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Thanks for starting this conversation. I remember, even back in school, I hated the fact the teacher always used both my first and last name--after she called everyone else by their first name only, when she did roll call. ( Shery. Sara. My First name, last name. Chuck. Steve. Judy.) Maybe it...

I have woken up from nightmares also. Shaking and having to get up just to shake it off. I have to look around the room and assure myself that it was a nightmare, and that I'm safe. Have you tried writing them down? This always gave me a chance to look at them later, so I could realize what...

I have 4 cats and one is very old. She has lost so much weight that we thought she was starting to get a cancer. We took her to the vet and they checked for any problems that could have caused this. $500 later, they still had not found out what was wrong. They wanted us to bring her back for...

Someone who loves me for who I am - not what I can do for them.

I've also avoided mirrors for most of my life. I still look in to it and see...no one. I'm just a face looking back - that needs to look better.

I can certainly understand your feelings now, with what your going thru. I just lost my mother, and am having problems dealing with her death. Her passing has certainly brought some new memories to the surface for me to deal with.

I have multiple people and places also. I know that I don't remember everything. I probably won't. There are a number of things that happen automatically when you get to the freeze/fight/flight stage in the experience. I know that I will only remember how much of it that I "need" to remember. I...

I wanted to also thank you, Gemberie. I have also been using my feelings of shame and sadness to help myself get these thoughts out of me. Like you, I often remember, realize and accept. Then I can grieve. After enough tears, the so called pain, seems to decrease. I go back and grieve at each...

I think you should ask yourself - how would this help me? You need to only do what would help you. You have been thru enough. So, unless more of this process will help you, you need to decide how much further you want to go. Sometimes all that is needed to just be heard. Once you had told your...

Like you- I was r***ed by multiple people, both family and strangers, in my childhood. So, I can certainly understand some of the feelings that you have with "feeling safe". A lot of people just look at me odd when I tell them that I have never felt "safe". I'm still not sure what would make me...

When I first realized that I had been hurt. One of the first things that I decided - and even told some people, is that I preferred to be called a "survivor" instead of a victim. No matter what the "officials" call you - remember that you can refer to yourself as anything you choose.

I asked her if we could have the meeting in the dark. I felt much more comfortable when I was crying.

Welcome to the forum, Trick. We're glad you found us. You're always welcome.

I have always thought thru a childhood song. I have a few that help me go to sleep. Ironically, most of my nightmares come in the morning hours. Go figure.

It took me a long time to realize it, but I miss the feeling of "being loved" and only for being me. I try to see that in any child I see. Someone who is just "being" and should be loved for it.

Have you tried writing a letter to "this child" ? I read an article about this once and as you continue to write and answer yourself, the handwriting changes to reveal how this "inner child" actually feels. Except, now, as the adult (also) you can tell the "child" what it needs to hear - exactly...

I saw this thread and thought this might be a place for me to start. Sorry if it's not. My mom passed away last month. We had the last memorial service for her last week. We have family out of the country, so we had the service late. Anyway, I sat there listening to all the people stepping up...

I know that I need to grieve. But, I can't find the feelings to do so. The last time I let myself "thru", I upset myself so badly that it put me in the hospital. I don't want to go back. It was horrifying. Now, I have to face one of the most stressful times ever. My mother is in hospice as of...

They put my mom into hospice yesterday. I went to the hospital a few times before she was moved. I knew that I would not address her on this issue, since my father is my abuser. I have a lot of anger at her for not protecting me. I don't know what I feel.... I know that she will pass away soon...

I think that a facial mask - like at the hospital -would be a very good way to get your point across. If it becomes an argument starter, tell them that your not feeling well and don't want them to get sick.

To be accepted for who I am.

I'm sorry that you feel like this. I read you note and can really symthasize with you. I fell last year on the ice and concrete! It even knocked me out for a few minutes. Like you, I went in for treatment and tests. Everything you can imagine. Even the one where they poke you with "multiple"...

I guess my number one is the sex. I also don't step up and defend myself. I hate loud noises because of my childhood. My family would yell at each other so much that one day I decided "I have had enough". I decided - inside - that I would rather lose then fight. I still, to this day have...

Welcome to the forum. And thank you for starting this discussion. I have also grown up with a lot of these feelings - or lack of. I was hurt at a very young age and by multiple people. It continued to happen as I grew older, both by family members and now by outsiders. Some strangers, some not...

Tell them that "he is someone that we will never forget". Then -if you can -stare at him, right in the eyes. So, he knows what you are truly saying to "him".