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That is all... except.. Google put together this really nice presentation about it. Google Arts & Culture

So.. two weeks ago I tried to fix myself, in a permanent manner. I went to a lake where I was happy, back in 96, drank for the first time in 5.5 years, downed a bottle of sleeping pills, stumbled into the lake, then passed out on the shore. They found me the following afternoon, apparently the...

So hey again. I was feeling better for a long time, and thought I was 'over it'.. I thought I had my symptoms really in hand.. and maybe I did. But that time seems to be over. The Curse is so strong right now. I've missed so much time from work that they put me on restricted leave, which is...

Hey guys. Does anyone have experience with migraines? I don't get them myself (well, maybe one every 9-10 years) but my girlfriend is borderline crippled by them. She is in massive pain almost constantly, and I have to just stand there feeling like there's nothing I can do. She's even starting...

Bad times.. I've been missing lots of work due to symptoms and other things.. On tuesday the boss calls me in and lets me know that it can't go on, that people in HR are watching me. Been in a low level panic ever since. Lots of nausea.. I've been able to keep food down, but I feel like I'm...

Hey, it looks like there is a video game in development that is trying to convey the effects of mental illness through the gameplay. A viking woman who watched her family die is trying to function despite suffering from severe psychosis and PTSD. From reading the development interviews it looks...

aka: Displaced Anger. So this thing.. I touched on it before.. blaming God for sticking me in a horrible situation.. Largely due to the quote "God has a plan". (and his plan for me seemed to be misery and torment throughout my childhood).. But now that I have this info on my father.. that he...

So I was looking about last night, about alcoholic families, and I found this article about the roles in an alcoholic family. Some of them jumped out at me, particularly the ones of Hero and Lost Child. The lost child one, it struck a deep chord in me. Here it is: Lost Child - no connection to...

Holy crap, I won the job. According to my boss I 'slaughtered' the interview, and beat the competition soundly. I was worried for a moment, but when I saw my opponents I had a good feeling. -Nobody- dressed up for the interview.. Literally nobody. They all came in dressed in... well not rags...

A big part of PTSD is shame, and that shame is born of pride. I have a great deal of shame over some of my traumas, because of pride. I used to always think that it was my fault somehow. That I could have done something different, that I had control over the situations. And it is true that I...

Okay so I've gone manic today. It happened while I was responding to another thread about someone feeling uneasy among their own people and comfortable around other folks. Shortly after my post I experienced enlightenment and the beauty of the world washed over me. I am beautiful, I am...

Okay, so there's this thing that I've been doing lately. It's taken years of work, but I'm really getting good at it now. I realized that my story was too long. Waaay too long. I am the sort that ruminates a lot. I would replay the stories of my traumas in my head, and put them into words...

Something that's been bothering me a lot lately is that I'm getting older. I'm pushing 40 now, but I don't feel like I should be. I feel younger, and certainly behave younger... or at least younger than I think I 'should' by societal standards. I'm rebuilding my life after a failed marriage...

So anyway... Well, so much has gone on that I wouldn't know where to start; so I'm just going to start wherever I can and see what happens. Okay so, since the last time I checked in, a lot has gone on. One of the biggest things is that I started organizing my life a lot more. I started using...

I had a dream where two shadowy figures were standing over me, but I couldn't move to pull off my CPAP and look at them closer. Has anybody else ever had it?

I've been going back to college for a while, but all my previous classes have been online. I'm now in my first 'on the ground' class, and although I hope for there to be no problems, I worry that there may be some. There's a group project on the horizon and while I certainly hope for the best, I...

I really dislike the word 'rape'. I'm being brave at fighting through my shame at being a victim, but as a guy it's really really really hard to accept that label. It just hurts. It's more painful than when I had to admit that I was an alcoholic. It's just the label that is so unbearable...

I always get so spooked when I write things in here. Well, on the forums in general. I keep expecting that everyone here is just going to say "Okay, he's just too f*cking crazy!" and cast me out. Or that I'm going to horribly damage my 'image' here. I've done it before in other places, done...

Okay so this morning at an online meeting, the topic was boundaries and self-care. I ended up saying much more than I thought. I was basically raised to have no boundaries, or at least that is what I learned from people. From various places I learned that I should show unconditional love to...

Okay so... found some stuff out. I was putzing around my apt last night thinking about things, and how I'm trying out this whole "Let go and let God thing. And I'm not exactly sure how, but it washes over me that even back then when I was a little kid, I was looking to God to fill me and make me...

Does anyone know of any good online codependency resources? Websites, forums, stuff of that nature? Last night I realized that just because I'm not in a codependent relationship right now, doesn't mean that I'm no longer codependent. I was thinking last night about all my addictions, and how...

So they fired my boss this morning. Out of nowhere, one moment she was in her office talking to an HR guy, next thing he's walking her out of the building. She didn't say a word in passing. It's over. I'm thinking it's all over, for me at least. The only reason I have a job at all is because she...

I'm freaking out at work. Seriously having to do my breathing exercises and watching the clock until I can have a smoke, which never seems to move. I swear I've been sitting here an hour and the damn thing hasn't moved 12 minutes yet. The people in this building.. They know there's something...

I'm not sure exactly what this counts as. I haven't really told anyone because it's crazy embarrassing, and also I'm a guy, so this sort of thing really isn't supposed to happen to me (well it's not supposed to happen to anyone) Well shit I don't know what I'm saying.. Anyway, here goes. I was...

*Triggers. So many triggers* I'm not sure if I should be posting this in here, because there are so many who have felt the brunt of this and been abused. But I feel like it's got to be addressed, at least by me. I have the idea that this place is good for discussions and it probably won't turn...