Search results

I am so f*cking proud! :joyful: One year no smoking. :woot: Not one cigarette. Not half a cigarette. Not a single goddamn PUFF for exactly 365 days. I cannot believe this. Had been a very, very heavy smoker for over 10 years. :laugh: I am gonna treat myself to a pizza for that. :sneaky: Which...

My panicky and foggy mind refuses to comprehend this. :dead: Can you translate it into stupid? Would be great. :hug:

This is normal. I have learned this is called " A sense of foreshortened future." Learning about it, learning to talk about it, helped me greatly. Its a very common symptom.

Thank you SO SO much! You described it perfectly. I always found that the confusion about why I feel bad can make it 10 times worse. I am pretty much the oposite. Its hard/impossible for me to stop catastrophizing. I know its not fine. Its never gonna be fine. Nothing will ever be fine again...

So, I am not doing so great. I am terrified of next thursday, because it is gonna a be a very difficult day for me, connected to trauma and shit. I will have to talk about it, which I never do, and do stuff I would rather not do, and well, you get the picture. The real problem is all my...

I try to ignore the festivities, pretty much. I am not looking forward to the end of the month, not at all. Gonna be a good test for my sobriety. :wtf: I plan to just continue pretty normally, and try to not care. Everything about christmas and sylvester is trigger territory. I am gonna treat...

Gay dude here. :) I like to consider my partner and myself bears. Woof

I absolutely agree. One of the awsome things about talking about my issue in a learned language is that it frees me of a lot of baggage. There is stuff that I cannot talk or think about in german, but discuss freely in english. I say this, because you made me think about the german word for...

@DogwoodTree Yes I misread you! Sorry. Can you see how I have read it? :hug: Also, pride has nothing to do with feeling superior. Its feeling proud and satisfied with one's work. Its necessary. One can be proud of oneself and loved ones. Its abusers who feel the need to take that feeling away...

Excercise became my most important tool in dealing with PTSD and symptoms. To me its one of the three things that truly help, and the most important one. I still cannot believe that I am doing so much of it. There were months in my life in which I moved less then now in a normal week. It just...

The inability to focus or concentrate. It just f*cks with everything and its the one thing I truly hope will get better over time. There is not a part of my life that doesnt get severly damaged by that.

Forcing oneself to start and play and engage in a videogame. Instead of staring blankly into space and doing nothing, thinking nothing.

Woah, lots of responses. Awsome. @barefoot Yeah, I hear you. I don't believe self-compassion is my issue here. I have learned to be very compassionate with myself concerning my flaws and issues, but this is another matter, no? I feel being overly harsh to oneself and not being able to feel...

Lately I have felt down about myself. The tedium of it all gets to me, and I feel suffocating under my newfound responsiblity for myself. It felt like a very egoistic issue to have, so I have tried to just ignore it. Didn't work. Wrote a letter to a friend today, and the issue became clear to...

Hey :) Your girlfriend reminds me very, very and unpleasently much how I have behaved toward my husbear when I was at my worst. It is approaching "long ago" now, but reading your post brought back a lot of memories. The only difference is that I was never suicidal, as my brothers suicide cured...

@SheilaKathy No, no pets. I cannot afford them at the moment. It is a lifelong dream to have a dog though. :) A year ago I had a wonderfull dream in which I had a puppy. One of those lively dreams one can remember forever. When I woke up and it turned out I had no dog I cried the rest of the...

Today I felt crushing, painfull loneliness. I have not felt that way for ten years, when it was the worst of times. I am as isolated today as I have been for years. I did not mind at all. I liked it. I don't like it anymore. It feels like basic human needs that I have ignored for too long have...

The feeling of getting worse is normal. This journey is not straight foward. Up and down, and forwards and backwards it is. The most important thing for me was to learn patience. Unfortunately dealing with ptsd is a very long term thing. Once I was through it a few times that ugly feeling of...

5 years ago I got diagnosed with mild AD(H)D and having a bit Sadness. I laughed my ass off and cried hopelessly at the same time. Made the vow to only return to mental healh care when I know what was going on. Took years. Am back in the system and going good so far.

I have made appointments with over two dozen doctors and therapists. Its important to maximize your chances. In germany that is how its done, maybe situation in UK is different, but I am pretty sure one doctor is not enough. Sorry if not applicable.

No. They all thought I was so, so lucky I had that sweet old lady taking care of me. When I started talking after she died, those who knew did not believe me. Me talking about my family was the last conversation I have had with two people I considered my best friends. God, I am so happy all this...

Yes they all knew. The younger made fun about it and used it as a weapon. The older ignored it completely. That my mother abandoned me was used as a funny insult and to end discussion or any sign of opposition. That my next caretaker was insane and cruel was known, and even those she destroyed...

Three Steps Forward, Two Steps Back. @sun seeker Six weeks ago you asked me how I was doing. Thank you and sorry for not replying. @VioletButterfly Thank you so much for your words. They mean a lot to me. @AnnaC hope to hear from you so soon. My thoughts are with you, always. @Whispering_Truth...

Its a long time ago that I started this thread, and I am so happy I did. Besides the amazing stuff that happened in here I also went on to figure out what prompted this in the first place. Why the hell I feel so trapped in a world of shoulds and shouldnts. Found answers. Its apparently a...

“Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?” ― Albus Dumbledore