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Today I started slow. Cloudy and cold and so were my insides. But surprisingly after 20 minutes I felt an energy boost. Walked an hour plus errands. 10,000 plus steps. Yay. Mind is infinitely better after walking.

High cortisol levels could be the culprit. I get it about half an hour after falling asleep. It wakes me up. Our stress hormones are irregular with PTSD. It's like they almost have a mind of their own - at least when they wake me same time every night without nightmares. Also night time was the...

Could only do half an hour today. Too pooped. I never know for sure until I start to walk how much I can do. Cold and cloudy and occasional mist. Slow to moderate pace. Listened to Syreeta and Stevie Wonder from '70's. Tomorrow sunny and low 60's. Hope for invigorating walk then.

If you are like me, the feelings will come when it's safe. My beloved grandmother died when I was 21. It hit me full force like it just happened when I was 48. I cried and cried and thought my heart would break. A friend died when I was 42. It hit me when I was 56. Same unbelievable fresh grief...

That's beautiful. I wrote a book, which I didn't realize was a metaphor for my experience of PTSD until I was done. Art is truly healing. My fairy tale was reality. It told me what I needed to know.

Your compassion is amazing, but I am putting you first. What does he do to contribute to your well being? There has to be a give and take, a balance. Too often we repeat into adulthood what we did as children and take care of others with little or no thought for ourselves. We also try to read...

Hugs to all having a rough time. Feel like the top of my head has been clawed by a tiger. My feet feel light and fluffy ever since last somatic therapy. Tired. Tired. Always tired.

It is interesting to think how our personally controlled environment can reflect our state of mind or past. Now that I live with someone who is clean and organized, I pretty much stay that way too. But I notice that when I am not dealing with issues, usually family, the area behind the cabinets...

One time I moved to a new apartment. I'd lived there a couple months before a friend come over. It was an unplanned visit. I gave her a quick tour. As we were leaving, we passed the kitchen and my friend said, Whoa! What's with your kitchen. I suddenly noticed my apartment was perfectly clean...

If the memories of the trauma weren't integrated and permanently filed away at the time as events over and done with due to the processes of the survival brain, than the memories can stay as fresh as a daisy. Therapy that works with moving the trauma energy out of the body is the closest thing...

You have more value than I can adequately put into words. Until you feel it, act as if. It may feel ridiculous but it works. Feelings are not facts, most especially when you feel of little value. One day you will know your value and be amazed.

Locking it away hasn't worked well for you. If you find a good and responsive trauma therapist, you can slowly and safely release the trauma energy in your own time as you wish. I don't like this T canceling appointments, but maybe there is an exceptional reason for it. I don't know. I hope...

Welcome! When you were shaking, you were releasing trauma energy that didn't get released at the time. You are starting to reboot the system. Yay! But oh I know it is tough. I am 57 and didn't start significantly releasing until a few years ago. I had done only talk therapy, which gave me...

I read a few books by Alberto Villoldos (sp) and his experiences with a shaman in Peru and taking the drug and becoming a shaman himself, and because of those books I had renewed hope in healing from PTSD. I am personally too terrified of having a bad trip so unless that changes I won't try...

It's good to get it off your chest, but I am afraid you will burn out unless you take the time to change and do things like learning coping techniques. That will increase your wellbeing and you won't be as exhausted. Plus you will be able to help the people you are having workshops for. Nothing...

@Lucycat - My research has shown that there is possibly a relationship between IBS and inflammation, but as in practically all physical ailments there are contradictory studies. Her husband's diet of junk food, caffeine, etc. is highly acidic. Baking soda and water alkalizes the system and...

You are kind and loving, but if he wants to eat a bad diet, you can't make him change. He must find so much comfort in eating that way that he can't bring himself to change. It's maybe too terrifying. But if he would have a half teaspoon baking soda with water 2 or 3 times a day, it would...

That's fantastic. For me it was smashing tennis balls shooting out of a machine hour after hour. But I tore my right gluteus maximus three times and that's the end of that. I walk, sometimes for hours. I miss going fast. Sometimes warmed up I will run a little and the stress release is...

Usually when I am lost in, or preoccupied with, intense thought loops involving justice at last, I am trying to alleviate feelings of intense discomfort inside - as if what I imagine could really fix what ails me. So I try to do what I can to bring myself to a state of calm and that usually...

I got a lot of help from books: 8 Keys to Safe Trauma Recovery by Babette Rothschild Waking the Tiger by Peter Levine Coping With Trauma Related Dissociation by Boon et al Mindful meditation you can learn on line. The key for me has been working within. I went to a shrink for 25 years and...

Sneezy. Feet cold. Tired. Mentally okay. Emotionally quiet veering more towards content than not. Looking forward to walk in sun.

I love your kitty!! Thank you for the story. I hope you can curl up beside her and nap too.

If you were stressed or something, I would say that maybe you were looking for something outside yourself to fix or change the inside of yourself. Or maybe if you were in unusual circumstances or a different location, you are remembering a former life! I am glad if you didn't pick up a cig. I...

I hear you and identify. I have been trying to look at it as a message from the Universe to love myself even if no one else does. My husband loves me but until I met him at 50, it was a very alone life. When I completely gave up on meeting anyone, of course I met him and he practically had to...

Morning thru 5 p.m. I feel best. After 5 thru dawn were the bad times as a kid.