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I only have a thick rippled skin in my lower back over my spine. But it's not dark. I have what looks like 'chicken skin' on my upper chest. My doctor had to laugh when he saw it. But I have no other unusual skin, no facial hair and nearly nething on my entire head, including my eye lashes and...

I think that some people cope with their isolation far better than others thus, their degree of discomfort would vary. So how did I get this isolated in the first place. Actually, I’ve felt my greatest discomfort in social situations where everyone else seemed to be socially engaged but not me...

I’ve also suffered from CSA. My recent blood tests reported that I have Lupus Anticoagulant Antibodies which cause my blood to clot too easily. So I’m taking blood thinners, likely for the rest of my life. I’ve never had Lupus, btw — yet, during my 20s and 30s, my PCP would often say, “If I...

I’ve lived completely alone for the past 20+ years and I wouldn’t wish this isolation on my worst enemy. I was living with my parents and younger sister before they suddenly died (auto accident and heart-attack). Unfortunately, I was never close to my abusive brother nor abusive half-sister...

As for auditory hallucinations, I’ve never heard voices — not human, animal nor other —that weren’t my own. What I have consciously hear a few times, had been a humming ‘motor like’ sound and once a continuous beeping sound within some dense woodlands. These I couldn’t explain. I once also...

I totally agree, we most certainly are what we've experienced in our past. There is no way to undo nor un-experience any of it either. I've often wondered how my life might have been different if I haven't had these experiences. And when I see a T who says 'this never happened to you' --...

Sometimes your T just won't know unless you recognize this abuse yourself and then tell them. Unless there had been physical evidence of childhood abuse they might never have known. My CSA by my father was always non-contact abuse. And because I grew up with his abuse, I thought his behavior was...

Sleep-paralysis runs in my family. Fortunately I seemed to grow out of it by my early 20s. And yes, it always begins with an intense thought of dread and always when drifting off to sleep. Then immediately the awful electricial tingling sensation begins in my head then slowly engulf my entire...

I've written quite a bit about my experiences over the past 20 years. This have greatly helped me to understand myself, even though, my T were only interested in the very basic stuff or from what they could retrieve from a questionnaire,. I received an assessment from a psychiatrist in early...

I never thought of this 'going through the motions' advice by my T as being abusive or not until you just mentioned it. But yes, it was most definitely abusive! Sometimes I would cry afterwards. I shouldn't have been seeing this man. He didn't love me. There has been no joy in our relationship...

Yes it does and I've seem several T over the past 50 years. Therapists also change their tune over the years.. You know the old saying, If you're trained to use a hammer everything begins to look like a nail. Therapy sometimes feels this as well --like I'm being attacked for thinking the way...

My first 4 years of therapy didn't get easier until I'd experienced one major and significant change at age 24. I'll try to explain. This shift in my thinking had occurred so suddenly and intensely that I'll never forgot it. Up to that point I had feared trusting this therapist. But during that...

(Sorry, I messed-up when posting my reply to Toren in this thread) I do dissociate yet, have never noticed myself having any hallucinations other than the time I once saw chickens floating across my ceiling about 50 years ago. As for auditory hallucinations, I’ve had none. The voices I hear...

Actually very few words had ever been spoken about sex or my past abuse during any of my therapies. I couldn’t talk either yet, my therapy was very helpful. Perhaps my T understood that I wouldn’t be able to talk openly about it and so, my therapist’s actions were more subliminal. So then, my T...

I think T sometimes make a quick assumption at the start of therapy then, look for the slightest symptom that fits their initial diagnosis. Some have even gone so far as to lead me by saying, 'Don't you feel this way or that way?' Me neither, although there were times when I felt like it...

Since age 20, I’ve seen eight therapists, plus a few others psychologists for assessments. Still, I suspect they haven’t found an accurate diagnosis. Perhaps this might help explain why I’ve had so many terminations. Here’s a brief overview. First T, psychiatrist, saw for 12 years, every 4...

i previously answered 'no, other' on this poll yet wanted to add a few more thoughts. Neither my doctors nor my T have understood all of my trauma experiences. This isn't their fault and I can't blame them. How could I explain something to them that I, myself, don't understand. Have these...

I can recall my brief, frightening sleep-paralysis hallucination of the 'black cat pounding on my chest' yet I hadn't perceived any tingling throughout my body during that experience. So, I'm wondering if this intense tingling sensation is common during these experiences. I'd only noticed my...

@bellbird I suspect you're describing a sleep-paralysis experience. Yes I've also had sleep-paralysis that seemed to begin with a very negative thought or frightening emotion while either drifting off to sleep or waking from sleep. My sudden intense fear, the feeling of a weight or pressure...

Thank you @ruborcoraxxx I'm glad that you understand what I was trying to explain and can appreciate these amazingly beautiful creatures, as I do!

PONIES! Yes! I've been crazy about them since age 4! From age 9 to 49, I kept two horses in my backyard where I cared for them nearly every day. I often enjoyed trail-riding them through the nearby woods. Nothing too fancy and yet they also saved my sanity. When around horses, I had to stay...

I've likely received a few assessments from age 20 to early 2019. Now my new T is apparently required to make another assessment. More recently, I've been giving several printed pages of my own written life history to my T. Yet one T told me that she wouldn't read my own written history because...

No. Other. My PCP doesn't understand my trauma experiences, even though, I've very briefly mentioned some of them to her (3 times?) over the past 20 years. During my last visit with her, a few months ago, she stated that she thinks I'm schizophrenic and living in denial of my schizophrenia. So...

I'm scheduled to see a new PhD next week. I've been out of therapy for well over a year now. But now I'm wondering if I should tell this new PhD about my unexplainable experiences. I had mentioned these experiences to all of my previous several therapists since my mid 20s -- Yet after telling...

@airdog Possibly adding another aspect to the sufferer's trauma and isolation could be that their friends and family might be withholding other personal information from them, as these friends and family members might fear their wrongdoings could be shared with the therapist. This...