Recent content by white hyacinth

Everywhere I go I am abused. Sexually, physically, emotionally, psychologically, verbally; by my parents, the rest of my family, by my "friends", by peers, by authority, by mental health professionals, and even by people on this website who supposedly have been through similar abuse and should...

When you are depressed, you’re expected to reach out for help. So that’s what I did: I went to several therapists over the years who specialize in trauma and PTSD (group and individual), I've gone through so-called "evidence based" treatment, I probably tried at least 7 different medications, I...

I've grown a lot in the past few years, and I've realized a lot of hard truths about the world. I've always been honest enough with myself to see the world for how it truly is, even while others continue to lie to themselves and others. One thing I've realized is that this thing we call "PTSD"...

Are you f*cking kidding me? Recognizing and identifying my parents as one of the many sources of my trauma and PTSD is a necessary step in recovering from my childhood. That's a hell of a lot different from unwarranted "blaming", as you so carelessly put it. Yet according to you that won't get...

I thought I was the only one who got this! I've had quite a few times where I couldn't remember a flashback immediately after it happened. You know you had a flashback but you don't remember anything that happened in it, pretty much exactly how you described it. Almost like it never happened...

I will be seeing a psychiatrist in January (earliest appointment I could get) so hopefully they can prescribe something then. I will now.

I'm sorry that happened. That level of trauma is unmatched by most. Thanks for the inbox.

So my anxiety/panic is pretty bad. My "resting" or sitting heart rate is pretty high for my age. The last 3 times I went to the doctor my sitting heart rate was 123, 115, and 127. My chest hurts a lot of the time, especially at the end of the day. By the end of the day, especially if I'm sleep...

I have a bunch of other appointments lined up already

Yeah, I've been thinking about doing an IOP.

It's not, I go to therapy twice a week, because there are so many things to cover. It's not that simple. Maybe I have mislead you. I'm not just sitting around complaining. I don't know why you make this assumption. I'm trying to do what little I can to get better, even though it has proven to...

I've thought about looking into a GED program, but I want to get back on meds first right now because I am barely functioning enough to do everyday stuff sometimes. After I left regular school I did online school for awhile but that fell apart.

I'm 18 and still live with my parents. I so want to get away from them but I can't. My mental health deteriorated to the point where I dropped out of school in 9th grade so I'm dependent on them for everything. They are part of the reason I'm like this, (depressed, suicidal, anxious...

Yeah that makes sense. Sometimes the sleep paralysis hallucinations I get are loosely related to trauma in some way. I saw a sleep specialist a few weeks ago about the twitching and spasming in my legs that goes on at night, and have an appointment at a sleep study lab soon.