Recent content by lonelyone82

Thank you. I will try my best to continue on and get proper help for the abuse. It's hard living with the memories and feeling so alone all of the time. I will find some proper help.

I was raped by my Dad when I was 16. It was horrible. This may be to graphic for some people to read, but he used a spiked sadistic sex toy on me while raping me. He also made my mom watch what he was doing to me. I later found out that he raped my mom all the time and used the sex toy on her...

I feel for you Sunset. I understand what you are talking about. I have dealt with the public mental health system, and private therapy is where I feel safe. The public system for me was a disaster. I felt so abused by them and deceived. They enabled sex crimes against me too, by conversing with...

Hugs are always good.

Thanks. I think it's going okay. I am readjusting to it and am using distractions. Last night I was praying and it seemed to lighten. It's not replaying at a constant, and I am adjusting to it. In the past I had floods of recovered memories and flashbacks that were worse and ended up finding it...

I haven't posted on here in a while. I have been getting in shape doing yoga 6x a week and therapy 2× a week. A few days ago I recovered a memory I had stored in my mind and it involved a hospital experience. I got really traumatized and my nervous system shut down because it was so overwhelmed...

I am doing the same thing right now. I understand your frustration. I woke up at 4 today and was alert. I then got up at 8 after laying there upset about not sleeping enough yet another night. Sometimes I can fall back asleep but it's rare. I found some yoga poses to do from prevention magazine...

I bought Iron today after my workout. I am going to take two 100mg pills for a while. I got them at the pharmacy so I know the brand is reputable. :) Hoping to get some energies back. I'm not sure but I think it has been making me depressed because feeling so tired all of the time and slow might...

@Freedomfighter Oh, my heart goes out to you. I'm so sorry you had to go through that. You didn't deserve any of that and it's all so unfair. I felt so isolated and alone sometimes. I am going to work through things doing therapy. It still gets hard.. I'm sorry your mom was controlled too and...

Thank you.

Hmm. This just caught me off guard. I just had my iron levels tested and the ferritin was at 7ug/L. It showed that it should be at least 15ug/L, which I think is low. I have been sleeping poorly. I am going to buy some iron pills tomorrow and keep on them for a while. I started vitamin D a few...

I have been waking up at after about four hours of sleep with my mind driving me nuts. I have been having strange dreams and then usually wake up to a flashback. One morning I woke up reliving the dream I had. I usually feel totally trashed after not getting back to sleep and struggle through...

Sorry about your situation. It would trigger a lot of anxiety and stress to not have that support anymore. It also is upsetting because of the fact it's a reminder of the financial aspect of her help rather than someone genuinely caring. They are both upsetting and your reactions are normal. I...

I have quit too. It took me a while to find someone supportive. I was nervous the first time to quit when things were not going well. It was more of a fixing situation than a supportive therapist and it was becoming stressful. I called her office and left a voice message. She offered me a free...

I was abused and made to feel as if it was because of something I did and who I was. I also got cornered and made to feel helpless about it without a way out. The abuser needed a way to feel dominant and powerful over something and it happened by chance to be me. It is their sickness. The...