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What is the crisis line number? NHS direct?

Thank you so much @Confused Wingless... I always try to share. I get very dependant on being able to talk to people but find that its hard to speak to friends aboit this. I have mentioned it but I dont want to freak them out or use it against me when I am better . I do find it cathartic writing...

sorry... I meant @Solara xx

@solera. I have been refreshing the page all night in the hope of helpful messages. I have got lots of helpful messages but I must say that was a great response and I can not thank you enough.

Thanks @Hashi sorry for being bad tempered I am extremely sensitive and just desperate for help. I spoke to the therapist tonight and he is shocked that the phone service can't offer me anything and says he will look into other services like Mind charity to see if they can provide mental health...

I haven't been in therapy a long time @Hashi. I don't understand either. It feels like you think I have brought this on myself. I cannot help the way I feel and I would do anything to stop this feeling. If I could use the coping skills I would. I guess I just haven't learned any that work yet...

@Confused Wingless I REALLY appreciate the compassion and support. Thank you so much. It's great to know I am not the only one who feels like this.

@Hashi I don't know I'm very confused. It sounds ridiculous to not know what I am thinking but I find it hard to regulate thoughts. I think it's because the mental health phone services kind of persuaded me it was normal and just intrusive thoughts. The therapist took it very seriously. I don't...

@Hashi- thanks. He taught me how to think of a safe place after doing exercises. He has also taught me how to do thought records. He has told me to stop doing the exposure work for now and to focus on improving mood. I know fluoxetine can cause suicidality. I felt like this before I took it too...

Any hugs are much appreciated. Thank you @Tigger123 It's embarrassing too because I have a job due to start soon in which I'm meant to be a pillar of the community. I think starting work will help. But I'd rather be knocked out than do it. You know Michael Schumacher in a coma? Sorry to be...

Still confused @sarafina. Just posted in depression and suicide forum. :-( We share the police trigger. Today I was in a restaurant with a yellow glass panel around the windows. Every time a white car drove past- the yellow made it look like a police car in the corner of my eye. It didn't help...

This may seem like a really strange post. But just bare with me. I am so confused. My suicidal thoughts started peaking about 2 months ago. I have had them off and on but I would dismiss them quickly. Then they started to evolve in my mind as a possibility and I did not get upset by them...

I guess you got what you needed in the end. Hope you are ok Stenni xx

Hi @Notsowild thanks for the comment. I just feel really cross that I am traumatised by this. I am sick of feeling like this. I find driving myself ok- but being in other cars I find hard to deal with. Being a pedestrian I find hard to deal with too. Hearing sirens, seeing police cars and...

@sarafina thanks for your concern. I'm not actively suicidal. I do have the means to do it but I would not do it. These are thoughts which plagued me a few weeks ago. Out of desperation I went on fluoxetine. I've amazingly felt better. However- was a bit paranoid that I was being duped because I...

Can you just explain this in laymans terms? I find it hard to understand stuff. I am trying to be nice to myself. I went for coffee afterwards as a treat. I just feel really really down and alone now. I guess I am just really disappointed that I don't feel better. I am in impatient and cross...

Well I was supposed to be doing exposure therapy where you speak about it every day. But lost faith with my therapist a bit-after he didnt turn up last week. So decided to take matters into my own hands. Also have never had any kind of emotional reaction to it when at home- but cant talk about...

After a long time of thinking about it- I finally went to my accident site today. Sat in the car for an hour. Frozen. Then finally woke up and got out of the car. Didn't dare walk right near it, just looked from a distance. Then stood near it for about an hour. Not really much of a reaction...

Thanks for repling @joeylittle . It is a terrible feeling. Especially as I now feel like there is no point in the therapy. I refuse to do those stupid painful exercises because now I just feel like actually he doesn't care a less if I do them anyway. I'd rather just forget about the whole...

My therapist didnt turn up last night. My appointment was at 5pm. I waited in the waiting room until 5.50pm with the receptionist also non the wiser. I text to find out where he was. Eventually at about 6.30 he text to say he was on holiday. Apparently he had arranged that with me the week...

I wondered about writing it down. But I feel like the bits I've been able to say are already 'rehearsed' like I'm saying a script. So it doesn't seem to work. Its just that the things I get flashbacks with are the tiny minor things like conversations and little actions which all took place in...

Hi- Just thought I would consult you guys again. I wrote a list of a few of my concentration problems last week and read them out to therapist. He says it all sounds like dissociation. Wanted me to do a questionannire but didnt have one with him so I guess I will do that when I see him next...

ok. thanks for your help- interesting to get your input, especially about why I get distressed in the therapy and why I don't at home. I've discovered that I do dissociate although I didn't realise the extent or what was what so maybe that is what it is. Both therapists I have been offered are...

In therapy- I get very distressed. For talking about less than I have tried on my own. I don't know maybe it is because thereapist asks the questions and it's harder to avoid them? I'm not sure. Doing this talking to myself thing- I just physically seem unable to progress to the next point. I...

it just sounds like a big mess and you shouldn't have to put up with all of it.