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Yes. My mom has her own health troubles and I don't ever remember her without depression or something going wrong and us having to compensate for it. We are not close because discussions made her tired so we just never really talked. Shes the one that my dad has to protect from getting too...

I used to read loads and loads, it wasnt just a hobby, it was me being me. Now I find myself intimidated by large chunks of text, especially any kind of paperwork. I think its because I used to skim read, but now I can't do anything but, but now not alot retains.

I feel alot of hurt over it, resentment because I had pre-trauma, but treated like a normal kid....some of which was worse because I was (am) talented, so its normal for me to be pushed. I was very lonely and very confused about how to feel and how to relate to kids who were being happy as...

I have trauma from being born by ceserean at 29 weeks, then lived in an incubator for months with sepsis of the blood.

This isn't an awkward question, I've experienced the same thing the past year.

it feels good that someone validates what i struggle to put into words. what seems beyond just depression and feeling you have been inserted into a human body that has also seemed to be programmed on self-destruction and you are frozen out of those command controls. for ages i could not shake...

I am wondering if someone can relate. I am somewhere on the dissociation scale...and only at the beginning of finding out that dissociation is a real state of mind and that there are valid reasons as to why I've felt this way all my life. I do have a distant memory of going to my key worker in...

Ugh. This is so me. Without alcohol sexual touch makes me feel literally that I want to to shed my skin. I am an attractive girl and when people respond to that part of me I feel like six years old and it creeps me out. It creeps me out that underneath all that they don't realise that they are...

Just relised through doing 'inner child' work with my therapist that a good chunk of my trauma was through receiving blood tranfusions when as a premature baby and the blood was poisoned and I almost died. I keep feeling that I have too much blood and I need to get it out of my body.

I don't know how to write this post...I think I have alters and I feel so alone. I tried to explain it to someone who said that she believed me and I just shut down and couldn't get the words out. How am I to explain this to people who don't understand? I feel embarrassed and ashamed and...

I have to do this too! Lots of red and I want it all thick when it comes out of the tube. Sometimes even that is hard and there is a block too.

I dont know how to break down the final wall, I keep on butting against it myself....its taken me about three years of therapy before I'm getting to the real emotions of crying and grief and heartbreak and anger and suffering.

Feeling that I don't exist inside my body. Sometimes being surprised by my name of reflection Feeling that my left breast/upper arm is separate from the rest of my body Gagging/spitting Sensitivity to light and sound Exhaustion, but difficulty to relax enough to sleep Feeling that I am flotsam...

Thanks so much with the replies to this thread! I thought I was alone with the vagus nerve/breastbone pain. I have a stuffed animal that I hold tight and the pressure helps.

Yes. I am currently have alot of freezing episodes with the left side of my chest/upper arm which is emotional

This upsets and overwhelms me daily. I'm so glad that someone put into words how I feel, because its not a sensation that I find easy to describe. It upsets me, especially in the area of finding a life partner because I am 28 now and have the pressures of a 28 year old from society. When I had a...

I've had problems with this...its rare that my internal map reaches beyond my head. Sometimes when triggered I have had the sense of losing everything from my hips downward. I also have an issue with my left breast/heart area. I feel like trapped pain, but its not mine, but I wish I could make...

Yeah I get this. Sometimes I look down over my body and its like I'm wondering why it's there? Or I get the sensation that some people describe as 'what happens when you break your arm and it's off at the wrong angle'. It's difficult for me to feel my feet on the ground or the sensation of my...

Firstborn by two and a half years. I have a weird mix of being the one who my parents had the most hope for and now have the most drama about. My younger sister I think had to grow up in my spotlight as a kid but as a older teen/adult she was definitely 'the oldest' in dynamic.

I have clumps of a couple of days where I basically only wake for meals, most of the time I can get up but feel like i could just go back to sleep. Only a few days were I feel normal. Last week has been particularly low on energy. Thank God I don't have the whole nightmares thing.

Tons of denial here very confused and wondering if its worth it. Its very hard for me to start to let in that this might be part of my life for the whole of my life in one way shape or form. There seems to be a physical denial too as though there are two parts that reside in my body and they...

I've had images of animals ripping each other apart

I can only say what worked for me, my therapist was/is very good....it may sound incredulous (well, not here anyway) but she was probably the first person who was comfortable to hear about how I was feeling, until then I had only been around people who tried in some way to shut it down or tell...

I also had very early trauma due to prematurity. I was in an incubator for a long while and I think it really affected my relationship with my mum...emotionally I don't have that mother/daughter connection to her, she might have well as adopted a random baby from the street. Up until about two...

My little is very naughty in a very cute way. She loves to make fun of everyone and have fun. She likes dogs and cats and people. Lots of energy.