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I have an issue with people saying one thing and meaning another. Being the scapegoat. Being set-up to be in trouble for no reason. Always in trouble and never out of it. Being told "You stupid child, you will die! You can live for three weeks without food, three days with out water but only...

I'm presuming there was more to this post that's been edited out? I'm confused :S

Glad you found your way to the forum, welcome and thanks for sharing. :)

Yes, particularly if someone is upset around me but I don't know why, I blame myself and feel awful, even if it's not at all my fault. Also I get that if I can't handle what I'm experiencing at that moment.

Welcome :)

A trigger could be anything that reminds you of the trauma, you said in your other post that you were at a party, so the red could come from clothing, decorations, beer cups (like the one attached). Anything that reminds you of the person or the time/place you were assaulted. It could also have...

Another night to be taken along with me. I'll message back to say how it went.

The app is called Sleepbot, it uses your phones accelerometer to detect movement and records the sounds, you can tap on a peak to listen to 10-15 seconds which is pretty useful although I would have liked it if you could hear the whole night because I suspect I grind my teeth, though I don't...

Yes the books are always better, but I love that they're made into films - even if they're a let down, I like seeing how they are interpreted and portrayed by the directors/actors plus it turns more people to read the books I think and that's good too. :)

My mother feels much the same, I tell her she was not to blame - never to blame. The only people who are to blame are the ones who committed the abuse. She didn't know, couldn't have known, it's not her fault. I wish I could make her believe that. It's difficult. We cycle off of each other - If...

Last month I was accused over the phone by a (not my normal) social worker of messing my sleep up by sleeping in in the mornings and insomnia directly caused by my meds were not their fault but mine - that I must be doing something wrong because they simply don't do that (read the fine print -...

I need to have my gallbladder removed due to gallstones - in most cases gallstones come from eating too many fatty foods and these trigger gallbladder attacks which get more and more excruciatingly painful (started out like a migraine in my abdomen but now morphine doesn't touch it). Except mine...

It's actually the other way round but once you've been exposed to one you seem to attract more of that sort, plus because you're scared of it, you see in more in more people. Our brains are very good at seeing patterns in just about anything. Just challenging your thinking. :)

Whilst I am capable of reading a lot more complicated/sophisticated writing, I find I enjoy reading fantasy stories written for the teen audience as it caters to my current attention span much more, plus I find the characters much more relatable. Thanks for sharing :)

Yes, not all the details but a broad outline and that I have PTSD because of it. The way I am likely to build a relationship would be to start with friendship and let it move forward slowly, this way a lot can be taken into account and that person will know everything before romantic/sexual ties...

I can't imagine what you're going through, in so many ways I'm glad I was so dissociated during the time of my abuse and after, I also had a miscarriage but I have no recollection to dates except it might have been spring/summer. I see so many of us here haunted by dates and I'm so relieved not...

I want your therapist ;) It's taken over a year of me telling the local Mental Health Unit 1 and 2 of your therapist's assessment and them ignoring it every time and me ending up in the hospital. This last time my social worker said "I've learned a lot about you with ths (last) hospitalisation...

@Solara I gave up worry for lent, I'll let you know how that one turns out! Chocolate on the other hand - well when I go to see the pysch in a week or so, I'm going to tell him that chocolate is the only thing keeping me even remotely sane at the moment. Another fun chocolate-brain chemical...

Oh definitely Grey's! I don't really know if Meredith falls under the PTSD category from her mother as there's no Criterion A marker (though on second thoughts maybe her mothers self-harm), but she's definitely deeply affected by a broken childhood (attachment issues much?) and I would say a...

This is good in every way, except that sometimes when we're doing everything right our brain unloads on us and makes everything more difficult and can make things seem futile. It is however the key to healing I think and it's great that you see it in the positive way it really is.

I'd like to agree with the alter thing - fully fledged alters usually happen before the age of 7-10 before the foundations of the personality are set. Though maybe partial personalities and/or ego states may form after that as a coping mechanism. But it sounds like your jumping the gun a little...

Cannabis is categorised under being a dissociative drug. It can also cause long-term dissociative disorders as a side-effect, in fact almost every case of depersonalisation and derealisation disorder I've read about that hasn't been related to trauma (and usually child-trauma) have been related...

Did you have these symptoms before the meds? It's just that quite a few anxiety meds slow everything down and make it hard to form thoughts both internally and words externally - including forgetting what you're saying or the word you're looking for. Though I do this without meds which is why...

It depends I get three main types of flashbacks and I think I freeze during two of them. During one I get mind splitting migraines before so I'm usually alone my room curled up where I sleep (on the floor), these flashbacks are full body and every sense, I'm entirely back then and not "here" at...

Hamitch and Katniss (and several others) in the Hunger Games are haunted by their experiences. Criminal Minds - Season 2, Episode 17 is all about a severely triggered and dissociated veteran, through out the seasons' many of the main characters show some signs of Acute Stress Disorder - however...