Recent content by Silent Walker

I do not know what to say, but I want to say something. I want to work on my diary. I am currently working hard on myself, physically and mentally. I train everyday, and I study physics, which is one of my great interests. I see my therapist once a week, and I also participate in group...

I developed a new side of myself this last year. The anger. It helps me a lot in getting better, in allievating confusion and dissociation. But it also brings along new and scary thoughts. Revenge, thoughts of hurting other people. I dont want to become what I have feared my whole life, the...

I Opened up about most of what's happened to me with my T, including the sexual stuff. No details about that though, Just general speaking. Does it help to speak about the incidents in more detail maybe? It feels... So impossible. But what I learned is That what I dont want to speak about, is...

Thanks for kind words @somerandomguy, its always nice. I`m so tired of being invisible, and now I got this rage that is building up in me. Revenge thoughts. It represents the opposite of who I used to be. I guess this part of me has awoken after my mum passed away this year...

When I was young, I was scared. I didn`t have a place where I could be myself, a place where I could fail, a place where I could try. A place where I could develop and grow. I hid. I hid from the world so it couldn`t hurt me, if I was not present, then I was indestructible. The person that was...

I struggle a lot lately. I used to be a depersonalization sufferer, having it chronically for 8 years. I managed to fight my way out of it in 2012, and my life started to slowly get better. Sadly, I mainly did superficial stuff which did not include working with my childhood. Even so, I created...

Thanks for all the quick and insightful answers! There is much truth to the statement:" Doesnt matter wheter it can be classified as abuse or not, its how it has affected you that matter". I remember feeling like a victim, and frozen in state, so I guess thats a big indicator for that. The...

I want to first describe shortly my general childhood situation before I actually go on to the specific topic that I am thoroughly confused about. I grew up with an alcholic father, and enabler mum. The family atmosphere was one filled with conflict. If there were days without fights in my...