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You're welcome. I remember having the same feeling and also thinking wow, why aren't we talking about this more! I often felt like I didn't fit PTSD because it's not often I'm in fight or flight but I have a better understanding now. Im glad I was able to offer something valuable to you.

This happens to me regularly. The worst situations are when I'm walking with my eyes shut and I don't realise. That's rare though, most times my mind slows down, my eyes close and I slowly fall towards the ground and then sometimes can't move or speak. I think this is the 'flop response' as...

I'm following with great interest as I'm really struggling with parts acting out. I don't have much in the way of communication. I think I'm unwell but I'm not sure. I've just ordered the book by Janina Fisher and hope it will improve my situation.

I've only ever had one visual flashback and I still couldn't make sense of it. I have so little memory from the years in question that I assume my brain is still hiding them from me but is less adapted to keeping other sensory input from me so that's what I experience. I still feel weird calling...

I feel like I'm making progressing more in recent years, I've started yoga and used to be in a choir pre covid. I found the quality of my breath has changed considerably and my core is stronger so I feel more supported internally. Learning to be in my body has been hard work as I used to have an...

I'm afraid I haven't read all the posts above as I'm having trouble concentrating but hopefully this makes sense. For me the thing I most took away from radical acceptance was "acceptance does not mean approval". I tend to deny my own experience and listen to my inner critic because they dont...

Your opening post move to tears. I'm having a difficult day and feel like you expressed some of the feelings and experiences that I have found so difficult to express. Thank you for sharing so beautifully. I do not have Did, but do dissociate often, heavy head, eyes closing, losing any sense of...

I've found recently that in therapy when I'm talking and explaining, I feel I have to stop speaking mid-sentence. It's usually when I'm getting angry and so I just assumed I was afraid of my anger but I've since realised I do it at other times. I think I've come to realise that I'm not scared...

I do this as well. I laugh when I try and speak and garbage falls out of my mouth and I also laugh when it looks like I've just fallen asleep or can't move my arms. I think I'm mostly laughing at the absurdity of it all. It's hard to describe but it does feel like I'm laughing at a reaction that...

I think my experience is somewhere in between. I lose all muscle strength so hit the floor or slouch. I'm conscious enough to be able to hear but can't open my eyes or move. It's like I'm living in a small box in the back of my head. It feels safer there I suppose. It can take anything from a...

Thank you so much for your post. It really touched me and I relate to a lot of what you say. I'm really sorry that you had those experiences. You speak with some patience and self compassion and it's instilled a little of that in me too so thank you. I think I'm nearing the point where I'm...

I can relate to the shallow breathing, at times my eyes start closing like I'm falling asleep. I also get numbness, tickling, lack of sensation and pain. I can also feel nauseous. The shallow breathing I would guess is a way of slowing your system down so you can't be heard/seen so you are...

Thank you both for sharing your experiences. The dissociation has happened in therapy but it's not really over anything particularly difficult to deal with. Once it was because I was remembering lying on the bed naked after my (ex)boyfriend ripped the duvet off of me because I wasn't up when...

I'm not really sure where to put this but I hope someone can relate. At times my body just loses all stamina, my arms fall by my side and I get kind of spacy. I don't really know what to call it, sometimes my eyes shut other times they are open, it's like half passing out. I also have a...

I cycle between shutdown (depression, numb, empty, still, on auto pilot, disconnected) and high agitation (anger, anxiety, restless, on edge, tearful). My therapist explained that if you come down from shutdown you often get more agitated (more energy) and then you come down from agitation into...

I've had this before and also a stutter at times. Usually it's during or after a flashback and I keep trying to speak and garbage just falls out. I find it kinda funny now but when it first started happening I was terrified but I've learnt a bit more about the brain and trauma. There was one...

I really feel like I have experienced this too. It progressed to a thought of "oh this reminds me of.." but I don't finish the thought because my brain shuts down whatever communication was about to happen. The creeping feeling of the past and present coalescing is uncomfortable and I often get...

Thank you all. I'm really struggling today with my memory and concentration so I will catch up over the weekend hopefully. I drafted what I wanted to say to my therapist and then the next day. I woke up with the thought "did I have to adjust my trousers when I left?", "Would that help me know?"...

Thank you all for your comments. I know on intellectual level that it doesn't matter if it happened or not but I guess that feels like an "easy out". It's how I feel about the domestic abuse when I feel so much guilt for being flawed and being mentally unwell. I know that I would never suggest...

I feel so awful writing this. I've wrestled with it every four years or so and end up restricting or in hospital. My memory of it is still not clear. I think someone tried to assault me in my sleep. I woke up and they seemed to be asleep and grunted when I said if they tried it again I would...

I'm not really sure. I think it was trying things together. I've been looking at the SIBAM model and I think I introduced an element of meaning in a way that I hadn't allowed myself to acknowledge. I don't think this would have happened without therapy as it was always much easier to blame...

I rarely have visual flashbacks but have quite a few somatic ones. There is one I get probably at least a couple of times a day. I haven't raised the specific memory I think this relates to yet in therapy so maybe that will help. The therapy I'm in is Somatic Experiencing and we have worked on...

I'm having this a lot right now. It's incredibly frustrating and upsetting. I try and be patient with myself. I've had a few memories that were coming and going and then at some point I felt them differently and they sort of stayed. I think it's part of the process but a deeply unsettling part.

Hi, I have this too. I've found having music on in the shower stops my mind from wondering. I also have a very strict policy about my partner not entering the bathroom (we don't have a lock). There are still sometimes when it happens but much less now.

I managed to scare myself when doing the dishes earlier the week. I'd had therapy that day and the sudden noise just threw me. I was stuck frozen with a washing up bowl in one hand and a dish in the other. I could speak but it was just garbage coming out. My mind came back to the present and I...