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Absolutely, anytime you'd like to chat. :)

I just wanted to let you know that I can relate. ((((gentle hugs)))) if that's ok...

You're not alone in this. My ptsd is made worse this time of year. A touch of SAD... maybe. But I know it can get pretty awful. What to do to make it better... Good question. Sometimes if I catch the mood early I can get outside and enjoy nature and some fresh air unless it's too cold. Other...

It could be injured frighted and or hiding. Maybe put kitty in a safe place for a few and look around?

As far as finding something from childhood that I enjoyed doing most, that may be one of the issues... While reading about this topic (researching) over the last week, I came across this theory that resonates deeply with me. I can't quote it directly or give the source because I just jotted it...

I think it's a very common PTSD misdiagnosis, especially if the doctor does not take a thorough history and doesn't ask probing questions. I think delayed PTSD is probably misdiagnosed even more often since the traumatic events happened years previously so the doctors may not even make the...

My house didn't burn down but the basement wall collapsed last year leaving it immediately condemned. It's not a covered loss (repair was $20,000 and not affordable for us) so we lost our home. We now live 3 blocks from it and it sits there with all our belongings covered in mold. We foreclosed...

Do you have a link to the article?

I know sometimes it can be comforting and comfortable. Sometimes though, I think we can miss a lot of good feeling when we're like that.

I agree, even though I have all those symptoms they are very well explained by my trauma and therefore probably wouldn't qualify for a personality disorder.

Link The Connection Between PTSD and Avoidant Personality Disorder

I am often in a state of numb/ emotionless but not necessarily in a bad way. It's not the kind of numbness that feels completely empty which is rather distressing in the sense that it feels like something is wrong or missing. It's more like I am just not emotionally present. I'm not happy when...

I don't believe that you're beyond any further help. Especially if you're so scared of continuing without therapeutic support. I've been in therapy for over 20 years, though most of it has been supportive therapy since ptsd can amplify daily stressors. If you can't get what you need from this...

Thank you. :)

Yeah, sounds likely. None of my Ts have ever seen those cracks though because I present myself as put together with the exception of talking about trauma stuff. I tell them about this kind of thing but they never have actually seen it 1st hand. So I guess this is a good thing then right?

Today T time started out good. I was in a good place mentally I think (not sure though since I didn't feel like going and that usually means a person needs to go). I posted last week I think about how I am tired of talking about friendships in T time and felt encouraged to let my T know that...

I agree but the 2 "budding" friendships are very new. One is about a year old and the other less than 6 months. For me this is a big accomplishment. I haven't even tried to make friends in a good 7 years or so. I don't know what I can do except for let them slowly become what ever they become...

Grrrrr. My T keeps pushing me on the subject of making friends and building on the possible friendships I have. I'm trying, I am. But I know that even with "normal" people building friendships, especially when we're older, takes time. It's going to take me MORE time. I have big trust issues...

This is an accomplishment for me right now. :)

I decided not to do this.

What is MDD? I think I know but can't remember now.

I take it for PTSD but I have bi polar type symptoms when I'm not on my meds. Right now I'm having them anyway.... time for a med check. I also take wellbutrin for depression and in the past I took risperdal. Risperdal and lamictal was my wonder drug combo. Changed my life.

PS... You are Not Alone. <3

Welcome Chelsea. I want to reassure you that most early childhood memories are not verbal. I think it is perfectly normal for them to be remembered as feelings, gibberish and incomplete or unclear "images". Even traumatic memories from when we're older often come up only as emotion at first. I...

The unanswerable question... Why? Why... because there were So Many adults along the way who could have helped and could have changed my life and could have prevented so many bad things from happening but they didn't. I just slipped through the cracks like water. And it was dark down there...