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For me- weed was my rock. Kept me happy, made me feel amazing, and kept my traumas well suppressed. Then the major catalyst/trigger struck- and all of sudden weed no longer, well, worked. It made me even hyper-awarer. Made my thoughts ping around even more violently in my head. Will I ever...

Considering there is a "doctor" around every corner here in CA, anxiously awaiting to give you a prescription for $35 because "my back hurts..." I can't imagine a world where you can't find one with just a bit of research or asking around.

As a CA resident, I can't help but ask if you've considered marijuana.

Weed

I'm glad you asked this question. When I started Zoloft 2 months ago I had the strangest feelings of disorientation and suicidal thoughts. About 2 weeks in my Psychiatist prescribed Klonopin to "take the edge off a bit." I was literally in heaven. I was back to my old self- smoking...

So sorry to hear about what you went through. For what it's worth, it took me away from my pain for a brief moment, so thank you for that. You do sound like a smart, tough young gal that can get through whatever else life has in store for you. Ps I went to a little university in Ottawa KS...

thanks for sharing! I too am not 100% sure or accepting of my diagnosis.

I'm fascinated by our brain- and how it can suppress intense emotional pain until something triggers it. If you don't mind sharing, I'd love to hear what the traumatic event was in your life, and what -if anything- caused it to initially manifest.

Just as a brief history- my "uncle" molested me - it began when I was 18 and manifested at 30 (about 9 months ago) when a toddler innocently bouncing in my lap began arousing me. Years 18-30 were filled with love, then divorce, then nonstop promiscuity like strip clubs and excessive drinking...

I really enjoyed your reading your post! I am absolutely stuck in a cycle of wishing. Why did my "uncle" molest me? Why didn't I stop him? Etc... WILL THIS BE FOREVER??? Pounding in my head as my buddies enjoy their sips of beer and joints and I'm just going through the motions along with them...

Thanks guys, and sorry about the details or some of my choice of words. I realize that could be offensive to some. I'm wondering, what are some good lines of work for people with PTSD? Currently I'm a recruiter - but this will certainly not last long. My job is dependant on having casual...

I was just diagnosed in Tuesday. I don't want to believe this will last forever, that thought makes me want to kill myself. I'm 30. My "uncle" (no blood relation, moms best friend) started molesting me at age 18. It happened very gradually and I am very ashamed that I allowed it to happen...