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I've been "out of it" for many months. I kind of came back to myself about a week ago, funnily it was by seeing the cover of Hitchhiker's Guide (LOL), as I had begun to read it again quite some time ago, and then dissociated I guess. Seeing it made me feel like me again, and I've been...

To all of you who might still be around and somehow remember me, I'm back, kind of. I say kind of, as I've "come back to myself" so to speak, and I'm afraid of losing that (by triggering stuff). So I'm gonna have to be careful what I read at the moment, though I want to support others. I...

I made a big mistake. :banghead: I thought I was "cured" because my 3 year old fragmented part seemed to be gone. I think she is still gone, I don't think I can feel her, but I've been triggered tonight. That's the disappointing part - I was silly enough to think it wouldn't happen again, as...

I really want to post this for anyone else struggling with a dissociative part of themselves - I've noticed lately that @Echo @Hope4Now & @Bedbug have been going through a similar stage to what's been happening for me - and - I want you guys and anyone else with this problem to know that it can...

I've been struggling with this ever since this particular acute bout of PTSD erupted about 5 months ago. First it was because my flashbacks (inc body memories) occurred again, same nature as they always have, only this time the intrusive memories that came with them made me think continually...

I've been stuggling with my symptoms pretty bad for quite a while now, and I'm so sick of fighting the SI and everything else. It's been getting worse, and I'm barely coping. So, I finally gave in and saw my doctor, and he gave me a script for Zoloft (sertraline). I think I need the extra...

I finally got up the gumption to tell my mother about my PTSD, and about the likelihood that I've had it all my life. It took a lot of guts, as my family have always ignored or dismissed stuff that has happened to me, and I expected to not be believed. But I needed to do it, as I needed to...

Ok. I saw my T today after a month (she's been on holidays). While she's been away, a lot has happened, more stuff seems to be surfacing. My flashbacks are introducing new elements that weren't there before, like the sound of a zipper, a face. My nightmares are getting more and more specific...

Does anyone else have this? I've had it before, but never to this extent. I've been dreaming a lot lately, but don't know what I'm dreaming, just that there seems to be a lot going on in the dreams. Several nights ago I had flashbacks and nightmares all night. When that happens, I'm...

It has been a very bad evening. My husband was crazy angry and unreasonable with my son, who is struggling with anxiety and OCD badly at the moment - my husband sees it as behavioural problems, and takes our son's reactions personally. He takes everything personally. I started to get...

A while back, my T suggested "Homecoming" by John Bradshaw as being a helpful book - she called it "powerful". It took ages to arrive, and a lot happened in therapy between the suggestion and the arrival of the book (it took a month to get here!). I'm reading it, and got a couple of little...

I'm having a hard time after talking to my brother. He's the only one in my family that knows I have PTSD, and I haven't felt able to tell the others. My family has always had a bit of a "tradition" in minimising stuff that's happened to me, even life-threatening stuff. Not out of malice, but...

I see there was already a thread about this, but it didn't seem to answer my questions. I had EMDR 3 days ago, for the first time. I don't have a memory, but there is evidence to suggest I experienced CSA at about 3 or 4 years old. For quite a while, my mind wouldn't let me in so to speak...

Coming down from feeling overwhelmed. My husband, instead of giving me space when I desperately need to calm, instead goes on the attack and wonders why I react so much. I had experienced a fair bit of stress today, and finally managed, with the help of my son's psychologist, to convince him...

Had my first EMDR today. It didn't seem to be going to work for a while, it felt like my mind was "protecting" me, like there was a wall. There were some fleeting images, but no emotion attached, and then once some emotion, but on it's own. But - after a while, after she got me to start a...

I have debated very hard about posting this, and almost decided not to, but then I thought - well, I've got nothing to lose (I hope). I had another difficult session today, first one back after Christmas/New Year. I was supposed to have an EMDR session, but yesterday left messages for her that...

I've been struggling the last few weeks, the last two particularly. My husband who was finally supportive when I was diagnosed a few months ago, is no longer. He takes everything personally, even to the most innocuous of things. He read up on it and everything, but seems to think I should be...

I saw my T again today (8th session, seeing her weekly to fortnightly). I referred to something that I'd told her earlier on - probably the 2nd session, relating to events and flashbacks etc around what I think of as the "core" trauma. I don't remember an actual trauma itself, but I would have...

What on earth am I doing - I'm getting triggered constantly at the moment, and I'm messing up my kids. I feel like the worst, most miserable piece of worthless crud. How can I do this to my kids? My youngest (13) is inadvertently triggering me, and my husband gets angry and triggers me too...

My T is suggesting we start working on some of my strong triggers, such as dark windows with no window coverings. I know that probably sounds weird, but my flashbacks are always of someone intruding into my room through a dark window, and they are utterly terrifying. Due to these flashbacks...

I feel like crap, I've scared my family from having a stupid flashback again, one of the worst I've had. Madly hyperaroused today, woke up like that, then my husband and teenage son were at loggerheads. Men or man-sized angry voices, loud sudden noises, son yelling "I hate you" to his Dad, all...

Please tell me that there is an end to this - I cannot bear it at this intensity much longer. It takes nothing at all to push me over the edge into hell. I punch myself in the head, and the only reason it's not my face is that I don't want my kids to see bruises on my face. I think it's...

I am currently experiencing full-blown PTSD, which is mind-blowing for me. I've had flashbacks my whole life but as a child, didn't know what they were. As an adult either, but then finding out about PTSD as I got older, I didn't equate flashbacks with what I was having (even though there is a...

Hi everyone - I'm new to the forum. This is my first post. I'm still coming to terms with having PTSD, as I've had flashbacks all my life and just didn't know what to make of them, so I tried to pretend they didn't happen. I've found myself doing something different after telling my therapist...