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wow just wow i am so impressed with Jellybean tonight. I went to meet the lady who found my Medical USB card that had gotten ripped off of Jellybean's vest. Well I did not know there was a football game today so the train was packed. I mean there were people cm away from stepping on her and she...

Well today was a big day for me after 8 years of being out of the work force i went to Employabilities. They will help me to get ready for a job as well as talk to employers about my disability. I will be only working Part Time when I find a job. While i was doing my interview (what i need, what...

The lady who i got her from was calling her Flower like the skunk in Bambie because of her blaze. LOL my kids won and named her Jellybean and at times she is a jumping Jellybean. I never stop being amazed at the power animals have. Jellybean started on her own i might add when she senses i am...

oh i did not participate in this madness only read about it. My Jellybean is a kuvasz, Maremma Sheepdog, Australian Shepard mix(lol try say that 10 times fast) Currently Jellybean is 6 months almost 7. OMG she has been a savior for me.

I spent some cuddle time with my Service Dog. She helped to calm me down. I just laid down with her on the floor

I was reading a post in a group I am in on Facebook and it upset me. This guy was going off on people and saying that PTSD is only military and we civilians can not possibly get PTSD. The more people tried to reason with this guy the more hostile he got. He told everyone who is a civilian that...

"Look to this day, for it is life. The very life of life. Within its brief span, lies all the verities and realities of your existence. The bliss of growth. The glory of action. The splendor of beauty. For yesterday is but a dream and tomorrow is but a vision. But, today well lived makes every...

I get extremely anxious if I am confronted with certain topics. The other day a woman i had met a few times on the public transit was nit picking my Service Dog in training. I am new to training a dog let alone a service dog. I was ok at first but the more she nit picked and making comments...

yep i got that too. I was told because they had no "paper trail" it did not happen. Ummm i was in the middle of nowhere he made sure I did not have a working car. Often we did not have a working phone and the closest neighbor was 2 miles away in any direction. How was I to report anything?He had...

It is so sad. It breaks my heart to see and hear what my kids are going through. I will say at least they are at an age they know what is right and wrong. I told my oldest for now that when he reaches 16 if he wants to "run away" from his dad's the cops do not care and would not bring him back

I am on the verge of tears right now. I am at a lose on what more i can do. About 4-5 years ago CPS took my kids when i had requested help and was at a low point in my life. I have 3 special needs boys who are 15,14,12 now. I was caring for their needs but neglecting mine. Once in the system and...

I wish I could avoid my abusers but I share custody with my ex. The kids are not safe but as I said cps refuses to see they are in danger. Their dad is not taking them to therapy he does not believe there is anything wrong. I am working with my new family Dr and my Therapist on the sleep issue

It has taken me a few days to be able to write about this. Sorry ahead of time for the confusing rant trying to make sense of things. I was trying to sort out why, what is the trigger but I can not seems to pin point why the nightmares are back. I have a rough time sleeping as it is. If it is...

I had to wait to write about this I was so worked up i waited until I was calmer . Yesterday I had to get my youngest son's mediation from his dad's house. I have difficulty being around this man as he is my abusive ex and is a huge trigger for me. I might add so is my ex's dad. My fiance is...

I want to get away from working in fast food i was thinking of a job something like working at the SPCA. I know if I have an office job with the SPCA i can bring my service dog

I am still in shock and disbelief. Hearing of Robin Williams' death was hard but to hear the details has been a huge trigger for me. I have become obsessed on finding more details. I check for new details many times a day. I know the way he died has hit home for me harder then I thought it...

Thank you so much everyone. I am so glad i have found this forum. There are some friends who do not know how to handle me when am not doing well. They make uninformed insensitive comments.

today was a rough day and here is an example of why I need Miss Jellybean. Today i had a meltdown the stress of the past few months finally got to me. The bedbug ordeal, the court stuff, health issues.not sleeping well,the many tests I have had done, among some other situations. Well today...

I know this for selfish reasons he knows I have limitations. He knows I struggle not with my PTSD but I have mobility issues too. So to get this I do not appreciate at all. To my face he will all understand then behind my back he sends emails and texts like this

I am so triggered right now and angry. When things are not going the way my brother wants it go he writes horrible emails or texts. Often using a guilt trip to get his mission across. My dad and I have never been close in fact he is one of my abusers. He also is so focused on my brother he...

It has been a while since I posted anything. My world is so upside down right now. I have had a few situation happen that were beyond my control. My therapist who I have not seen in 3 weeks is now on an extended leave of absence til Sept. I was suppose to have an appointment with him 3 weeks ago...

What I emailed my mom and brother. Friendly reminder I am asking anyone who would like myself or the kids to do things with you to give me details. If the date is in the future that is fine but I need to know date, time, location. I might have plans so if you do not give me these details that...

Thank you . :)

My mom just called and she talked to him . OMFG he was not the douchbag he normally is he did not give her the same BS he did for me. YAY it has been sorted. I reminded my mom I need structure the "relaxed" timeline actually is a huge trigger for me. She was more understanding today.

I am on the verge of tears. A happy event is turning out not to be so happy and it has not happened yet. On Sunday my niece, nephew and their adoptive family are coming in from out of town. I have not seen them in 5 years.My niece and nephew want to see my kids. Huge problem my abusive ex who...