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Sorry for posting so much. I’d like to go home now but I’m not sure where he is at during this isolation period. I’ve been staying at a friends house since Tuesday night to give him space (voluntarily). He has not reached out. How can I word a text to let him know I would like to come home now...

I’ve been at my friends house since Tuesday night. I want to go home tomorrow. I want to give him a heads up to let him know I’m coming home. What do I say in the text to not make him overwhelmed bc I have no idea where he’s at during isolation.

I just had a talk with my friend and I told her things he has said to me and her words were “that’s abuse, you don’t deserve it”... I’m contemplating on it I should go there and just pack more of what I need and tell him I can’t do this anymore

That’s very good advice, thank you. “I need” is better than the pressure of “we need”. I sent him a text the other night to let him know I’m here still.. not expecting a response and not asking for answers, just a generic “Hey hope you’re doing alright, I just wanted to say goodnight”. I think...

Yes I’m aware there is no set time as I noted in my post. I’m asking how long everyone else handles isolation typically

I’m aware it’s different for everyone, but what is typical amount of time for isolation? For our relationship- isolation has always lead to breaking up, but we live together now. So I told him to take time for himself while I stay at a friends house, and that we need to skip the breaking up...

I literally don’t have the energy for that, or the want to date during “breaks” but as long as it’s known and agreed upon, do what makes you happy.

Interesting... what do you consider fixing and what do you consider supporting?

No he always cuts himself at work or doing something around the house, it’s an almost daily occurrence

I may be overthinking things.. but I just wanted to know others opinions.. My vet is symptomatic and I agreed to give space. The last 2 days (he only has Snapchat) his first post was “I don’t know what I would do without these clamps in my life” (referring to work) then his second one was...

I think there’s definitely a difference between him saying he doesn’t love you, and him actually meaning he doesn’t love you. What are things that he does to show you that he loves you? You can’t really take advice from people who say “it doesn’t sound like PTSD” because that’s not everyone’s...

Your story and mine go hand in hand, word for word, we live the same life. Except it’s been 4 years for us. I’m currently sleeping on my friends couch, and I’m so tired of this shit.

Mine def pushes me away for desperate need of space. At first I threatened to leave bc I’m tired of feeling lonely and being rejected lately, it’s not hard to put some effort in (for most of us). The first time leaving was even brought up, he told me “no that’s not the answer” and he didn’t want...

I think so. Today he said the bad outweighs the good, but when he’s not symptomatic he’ll tell you the opposite. That’s why I hate this. When he’s symptomatic, all rationale is thrown out the door. It’s as if everything is mirrored and he makes himself believe that everything is worse than it is...

Yes we’ll lately mine has had too many stressors so I try to be there for him, but I also have my own things going on. It gets lonely sometimes, bc he keeps busy constantly, and then either hangs in the garage to smoke, take the dog for a long walk to wind down, or he’ll spend an hour in the...

It’s amazing when we’re good. And then when it gets bad, it lingers until it gets really bad. I want to be able to pinpoint when it starts to get bad, so he can tell me he needs space.. to avoid the breaking up part. He always refers to it as “spiraling backwards”

Yes, I figured out the problem though. It was letting me post new threads or respond because earlier I was signed into my computer but now I’m on my phone... my phone was signed in as a guest, sorry for the confusion

Sounds like fight or flight to me, he’s taken off and decided to avoid the situation. It took us over 3 years (on and off relationship due to PTSD symptoms) to commit to moving in together, and I purposed dropped the idea into his mind 6 months prior, because I knew it would overwhelm him and...

I didn’t clarify, we’ve been together over 4 years now. 7 months was the period of when we got back together after a separation to symptoms occuring. That’s a good point on blaming PTSD on everything. I’m literally afraid to even say PTSD bc he gets angry and thinks it’s not an issue at all in...

Yes, I have.. I guess I’m just tired of this. When we’re good we’re good and when we’re bad, we’re not bad, we’re breaking up. Why can’t we just take some time, be mad, work through things and move on? Why is it always so dramatic... it’s to the point now that after 4 years, I literally had to...

My vet and I are on bad terms at the moment, we agreed to give space for the next few days. I told him we need to avoid breaking up and work through our problems, because we’ve been through this a few times in the past. Stress, more stress, fighting, depression, isolation, breakup, blame, time...

Hey guys, It's been a while since I've been on the site. My boyfriend and I have separated 3 times in the last 4 years, and our last separation was the longest (about 9 months), but we crossed paths (mutual friends) and sent occasional text messages. We got back together May last year and he...

It's been about a year since I've posted or even been on the site, but something told me to log-in tonight; I'm assuming it was for you. I have been with my boyfriend on and off for almost 4 years. We've been through hell and back, emotionally. During the darker periods, he blamed our...

My former counsilor who specializes in PTSD told me there is such a thing as "secondary PTSD" that can happen from supporting a partner with PTSD. I've worked in Cardiology for 5 years now.. tachycardia isn't a heart condition, it just means your heart races (normal range is 60-100 beats per...

I'm so sorry to hear all of that. It's a hard realization that we're not wanted and we can do nothing to help except to walk away. We were separated for 6 months but I don't see that as really "letting go" because we had some contact and mutual friends that brought us together. This time around...