Recent content by Bookreader68

Yes. I feel ashamed talking about my childhood abuse. I also feel guilty, like I deserved it. I felt like such a scapegoat among my family members. My father, my aunt, my grandmother, my sublings, and at school. It just was so hard and always wondered why I was treated that way.

Hi, I have read your response. I have read both books and continue reading more. I loved both books. I know the responses I have gotten really put me into deep thought about my abuse. There's a part of me that knows what happened was wrong but I think there has been alot of contributing...

Hi, I often wondered if other codas had the same problem as I did. But I guess not. I have often felt as if I was alone in this. I wonder if it's a generational thing. Parents born in the 1927 and 1930. My paternal grandmother and grandfather lived next door but it was chaotic with...

Thank you for your input and your assurances. It is all new to me and I am just trying to sort through it. Peace and Joy! Coda66

I think they are repressed emotions since it seems to center mostly around fear, anxiety, and feeling lost. Uggg! Hate nightmares!

There are times when I have nightmares about my childhood home. I dream that I am extremely angry at someone in my home, or I am am scared of something bad happening, or there is someone trying to hurt me. I also have nightmares where I am somewhere and it is dark, scary, I can't find my way...

Truth to what you've said! Amen! Amen! Amen!

Hello Ms. White, Thank you for your insight. I feel better at understanding my conflict with loving and hating. So, I am going to give myself permission to be hurt and angry, because I do feel that. Especially I angry at my father. He is 93 yrs. old with dementia and I am caring for him...

Hello, I have decided to join a peer support group about child abuse. In reading the material and answering questions the one thing that keeps popping up in my head is, " They didn't know better because they were deaf and didn't receive information like they should have. So they went with...

Hi Arfie, It is confusing as to what I missed. Growing up in my house was for me, with all the responsibilities I had, is what I thought everyone else did too. It's not till I became a teenager that what was happening was not normal. I am grateful to know I am not alone. Take care...

Hello, Thank you so much for explaining childhood losses. For me not knowing what I was missing was hard for me to explain. I so do appreciate your help and your quick response. I will definitely keep this and also check out the forums.

I am looking for information regarding a possible list for childhood losses =what? I grew up the oldest hearing child with Deaf parents and siblings. I was given a lot of responsibilities that I was not prepared for. I was abused by my Father physically and emotionally. I was abused...

The part of waiting for death for all the pain to be over is a feeling I experience sometimes when I am hurting. But when the pain lessens I look for glimmers in my day. The glimmers of something good. Like my cat Buffy, she brings me joy! A good boom! Hot coffee in the morning. Nature. I know...

Potato 🥔