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I appreciate it :) It was a big horrible learning curve, but it taught me a lot - and I probably *had* to learn some of that stuff, in the end. (Even if I wouldn't have volunteered for it!)

Just writing this as a general reply to others also - Thank you for your thoughts! :) Yeah... I have no idea if she's a narcissist or a BPD sufferer or a CPTSD-only sufferer or any number of any other things. It has been helpful to read posts from CPTSD sufferers who've said: "Erm... no -...

Hey Jade, thanks for your message! Yeah - we first connected a couple of years ago, then lost contact. We were messaging for about six months, properly together for about six months, then dancing around each other post-breakup for about six months. But the main bulk of actually 'being...

Sorry to hear things have been so hard! If it helps - here's a quick update from me: I did still struggle a little after writing my last post. I went back to her city for a course I'm studying, and the course covered things which were quite relevant to her story (and also to the story of our...

Thank you - I really value and appreciate it :) Yeah, I reckon I feel able to move forward now 😊

Yeah, thank you - I've found your posts really helpful! I was saying to someone earlier today: I think when I'm just at the point of letting go fully, I'm finding myself doing one last little check on how things were left. It never fully sat right that we couldn't find a way to end things more...

Thanks for your thoughts! I have to say, I'm surprised by the kind of... clear cut... view that a number of the posts have on this subject. For me, it's felt greyer, and less certain. That might partly be because - on the internet - no one knows me, the girl or the deeper specifics of the...

That's a really nice way to put it. You hit on exactly what I've been chewing over. And there's a lot of wisdom in your post too, I think. This here - I think you're right, you know. Probably I am overstating my own influence, and probably I am trying to predict the unpredictable. Firstly...

Well, yeah - true. It's just a bit messy all round - I feel it probably *was* a harsh conclusion to end with her being cut off etc, and I'm not entirely comfortable with it. But I also get it, because her behaviour was super confusing and it felt really hurtful at the time. I won't go back...

Aye, okay - I hear you! At the end of your post there - that comment "Bringing back a poor time in both of our lives will hurt." - part of me wants to say "Gah, yeah but... things can be straightened out that way, maybe!" But perhaps I also need to let go of a sense that things need to be...

Yeah, true. And she can always get in touch with me too, if I just take my hands completely off of the situation in every sense, and move completely forward. I don't think she would... she seemed to find it very hard to apologise for anything, and very hard to do anything which would risk...

Yeah, perhaps you're right. This isn't exactly how I'd characterise the idea - it's more like: "Now the dust has completely settled; I don't feel 100% comfortable with how things imploded, and it'd be nice all round to just... affirm that there's no deep, dark, hard feelings anywhere" - it...

Weeelll - yes and no - she did end things, but then wanted to start things back up again (and I said I didn't feel we'd sorted things out enough yet). We were then friends, but she often fluctuated between "I'm really working on myself, and I want to be with you", (which always got my hopes up)...

Yeah, I think you've articulated that really well. I don't know... perhaps it is more about my feelings than anything else. The thing is... I'm so aware that CPTSD is an actual, clinical diagnosis - and I want to be respectful of that, and behave responsibly. I don't have it CPTSD. So I'll be...

Yeah, perhaps you're right. Maybe I do just need to focus on myself and move forward. I'm not sure if I've articulated myself clearly or not here, so just to clarify with a different question - Is there anything actually harmful about cutting someone off who has CPTSD, when they're still...

Thank you! :) Aye, true - maybe I am just ruminating; and perhaps I'm thinking of the worst case scenarios here. You're right too, people can only heal and help themselves. I guess I was wondering if I could be helpful in removing a potential stumbling block for her - she used to spiral into...

Yeah, I guess so! When I was talking about healing, I guess I was thinking in terms of her wider CPTSD healing journey. My memory of her is of someone who often seemed very vulnerable - it didn't seem to take much to push her into a really emotional, dysregulated space where the whole world...

Hey everyone! I guess most people here will vaguely remember my relationship with a girl who has C-PTSD (and possibly other conditions as well). As a quick recap: we were together from June 2023 - January 2024; and then on/off until June 2024. She behaved quite abusively at times, the...

Makes perfect sense - thanks for the reply!

Thanks, I'll take a look!

Thanks for the reply guys :) I guess as I reflect on psychological terminology etc (I'm studying a relevant subject area at the moment - which doesn't make me *any* kind of expert, but is giving me room to think on the subject a bit); I'm increasingly feeling like people have 'models' of...

And actually - in my country, we might say “Don’t wind me up about that situation - you’ll give me a compex!” meaning like - a psychological condition relating to nervousness or whatever…

Hi everyone :) I was reading a psychology book today - unrelated to CPTSD. It defined the psychological term 'Complex' as "an organic network of compulsive attitudes beliefs and behaviors" Is this was the 'Complex' in CPTSD refers to? I just thought it meant 'complicated'!! 🙈

Yeah, you're right - there's probably a little mixture of things going on. I have a couple of family members who live an hour outside of that city, and I do really like it. I also feel like I've spent a bit too long living in my hometown, and my urge for adventure is kind of strong. But it's...

Aye, I appreciate your take on that! Yeah - I'm not sure what's the right thing here - part of me wants to just say: "Hell, snap out of it, pull yourself together and get your ass back out there!" But I also don't want to pretend it didn't happen and then be 'ignoring' it for the next year...