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I hope this is not goodbye. Did you call them and ask? I'm glad your wife found a job. How exciting to experience the whole life cycle of the horse as you learn about them. I expect that would prove very valuable to you in your ability to reflect on what you're learning in other aspects of...

Sunshine, I hope you value yourself and take this real important issue into counseling to figure out what is best for you. It's not about if he's mad, it's about what your life is about and is fear in the way of taking any steps to making life more than just survival.

Is this just how it feels being PTSD? Am I way off? I pushed myself to go outside my comfort zone with my spouse in loving ways. He never said anything positive until after he blew up at me while I was waiting on him hand and foot by way of acknowledging the bad timing. It's like "I scratch...

When people want you to make a public statement, I question their motives. In fact, I ask how this benefits them personally, and in a way, it sounds like they want you to say they are helping you, aka, your life is free-warm-market advertising for their business. If they cared about you, first...

I get that, but, also, trust, love, all these things, they are not identical for everyone, but most of the time, it's not hard to see the signs someone else is experiencing these emotional states. Thing is, I don't know that most set out with a goal of feeling this stuff. It just happens...

Two things, I agree with Friday, avoid him when he's in HALT or pain or getting ready for work, or you can sense the bad mood. But, if you can't tell, and you still get this treatment, whatever boundary you set, he's gonna cross it. It's not personal to you, but rather who he is as a person...

This makes me not want to trust medical procedures. There are risks involved, and then there's the pain risk, too.

Are you in counseling or therapy, or have you been? That could be from different things, so not sure what to respond yet. It can be attachment style and/or based on learned response to early environment. It can be plain old adult onset PTSD avoidance, that you're explaining this way, feeling...

Thank you @J'qel He's not threatening or violent, but I felt for a split second afraid when he charged into the kitchen towards me. It turned out he was getting his pill. And that was located directly behind where I was standing. He didn't tell me why he was moving so fast and loud toward...

I hear you. It's one of those things, I suppose that we want other to own how their actions make us feel, but when it comes to our own actions, we want others to see our intentions were not bad, rather than how it made them feel. That goes both ways. So, it's not about my needs or intentions...

typical of gaslighting, as a way to redirect silence a partner’s attempts to bring up an issue, and redirect the focus to what’s “wrong” with her instead:

Has anyone shown you unconditional or unabusive love before?

I had to run for the door. I'd like to complete my thought. It was a gaslighting attack plain and simple. We're in a financial situation that we're trying to recover from, and instead of open communication, he wants to fix it himself or says "Yeah, great," to my ideas as he walks away with...

Thank you all. It means so much to log in here and see someone else can reach out while I'm still in a lot of pain and anger over this. Thank you for this, no, he's not. This whole negative interaction has been building. I've mentioned therapy, in terms of finding out what's fueling his rage...

Great post Friday about trust not being all or nothing or automatically given, has to be earned. I think though in some people's case, there is seemingly no way to earn or experience it that is known yet. So, it's that much more scary to try again. But if you don't ever try, you won't be...

What happens when your spouse's occasional darkness starts to be their main gig and you hardly recognize them as someone who loves you and helped you through your darkest hour? When life has been unfair or they haven't had any luck, and they seem to have nothing ahead of them or behind them...

Exactly, and normal for what you'be been through. There is no shame in feeling as you do. You have good reasons to have trust issue with men. I do, too. I work very hard on it, and after being in a safe zone in a relationship with a man, I start to think maybe all men are not that bad and I've...

You're so welcome if my post was any help at all. I get that things can be relatively happy and positive and then take a turn for the worse when there is change. My wonderful husband has always had a passive aggressive, defensive side that rears its head when he's insecure to an unmanageable...

I had no choice to get off of all wheat and gluten. It is an allergy. The symptoms were heart racing, GI upset that felt like a heart attack, and anxiety with difficulty thinking or breathing. I had thought all of that was PTSD, since it takes about 20 minutes after eating wheat and I ate...

Please join me in thanking the moderators, Anthony and Nicolette for all they do to make this forum the wonderful site that it is. Happy Valentine's Day :singing::joyful::inlove:

I'm sorry to hear that others have dealt with this trauma.

In reading your post and story, I felt while reading that you glossed over the fact that (at age 10?) you obeyed your mom and lied to the authorities, to get him out of jail. In my opinion, you are not angry at her, but rather at yourself for listening to her, for putting his freedom over...

I had a dream that I met and worked with a real early child trauma world-class therapy expert. In the dream, he asked me to buy a doll and a rocking doll cradle, just like I had as a child. I dreamed that my husband and I put it into the trunk of my car. Like an idea that might come up in...

I can see how this might work. On the other hand, it reminds me of the way props get bashed and joked about, like ink blots and puppets. I can't help but envision the puppets in What About Bob? Those were for the person to use the puppet as a filter (way of distancing oneself from the...

Since it takes a year for this free service dog to happen, I suggest just applying if you think you'll be ready by then. It could take 2 years. Who knows. With PTSD, there is a symptom of a foreshortened sense of the future. I know I have that problem, and it affects my ability to long-term...