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I hate to keep bothering you, but I have so many questions, and I know he's just not going to be ready for them anytime soon. I know you say you tell your husband periodically that you want a divorce, then you have to have a cooling off period. Before you were married, did you ever break up with...

I honestly love everything you just said! My mind is kind of jelly right now, so I don't have a whole lot to offer in return. However, I do see your point of view clearly, and it helped to sooth my heart a bit. I think I'm maybe a bit too raw because of the personal aspects of it (knowing the...

Does anyone else here feel like the posts and memes about cutting the stigma of mental illness, or PTSD post about 22 days, or other ones regarding the face of Depression just feel like lip service? It's really getting under my skin the last few weeks as I've tried to reach out to some friends...

What makes you were wrong? Are you saying it wasn't love because you were hurt? I agree with this completely. It's a beautiful statement! Again, I couldn't agree more. I think too many people get caught up with the pie in the sky feelings being there or not there. I think this does love a...

Good for you! You're such an intelligent person, that I'm sure you can find something that can work for you. When I started with my current T, I had more success than with the rest combined. I've been with her for about a year. I started EMDR with her as well. I'm not finished, but I can...

It was, @EveHarrington ! Im sorry if that got lost in the way I spoke. I think, honestly I understand what you're saying and agree. I think he's been numb for awhile, but every so often he feels guilty. I also think it got way more in his face with therapy starting, his friend moving in, and...

Thank you! I'm less confident today, but I'll get back there. He's pretty numb right now, and there's not a dang thing I can do about that but hope he works through it in therapy and EMDR. I'm not planning on going anywhere in the meantime, though.

I didn't detect an ounce of snark. He's gone this weekend, he texted he made it safely - thankfully because his son is with him. So, this means since I know he's safe at his parents, I should be able to focus back to getting my crap together. I have so much stuff that got out of hand to get...

So, he just sent me a message that it went good and he's doing "okay". I can't help but wonder if he was even invested in it or not based on him having so much stuff planned. Maybe he's trying to make me not worry, who knows. Oh boy, that scares the living crap out of me, lol! It would be...

I think for most things in life, there are way to express just about anything with tact. I think if you give someone the benefit of the doubt and tell them gently, you can preserve a relationship. Of course, this is vague, because your question elicits that sort of response.

I very genuinely feel that I experience that when dissociated... like a humming to help block stuff out.

That's a very interesting reply. We've been together a long time now, and he definitely uses numbing as a self preservation technique. I don't know why he hasn't learned now, that's it's an ebb and flow. Honestly lack of "romantic feelings " even happens to the "normies". It's just part of...

Oh yeah, and it hurts like hell that he's not experiencing the pain of it. He's made damn sure he's numb, and won't admit that's what he is doing. I wonder if he's bothered to realize that is that it's going on. I hate that I have zero control over this. I don't know what to do at this...

@Freida, have you ever told your husband that you're not capable of being in a relationship? How did he react? How long did it take you to "come around"? What was he doing in the interim? He told me he had nothing but warm loving feelings about me, but he isn't capable of being involved with...

So, we are going to finally catch up tiday and have brunch. I'm so excited and terrified. On one hand, I just want to enjoy each other's company, but I also want to see what's all going on and figure out what to expect. Even just sitting this out right now it's helping me calm down. The...

We've tried to set ground rules, but he moves the football line Lucy with Charlie Brown. It's hard for me ti answer, since they haven't been adhered to. Sorry...

I will gladly accept the hugs! I'm sorry to hear this, because I'm sure it's very difficult for you right now. It can be quite painful. But we understand where you are coming from, and know that the end of your relationship doesn't invalidate your struggle in any way. You were in completely, and...

I wanted to check in and see how you're doing. You're in my thoughts this morning.

I need a bit of time to process before I post more, but damn , do I love you guys and your insight!

I'm glad you follow your "rules". ...he isn't always capable. So if/ when this is over, we will really need to reevaluate them. It really seems like he's really run down this time. He's been very sweet in his communication, but it's littered with notions that he's exhausted. So I'm trying to be...

Oh if there were only a love button instead of like! We are anything but conventional! I don't think conventional works for either of us. I'm always working towards getting everyone else to pound salt! You have no idea how much you mean to me for just being you! Even if stuff goes south for...

Let me know when you figure it out! We can co-author a book! (Freida-Nae, instead of Frito Lay! Oh boy I'm a spaz for thinking that! ) When you used to try to leave your husband and he wouldn't leave, did that make you mad? Or did you appreciate it later? Would you have been hurt if he...

If you want you can ask me in my diary or somewhere else. I'm a fairly open book on here. This is my "safe space" so to speak. Otherwise I'm not sure where you would feel safer.

Everything you're saying here makes perfect sense to me. I understand fairly well how you're trying to explain it all. Having the conversation helps so much. I just wonder sometimes what he'd do if I ever actually left. Sometimes I think he realizes he's safe to do this because I don't go...

I think there used to be, .....but it's gone now.