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    Documentation of Overwhelmed Feeling

    I was in a good place and so I began school. I also work and o am a single mom. Then, a whole bunch of crap happened. Sick grandma got evicted, and I am the next of kin and had to help her. Then I was homeless and then I became overwhelmed. I felt the episode coming on. I had a bit of...
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    New Date, Existing Crush- Trigger

    I just began dating again. It's hard. I am learning a lot of new things about myself and how the PTSD has changed me. Emotions are harder to control/deal with.
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    Can you lose your soul? PTSD and emotional "reduction"

    PTSD is like a cancer of the psyche. As I read in so many replies, I have found that although I have changed, I am still me. As I heal, I learn about the new aspects of me, and how I relate to the world around me now, and how it differs from before. Sometimes, I can blend the old and new, and...
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    Scared to Medicate for Insomnia or Anxiety

    I used to be wary of medicating. Then, I tried some out for a year. I called the meds I was on my PTSD cocktail. I took 50mil. of zoloft a day, 200 of gabapentin (two pills a day, great, best stuff), and a very small dose of blood pressure meds at night. Best sleep ever. So, I got into a great...
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    DID Does anyone that dissociates, "see" other alters

    I disassociate a lot. There is only me, though. I usually feel very calm. Too calm. I also feel numb regarding empathy towards those around me. Usually, I am sensitive to people's feelings. I know I am disassociating when I lack my normal feelings towards or around people. Sometimes, if I am...
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    What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

    (living with PTSD 5+ years) Today, I am overwhelmed. I work, go to school, and am a single mom. My grandma got sick last month and evicted from her property. I had been living in my travel trailer on her property. I am homeless, again. Plus I have been helping move/sell all of grandma's things...
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    Love interest

    So, I got ghosted. He disappeared right after I wrote this. Wow. I have been upset but not like PTSD stuff, which is good. Normal ouch stuff. I never even told him about the PTSD.
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    Love interest

    I have a love interest after a spending couple of years happily single. I needed time to heal after the domestic violence. A few months ago, I realized that I had a crush on my co-worker. This made me very happy. I have not felt such feelings in a while. I am glad that I can feel this way. Since...
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    My bad decision

    I am a single mom. I left D.V two years ago. I was diagnosed with PTSD four years ago. I was homeless for half a year. A rapid re-housing program helped us get an apartment. For a year I spent 90% of my income on rent. I thought it wasn't worth it. So, I bought a travel trailer and struck a deal...
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    Dom Violence Why am i so terrified to leave?

    Yes. Go to a shelter in another town ———— It is good that your brother is helping you with your car. I left Idaho with my girls two years ago. It had taken four months for my plan to work, since my abuser would not let me be alone with both kids at the same time. I came to Cali and stayed with...
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    Ptsd, micromanagement, and me

    I quit my job Feb 2. I just walked out after leaving a note with my key taped to it. I left before telling off the new District Manager She is a micro-manager. Her management felt like abuse. My PTSD developed from domestic violence about 7 years ago. Working for a control freak is like being...
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    Abusive environment / how do you keep working?

    Hiya! Hope it is going better for you.
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    What Would Define Recovery For You?

    Peace of mind, and of soul.
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    Overwhelming Panic Attack

    Funny weird, not haha. My attorney advised me not to take a self-defense class. Due to pre meditated murder. My counselor advised against a self defense class due to "triggers". A year and a half later, I am considering taking a self defense class. Lack of funds have prevented me. I don't...
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    Depression, Safe Hatred, Suicidal Thoughts

    Ok. Breathe. Focus on breathing. Is there anything you do that can take yourself away from the horror? Binge watch t.v.? For me, when I am especially vulnerable, I baby myself. I nap. I eat a lot of ice cream. I cry for days and expect nothing more from myself than going to the bathroom. Because...
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    Depression, Safe Hatred, Suicidal Thoughts

    Consider yourself hugged from me!
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    To Date Or Not To Date?

    I have conflicting thoughts and feelings about dating. I would like to. I have. It is hard with two little kids. I think, to myself, "focus on your kiddos, not on Romance. Focus on healing yourself." Yet, I feel alone. I don't have the friend/partner I want. I see happy looking families, which I...
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    Suicide Feels Inevitable. Can Anyone Relate?

    I tried to commit suicide when I was 14. When I was 9, I had been counting the years until I could escape my family. I moved back and forth between my parents once or twice a year. It was one frying pan to another. There is something about the teenage years that makes one consider tomorrow as...
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    Dom Violence Does Anyone Ever Miss Their Abuser?

    I was isolated for many years. A hostage. My ex was the only one I interacted with. He always treated me like his enemy. It was strange to me to profess love for a person while creating a war with the beloved. And I do find myself missing "him". But really, I miss having a friend and partner in...
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    Grounding Techniques

    Hmm. The hiking helps me a lot. Hope you can regain that part of yourself. I lost writing. It went away for two years or more. The past week the writing has resurfaced. Yay!
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    Grounding Techniques

    I hike, if I can, and avoid "triggers". I treat myself, too. I try to be gentle with myself.
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    Suicide Feels Inevitable. Can Anyone Relate?

    Thank-you. He had grappled with the issue for most of his life. He was young, too. I still think of him as alive, though. I keep forgetting that it happened. Interesting story here: he had tried a year or so previously. At the time we both lived in a tiny town. We rarely spoke due to lifestyle...
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    Why Did The Abusive Ex...

    He is trying to screw with your head. There is also the above mentioned new way to make a prisoner. I often become upset at my ex because I feel like he broke my heart, mind, soul, and my dreams. I remind myself that I can heal this with time, now that he is not in my life. I then do something...
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    Suicide Feels Inevitable. Can Anyone Relate?

    My brother did right before Christmas 2015.
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    Suicide Feels Inevitable. Can Anyone Relate?

    Afraid of living. Yes. It is the feeling of loneliness that gets me. Of having to do it all by myself. Heal myself, raise good kids, after moving to another state and starting life all over again. It's odd. I got the PTSD three years into an abusive relationship. I seriously considered death for...
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