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For the longest time I could only remember the nightmare. It started when I was fifteen. I felt his hands on my head and I was choking and gagging. I was pretty sure it happened when I was three or four. I thought it happened in a bathroom. I remembered the curve of white like a toilet or a...

I guess I always knew I was different. I cried about everything and became very angry about nothing. That got me into a lot of trouble at school and at home. I internalized most of the anger and took it out on myself. My mother always talked about how she was going to kill herself. When I...

Thank you bluedream. I'm in therapy. We did EMDR and I did remember more. I just don't trust my new memories. Sometimes they come back in pieces and sometimes they flood back. I keep hearing that recovered memories are highly inaccurate. I'm not sure if what I remember now is true or not. It's...

The numbness gets to me sometimes. I feel like I'm not feeling anything. Everything seems like it's happening to someone else. I want to cry but I don't know why. I went to lunch today and saw someone who went to my church when I was a kid. Every time I see a guy between 60 & 70 who went there...

Mine is a zombietar my daughter made. I play Plants vs Zombies almost daily. Sometimes I feel like I'm stumbling through life like a zombie. I wonder what it would be like to actually feel emotions when things happen instead of hours later.

1. Borderline personality disorder 2. Major depression. 3. Anxiety disorder. 4. PTSD I'm not sure if insomnia and an emotional handicap count.

I guess I'm just really confused. I remembered almost nothing. My therapist told me I should turn on the light. We did the emdr and now I remember more. Then he tells me that these memories are highly inaccurate. I'm not really sure what happened to me. I think I bit him and then he raped me...

I was three when it happened. I was at preschool at my church. I'm not sure how I got separated from the group. He found me and took me to the office. I can't remember who he is. He put himself in my mouth and I was choking and gagging and really scared. I think I bit him. After that it...

I've feltthat way before. What I do is count to five. I've made it five seconds without trying to kill myself. I count to five again. I've made it ten seconds without trying to kill myself. I keep doing that until I feel a little more relaxed. After that I call someone to help me. It sounds...

I've been on here for a few months just reading what other people have written. I guess it's time to introduce myself. I've had a rough childhood. I was sexually abused when I was three at the church I was raised in. I didn't remember anything until I was fifteen. My mother was emotionally...

I created a weird comic book of my abuse. It helped me figure out what I remember and where the blank spots were. I'm not sure if it helped or hurt laying it out in picture form trying to figure out where the pieces fit together. It helped me remember more. Some of the memories I wish I could...

My nightmare started when I was 15. I could feel his grip on my head. I wake up choking and gagging and covered in sweat. I've had the same nightmare for 20 years. Sometimes it's so often I'm afraid to sleep.