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I feel very sad today.

I actually have two things to mention. I'm not sure if they belong in this chat or not - but I wanted to mention them. I have always remembered the advice someone gave me about what to do when your angry at God. I was told that you should go to any lake or large watered area and just throw...

I"m so sorry that you went thru this. I can understand the humiliation of it. When I was in my 30's I listened to my mom telling a man I was dating that "she has been making this stuff up for years." She also told him "not to believe me."

When people have told me to just go ahead and process the memories - I have always told them it is like a bunch of scattered papers on the floor. I have to pick up each one, read it, and then I can file it in the file cabinet in the corner of "my room". I know that the paper is in there and that...

Welcome ! I'm sure you will find others here who share your pains. Keep up the good work !

I'm so sorry you're hurting. I, also have many layers of pain from my past. I hope you find hope and support here. Welcome.

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I have also had multiple people, multiple times for multiple years. It is very difficult to deal with these when there are so many. I tried to tell once and the family erupted at me. Then I was treated as an outcast and it felt like I was being traumatized all over again. I'm in my 50's now and...

Thank you for listening to my note Spinningmytires. I appreciate your note back. I think it is wonderful that you have found a T that you can work with. I have been going thru T after T for most of my life. The first ones I remember are when I was in early school. The T even talked to my...

Didn't you know that "you can't put anything on the internet that is not true?!!" (Pure joke!) I work for a trumper. He listens to the the talk radio stations from the moment he gets here to when he leaves late at night- and believes all of it! I was surprised he even got his shots. How sad. :(

I also have a hard time believing myself when something bothers me. I have very vivid memories of "him" saying to me "that doesn't hurt". To this day I still don't react much to being hurt physically. I just say 'ouch" then go on. Yet, inside I'm screaming. I commend any of you who have gotten...

Most of mine are just very uncomfortable feelings. It can take me days to figure out what exactly triggered it. But, once I do. It reassures me that I am able to handle it at this time. I have also found over the years, at least for me, is that once I have figured out what it was, (smell...

I went many years without any confirmation. Finally I went looking. Sometimes I wish I hadn't, but the proof for me is worth it. I wrote it all down so that I could go back to see it when I start misbelieving myself again. These days I don't need to. I have enough proof for me of all the...

I wish I could. I tried to once. I told the family and everyone got very angry at me. It was like being re-traumatized..... I don't talk to any family about it anymore. That was over 25 years ago. I even avoid the subject with my husband, even though he does know that something happened. I'm...

Since I was so young when "he" started, I just came to learn that pain down there is normal. I learned to tolerate it. To ignore it. I can remember sitting in my room on the floor in tears and just telling myself that "this is what life is". To this day, if I hurt - anywhere on or inside my...

I would never wish harm or sickness or pain on anyone - ever. After saying that...I want to ask how anyone else feels regarding "already being diagnosed" with PTSD and watching the world today. I know that the many, many deaths that have occured will generate more people with problems similar...

Welcome to the forum.

A lot of my "times" were when I was very young too. I can remember going down to the school office to ask for my "mommy" because I was having a "tummy ache". It took me many years to learn that those kind of feelings and descriptions are very common for children when they hurt emotionally. The...

I find that by watching it - or listening to something that reminds me of a an instance - makes me not only remember, but it helps me to face it head on. It also lets me take notice of how I'm feeling and then I try to figure out why or what caused these feelings. Sometimes I can figure it out...

Welcome to the forum !

I'm not sure if this helps - but most of my memories are from "up there" (floating by the ceiling, looking down) . Back in the 70's they diagnosed epilepsy. I was medicated all my life till I was diagnose with PTSD - since then I have had none of the systems or "feelings" that I had growing up...

Over the years, as I have recovered more memories (not the emotions though) I have started to understand why I am the way I am. It is amazing how much of "me" is based on what happened to me back then. I often wonder what or who I could have been if it had not happened - or if I had gotten the...

I have been seeing T since I was in grade school ! The one that I saw for the longest is still in practice ! I looked him up -- sure would like to tell him what was going on right before his eyes. Back then, in the 70's, he spoke to me for about 20 minutes, then talked to my parents for about...

Thank you sooo much for your words. You put into words for me what I have been thinking for quite a while and had not been able to put into words. Relief !! That it was not just "me" that had messed me up for all these years. "Not my fault" are words that I have to force myself to say - to...

I had been told for many years that my "mental condition" was due to me "not having it all together". I even heard my mother telling my boyfriend that I "made up stories". It was not till I was in the hospital and hooked to wires and machines that a doctor explained to me that PTSD is a...