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I am very new to this site as I only found it a few months ago. My experiences are somewhat limited with my Vet since we only see each other 2-3 times a week because he tends to want to isolate himself and have been together 1 1/2 yrs. I can tell you this. Don't beat yourself up!! It is never...

My Vet is older so he has many issues besides ptsd including a lot of depression now. He says not to take it personally when he doesn't feel like any affection. I try not too but it is so hard. Am I doing the wrong thing by going up and hugging him anyway or kissing him Hello? He is too nice a...

I have started going to Al-Anon to find peace within myself because my ex husband was a workaholic. I believe he was an Alcoholic that just didn't drink. And now I also am dealing with my Vet that has been through AA himself but is not always practicing what it taught him. Maybe when I tell him...

See that is his biggest problem. He thinks America is doomed. No really he will tell me he KNOWS we are. And it is so personal for him because he is so patriotic, fought in Vietnam and loves this country. So I think that fuels all of his frustration and anger towards others because he says no...

I know I am going to have to mention again about using the N word around me. All of this started stirring up because of the recent police shootings of the blacks and the aftermath of it all. He was mad at the blacks involved in the rioting but really mad at Obama for getting involved and feels...

My Vet was in Vietnam and although not in combat he saw enough of the horrors and was exposed to Agent Orange. He is also a recovering Alcoholic so he has had many issues that he has and is still dealing with. I really don't want to think he is a racist but the things he will say can sound...

I found an online forum for Al-Anon and got on the chat room tonight to talk to a few people.

"I knew I should wait until he was ready to talk".... Wow is that ever me. I know I am so much older than you but stories on here can be so similar. Over time I have gotten better. One night last year my Vet hung up on me. He is much older than me and retired but I have to get myself together to...

Thanks!! So glad to be here!!

I also decided to start going to Al-Anon to start focusing on my inner strength and issues. I have many problems also from my divorce that I need to work on finding peace and being able to move on. One more thing I wanted to add. The way I met my Vet was so unusual I believe God had a hand in...

I have realized that the way our relationship started off was probably not the 'real' him. Hard to say. Some things have happened in his family and health over the past 6 months or more that have made him more depressed. I have over the last several months worked on accepting that he will not...

Hi!! I have posted several times but have not officially introduced myself. After my divorce 1 1/2 yrs ago I met my Vet by accident as I wasn't looking to date anyone. He was always upfront and honest with me about his past marriages, ptsd and Alcoholism. He was in Vietnam so is 16 yrs older...

Thank you Lilmssunshine!! You just don't know how much I needed that!!! Since my divorce I have written things and quotes down and put them on my bathroom mirror. I am going to add this one to my collection.

I don't think there is really anything you can do to convince them they need help. Although my vet is so much older than most of your's it all sounds the same. He has been through AA and can usually 'talk a good talk' and give me great advice on living one day at a time for my problems yet he is...

Thanks! Someone on another post mentioned Al-Anon meetings so I am going to start going. I need some other people to talk to about all of this for some support. He has been sober 19 years but his mood swings, yes could be ptsd but I think his Alcoholism plays an effect in all of it. That is...

Thanks! I should have looked into Al-Anon meetings a long time ago. I'm sure it would have helped me to better understand him and have someone to talk to. Yes, he has been sober for 19 years but his depression and frequent moody behavior makes me worry. I think he would be better if he still...

Thanks! I am trying. It is hard. The bad thing is partly because of my depression and divorce 1 1/2 yrs ago I do not have any friends because I moved to a new city. So no one else to talk to. I am going to my counselor today. It has taken so much of my energy just to keep myself working part...

Since we had a disagreement tonight and will not talk for several days what do you do to pass the time? I think because we had a few discussions that were too emotional for him we stopped talking at all on the phone a few months ago. He worries too much it will happen again. He hates any kind...

All of this sounds familiar no matter what the age of the vet with ptsd. My guy was in Vietnam. Our relationship started out great. Lots and lots of affection. Communication was really good. We were talking on the phone for a long time everyday. Then we would have some slight conflicting views...

Ok. So I don't know this woman he talks to at the nursing home. I do believe him when he says she is elderly with some dementia because she may call several times a night when I am there. Not to be too graphic but what 'weirded' me out was I heard him say something like 'He's just been jacking...

Yeah, we had about 3 at least of these last year. Then I would go back after 3 days or so and he would be better. One time I mentioned about we had broke up and he was saying like he didn't consider us breaking up during that time. It confused the hell out of me. His Alcoholism plays a big...

I made such a mistake. I know I did. My Vet I am dating is 16 yrs older than me. I am 55. So that with the ptsd has it's own challenges. But I knew after I got to know him that the relationship would be worth it. There has been several time that my emotions have gotten carried away and he can't...

I have learned a lot from this forum. So glad I found it. I wasn't really getting upset at him but asking him 'Why couldn't we do this... " or he might get on the phone while I was there and that became annoying. But after he explained it I understood. That is the reason I wrote the note...

Well most the times it is not really repeating myself. It is asking him if he heard what I said. He does have some dementia problems either because of his age, family history, exposure to agent orange or ptsd. I think now I am just going to have to pick better times to talk. I need to be more in...

I am dating my guy who is a Vietnam vet. I think because of his age and the time that has gone by he doesn't physically disappear but mentally when I am over there I can tell his mind is elsewhere. I can talk to him and I have to repeat things because he is not comprehending what I am saying. A...