Recent content by Bigblue

Hello @tlc . Thanks for writing. I also often read other people's posts and wonder if we are talking about the same person or not... Now that I have been no contact for 6 weeks things are clearer to me. I am sure this was or is also very hard for him. If what he told me about his feelings...

When I read about other posters I usually wonder what happened if there is no update. UPDATE: 4-5 days after I posted here, I asked him for a phone call to talk about things. And although he made it clear with actions that he wasn't willing to put the effort, I still asked him if he wanted to...

Thank you @Sweetpea76 and @Snowflakes. I am taking care of me, as I am spending time with friends and went to get my hair done etc today. Thanks for reminding me again to take care of myself. I know it is very important and we cannot remind ourselves enough. It is very hard to understand where...

Hello it's me again to report back. For the past 2 weeks I have been trying something new. I have been trying to avoid finger pointing and became softer towards our relationship. In most relationships I only act when the other person acts. If they text, I text. If they don't respond, I stop. If...

@Snowflakes great to hear that you guys are taking positive steps. Also great to hear that there is hope. I really hope we can break the cycle. :)

Sorry to hear you are going through this. My partner and I can't even successfully manage a relationship, I don't know what it would be like to live in the same house. Understanding mental illness is hard. Actually I think anxiety type illnesses are still not understood well. I don't have PTSD...

Thank you soo much @Snowflakes. One of my issues that I cannot get over is the effort he puts in to be with me. The problem is when he is distant and isolating how do supporters process this? I automatically think he is not putting the effort and don't contact him. But when we speak he says he...

I don't know about the level of your gf's abuse but I also was abused as a child. I was much younger, but my abuser didn't live in the same house. I told my Mom about it after 3 years (because usually abusers threaten you and as a child who trusts a parent figure you listen and keep silent)...

I am here again :) After reading the forums, articles etc. I decided I wasn't at a place in my life where I could support someone with PTSD sufficiently. My partner distanced himself and dissappeared anyway. I started dating... ahhh the world of dating. It made me miss my PTSD partner more...

Attraction is a tricky thing. Our unconcious mind selects or rejects partners through our point system. We usually say, "I know if I like someone or not"... It is there or not... And usually our "attraction radar" is not very correct. Especially if you have a history of selecting people who are...

Can't tell if it is PTSD or him just being a player? I don't feel that he is and I am experienced. But how would one know, it is a new relationship and I am almost 100% sure he is being very effected by PTSD at certain times... and he tries to hide it from me. During our 1st argument when I...

@missy meier ... If you mean "in the mood" for sex, no... This is how it happenned both times when we broke up without breaking up. -I usually let him initiate -we text about regular things, letting each other know how our day is. Sharing images (things we joke about, we both love the ocean...

First of all, it's great to post on these boards as I have found so many things I can relate to for the past 4-5 weeks. Like most people on here, my relationship started with a high school friend this year. We were infatuated pretty quickly. And I knew it wasn't real love. We are in our 40s. He...

It's very hard to make a comment on a relationship that we only read a few minutes on. If she has been diagnosed with BPD then as you know the disorder causes issues with being able to control emotions. There is also a lot of unconcious "projection" stemming from fear of abandonment. The...

Hello @Lucycat... Thank you for your message. We had contact today. I reached out to him after a month. I sent him a text... We had light hearted conversation. He mentioned that he contacted me 2 weeks ago. But I didn't get the message. It might be true because it was through an app and I had...