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@LokiBell I'm so sorry to hear that. You worked so hard to prepare yourself, only to have him squirm his way out of it at the 11th hour. He won't be able to do that again. You are doing an amazing job, getting things done despite the state you are in. At least you know that the medication...

Hi there, welcome to the forum! This is a really supportive, safe place. Sorry for the reason you are here, but glad you have found us!

I know what you mean about the self image stuff. My parents never gave me any feedback about myself, they kind of didn't notice me much. I've realised that when that doesn't happen, you don't really have that parental reflection of who you are - so it makes it harder to know. There's a book I...

@AB87 I'm sorry, I missed that too. :( I've been a little scattered lately. So, I want to fix it - you're a very caring girlfriend! I'm glad she is getting therapy, and that she has such great support from you.

nightmares

Really rough patch. Trying to do self-care, and struggling with it. Lots of intense emotions and triggering going on right now. Nervous about seeing my T after she's been on holidays for a month, and telling her how much I'm struggling, like I've failed at life again. I know that's stupid...

When you are surprised if someone seems happy to see you, and wonder if their judgement is off.

(((mytai))) What an incredibly brave thing you have done. I am so sorry you are struggling so badly right now. That JP is small-minded, and as Echo said, probably likes to convince themselves they are so very clever. The police are listening to you, and I'm so glad that this part was a...

It being hard to talk about is characteristic of PTSD. You've made a great start here, with that post. Hopefully the psychologist you have been referred to specialises in trauma - if not, maybe try to find one who does? It's worth looking for someone specialising in that area if you can.

Ugghh. Still feeling rotten. Depressed and anxious, same old, same old. Looking forward to passing through this bad patch.

One more! This is a post from Hashi again, that leads on from that last one I posted: Post #25 https://www.myptsd.com/threads/self-doubt-can-you-get-flashbacks-without-ptsd.39564/ If I am way off base, let me know, as I am easily confused lately! Just thought with your comment that you...

I just realised where I read something relevant to this - it was my own thread (LOL), and I was frustrated and upset at not knowing for sure what had happened to me as a young child. I was directed to the following extract from yet another thread, and got some very sage advice from Hashi - look...

@Solara Thanks for that. Same here - diagnosed about 2-3 years after withdrawal, but flashbacks since childhood. I didn't equate the experiences in withdrawal to flashbacks until my diagnosis, when I realised that I'd always had these experiences. They were just intense during withdrawal for...

@Hope4Now I'm right with you on this - having the same problem. I'm having so many dreams lately, and often am waking up very dissociated which lasts for hours. It's frustrating. It's not just nightmares, but I know I'm having dreams that seem significant, I just forget most of them. I've...

Still having nightmares, but can't remember them. Woke up anxious again. Having terrible trouble finding motivation for even the simplest things, like doing a load of washing. Feeling jumpy and apprehensive.

@billie I'm in therapy, but haven't seen my T in nearly a month, as she's been overseas on holidays. I did an EMDR, my first, earlier this year, and it's been ever since then. So maybe you are on to something. I'd like to think it's a good sign! It's been a rough ride lately, but I'm still...

@mytai It sounds like you've answered your own question regarding whether to allow yourself to dissociate or not. Trust your gut, your intuition. Keep doing whatever it takes, you can do this! You've done it before without support, but this time is so much different to then - your T is going...

I don't know if I'm too late with this comment, but I'm tending towards thinking just let yourself be today, and save your energy for tomorrow. Remember, you won't be alone, your advocate will be with you and all of us here will be with you in spirit. Albatross's suggestion of sour warheads...

Actually, I've been having trouble doing basic things ever since my PTSD hit me full-blown a few months ago, so that's not new.

Does anyone else have this? I've had it before, but never to this extent. I've been dreaming a lot lately, but don't know what I'm dreaming, just that there seems to be a lot going on in the dreams. Several nights ago I had flashbacks and nightmares all night. When that happens, I'm...

When my son was 3, (and I had PTSD, but didn't know it yet): Don't worry Mummy. When I grow up, I'm going to buy you a puppy.

Actually, just found something. Maybe it's part of why I've been absent from this forum lately. I feel undeserving. I feel faulty. As if all the crap that has happened and is happening is because I'm some kind of bad luck charm. And I'm infectious, so I spread it around to those I love...

@franciemarnie That HALT thing sounds really useful. I'm going to remember that one. I'm feeling...it's hard today to describe it. It's a mess in there. One thing is probably hopelessness. Anxiety too.

@Maggiemay You have the right to seek answers about what's happening with your own self! Do you know why your T might not be happy about that? If not, maybe ask her. The information you have gotten back sounds like it could be very useful. Does Pottergate have any suggestions for you?

I've not been around for a while. Haven't been doing so well. Withdrawn, depressed. Anxious. Stress cup overflowing.