yeah, I often say "I'm okay" when I'm not or "I'm low" when I'm angry or sad or scared or any number of things.

Thanks for everyone's responses and ideas. I'm definitely not asking for help with my HW (which was to try to list emotions that were allowed and that were not allowed in my home growing up). Just for ideas of how others have been helped to learn to recognize and name feelings. I like this...

Not exactly, but I have no contact with my family and it is super difficult and painful. It sounds as if your extended family is very unhealthy because they can't talk about real things and thats a huge red flag about inner unhealthiness. It sounds like their outward "success" is just a fraud...

My T says I'm emotionally blunted and need to develop a greater emotional vocabulary. She gave me some HW to do, but I'm wanting more I can do so I can increase this ability quicker. I couldn't really find much online though. What has helped you to develop greater emotional vocabulary or...

No, actually, this makes a lot of sense, I can relate, thanks!

I could really relate to this. We have been off EMDR for a while cause I got unstable, but we're going back to it soon.

Oh my gosh yes. I am always thinking this same thing!/ Really your whole post was great and helpful, thanks for writing it!

This makes a lot of sense. Its difficult to get out of denial when we're raised to live in denial by our abusers. And until we're stable enough to handle it, some forms of denial may help us from being overwhelmed as we're trying to heal. Thanks for these insights.

Oh my gosh, I can totally relate to this. My family was just like this--pointing out other abuse, comparing, etc--and then saying "aren't you so glad we're not like this?" when they were doing different but just as harmful things. I like your idea of shifting focus to the impact--which is...

I never thought of it like this, but yeah, I think sometimes I don't want it to 'count' too, like if it doesn't count than somehow its all my fault which means I'm in control and I can get myself out of this. Interesting, what do you mean by avoidance? I wanted to quote your whole post here...

I like your technique of trying to go through it logically, and also putting another kid in your place and realizing if it would not be okay to happen to another kid, its not okay that it happened to you. That is a good point. I have a huge tendency to try to dissect and figure things out, I...

Intersting, @shimmerz , I've never mindfully compartmentalized (at least, as far as I recognize), but I have read that people can use dissociative in non-pathological ways, like when a therapist is having a hard time in her real life but has to shelf that in order to be there for her clients for...

If you were abused as a child, do you ever keep reflecting on it over and over and try to determine if it really 'counted' as abuse? I do this all the time. I'll even look up official definitions of physical, sexual, emotional abuse, and of neglect (educational, medical, etc), and I will see...

Interesting, I never thought of it that way, but that makes sense.

This totally happens to me, too! It feels good to read someone else having the same experience and to know someone understands! Yes, this is totally part of my experience too. Things would be so much easier if it weren't true and there weren't parts. Really, I could have quoted you whole post...

Does anyone else with DID struggle with accepting the diagnosis and go back and forth between accepting it and disbelieving it? I guess I already know the answer to this, of course people do with any diagnosis. I wish I could just feel 'sure' one way or the other. I know when I accept it and...

Have you tried telling the angry parts something like "I get it! Progress seems dangerous cause you know you can survive with things as they are, but not if they change. Thanks for trying to protect me! I promise I will not let us get into any dangerous situations like we were in when we were...

Sometimes just reaching out, speaking or typing the confusion or hurt, can help. Good job doing that!

Yeah, its tough. When I just try to accept that I may not know everything, and just try focusing on the here and now which is all I have potential control over, it can help.

My understanding is that in EMDR, not everything that comes up necessarily happened. It can be kind of like dreams--with elements or symbols of true events. At the same time, true events can come up as well. Its difficult to sort through. Memory isn't perfect, as traumatic experiences aren't...

My go to is: 1 cup hot water 1 TB lemon juice 1 TB honey and a dash of cayenne powder Basically anything to keep your throat coated like creamies, pudding, etc. as well, and stay hydrated. Feel better!

I'm sorry you're going through this! I'm just a couple months "ahead of you" in this, having been diagnosed the end of last year, and I just want to echo the advice of others on here, whose advice has helped me. 1. Remember, this doesn't change anything about you, it just helps you understand...

This sounds similar to a dissociative disorder. Maybe talk with your therapist about it.