Search results

I think it is hard to know what love is if you have never really been part of it. As with me the people I should have learnt what love meant never showed any. So it is hard to understand what it is. I guess this was much the same for you. Love was disguised as manipulation and egotistical...

I think that is a good thing too. Doing something for yourself for once is good therapy. A bit of self indulgence is good for the soul. :) I think for me it is more about wanting to do something for someone else for a change. I have been on my own for a long time bringing up kids ect...

That is sad to hear. It was only through someone elses' lack of care and handling that you got damaged. But I would like to think that you are not broken and that someone else will treat you with care, including yourself. :) I would assume that your thoughts were insecure in this area. I...

I have been thinking about this a lot lately. About the meaning of attachment. I suppose when we are very young we attach to those we feel closest too or are in part nearest too or who we spend the most time with. When very young we have no choice in who we attach to and it can be a...

repeated last post? for some reason posted twice. Sorry

Hi Jimni I think I also make mistakes I regret afterwards and loose something good without realising it at the time. Do you want to talk about how you 'screwed' up? I know I have done some really irrational things that have lost me a lot. I try not to let what I did worry me now...

HI Whitelady I have never studied Erikson but by what you said his theory makes perfect sense. I think from a young age you learn how to adapt and develop socially and this can be encouraged in a positive or negative way by parents and carers. For me I learnt at a young age that I should...

I have gone back to watching 'Carry on' films at the moment they are always light and entertaining:) Having to spend time at home at the moment I have tried to find other movies that will inspire and have just ordered peaceful warrior and wondered if anyone had any comments on it. :) best...

HI Jimni I understand that. I do not challenge men and allow them to think they are walking all over me. It was not to do with being a doormat but did make it easy for them. I am just easy going and did not feel the need to make it hard work all the time. Relationships are supposed to...

Hi Invisible Guy I am sorry you have been pushed into socializing when you do not feel like it. It doesn't encourage a good time but just makes it worse in ways. Are you feeling that you want to be left alone but ask why doesn't anyone respect that? It sounds like they think they have...

No, it is a good reminder for me. Sometimes I get caught up in the moment and write how I speak or can rush things. It does make it so much easier to read if it is set out correctly. I see it as a kick up the bum rather than an attack. I do get worried that I might get band for it...

identity

I can understand that Mindiface85. I realised that I had no idea of who I am. What I liked, what I felt about things, what I enjoyed and would wander around looking for something. But never sure of what. I am still trying to find myself and why. I can sit there and think I really...

Yes I have a great wall around me that is very hard to penetrate. I fear showing emotions, it makes me feel vulnerable. I fear getting close it makes me feel paranoid about their motives. I distrust what people say about me if it is positive. I fear abandonment and rejection so do not...

Hi Kent Rico I am not surprised by that at all. The trauma you have suffered through seeing what you did and in the circumstances it happened will cause you great fear and anxiety for those you are close to and might get close to in the future. It might be that your parents just do...

HI Jimni I can fully understand that. For me it was looking to be needed and wanted, I realise that this was the wrong type of attention now. But now I feel like you that it is pointless without the other connections needed in a relationship. I Feel stupid now for not knowing what...

HI Jenmi So you felt guilty? Society conditions us to. Sex is natural and should be fulfilling. Liking sex is good but if doing it with lots of people makes you feel guilty it is a social acceptance thing. Finding one person to have sex with then can fullfull a need without having the...

Hi Cat herder I think it will help if you can learn the skills needed to be able to cope with guys like this so that you can do what you want in life. You symptoms are your reaction to your anxiety caused by the lack of confidence needed to be able to deal with what this guy is doing to...

I still like to watch old Disney movies like the aristocats and bambi. Watching tom and jerry and top cat reminds me of when I was young and would often loose myself in cartoons. So it was a happy time. I get really emotional if I watch films where love and protection for a child in them...

Hi Jimni I think is certain cases promiscuity can be a form of self destruction. A lot of abused people fall into a self destruct mode either with sex, drugs, alcohol, self harm and/or dissociation. Amongst many other things. A lot of people like having sex with a lot of people but their...

Hi Jules I think your husband is selfish and self absorbed. How dare he spill crap like this to justify his sexual needs. You are worth so much more than this. IF he is not satisfied sexually at home that is his fault not yours. It takes two to tango. If he wants to go off and have...

Hi Kent Rico That was a horrific trauma. PTSD does not need to be a military trauma. Any trauma can cause it and it is personal and individual to the sufferer. Were you close to your family before? Your own fear of loss and the trauma might make you want to keep in control. Taking...

Hi xena21 I have never had a meaningful relationship, even with my parents. For me any relationship was better than none, even if it was abusive. I realise now that I was looking for someone to fill a void so anyone would do. I did not connect with them in the proper ways because I was...

Hi Orglethorp It sounds like she has major issues with her confidence anxiety and self esteem herself. She is trying too hard to fit in. Getting over excited and anxious about things. Showing her immaturity and lack of awareness towards others. You are not there as her babysitter or as a...

Going back to school will help you develop new skills for a new job. What would you like to retrain in? To be honest though I would go back and demand for the help to develop the skills needed to be able to deal with bullies too. Cyber bullies are cowards who hide behind their screens...