Search results

Do you have any interaction with other transgender people, either in real life or internet? I hope there are great forums somewhere, but I wouldnt know. It is important to talk with people who share that kind of experience. Not that I want you to leave here, god no, just that this could be...

All day, every day, I feel so close to the place I want to be. I just can't get there. Like Tantalus is unable to reach the fruit and drink the water, I am incapable of reaching out to myself. I feel haunted by the person who I should have been. There is that feeling that a better version of...

Sarah Manning of Orphan Black. Latest episode. Like her, I would love to go on a drunken, irresponsible, sex fueled blender to escape the pressure . Like her, I never asked for any of this. Like her, I am sometimes haunted by a sibling who committed suicide. Like her, I feel like I am...

@Anarchy That is a one year old discussion I have completely forgotten. Either you are excessively vindictive, or it really hurt you. I have reread that thread, and do not understand why I jumped at you. Shame you did not bring it up anytime earlier, I would have apologized then as I like to do...

@Anarchy You are operating under the assumption that focusing on a people who are not you, means "posterchilding", means excluding you, means disregarding your horrible experience. It does not. It simply is reaching out to a particular demographic, one that needs reaching out to. What you feel...

Do you think a lack of entitlement can also be a issue? If, for example, someone abused does not feel entitled to a better life?

For a few months now, that is where I am at. I just am so scared that it is unhealthy that I am pretty much celibate at the moment. It sucks. For years I was okay with it, and had tons of fun and it was all around great, but then someday I became afraid its mentally unhealthy. Read too much of...

@Jessimessi It is really, really not.

Have you ever heard of "United States of Tara"? It's about a mother with DiD and its funny and heartwarming and great, but not shying away from reality. I know, this is a odd thing to recommend here, but it's a good show and basically made just for you. After the first season they even get the...

Sadness. My constant fatigue makes me very unhappy, and I wonder if I will ever get closer to my goals, or if I have to accept that I will never do. Defiance. I will hold on to my dreams for as long as I can.

Food. I lived with my abusive grandmother, and she was a great cook. Her food was the one thing that made me feel loved, and I tend to still overeat when miserable. I am getting it under controll, but it can be a big challenge. Big, ha! I am pretty sure that "consumption = happiness & love"...

They feel they do nothing wrong, even when they are doing stereotypical abusive things. What is wrong, from their point of view, is Justmehere's behavior. What is wrong, is being discovered or punished, but they? They are never wrong.

None of this is your fault. You are the victim of a creep and felon, and it seems you handled it admirably. Your therapist wouldn't lie about that. I suggest you treat yourself for a job well done! :hug:

The demons rise The haunting scenes Behind my eyes Could be The demon rises The haunting scenes Behind my iris If you want more of a rhyme :D :D :D (sorry)

That seems true! I am as confused by your point of view, as you seem to be to mine. That is super interesting. I am not feeling well at all right now, so I may only talk gibberish but I want to try. But this is also a great example. I am full of anxiety and insecurities right now, and that puts...

This is amazing.

@Justmehere I would suggest you try to not argue. I know these kind of people, and when I read you wrote "I can't recall when you ever asked how my day was." I thought "Oh, no!" People with a lack of boundaries, like the individual at hand, perceive discussion as invitation and from his point...

I have been told I can seem really happy, like for example super stoned or happy drunk, when I dissociate in a uncomfortable environment. Maybe something similar for you going on? Putting on a happy face, clown if you will, was a coping mechanism all through school for me, I suspect thats connected.

@scout86 It seems you are uncomfortable being honest to your therapist. Can therapy even work that way? I am yet to begin mine, still waiting, so Im not judging, just asking.

Your wife reminds me of me. :cautious: I was a real big jerk to my partner, just awful, and the big thing was I didn't really know until one day he broke down and cried and told me how much I have hurt him over the years. He is a ridiculously stoic person and, well, my eyes were so closed to...

This makes me uncomfortable. I need to contact admin to handle this.

Man, this sucks @Lopezwhere'sthefire . That was definitely just the most harmless of "jokes" and this backfiring like this is just ludicrous. I too would struggle handling this. What a .... joke!

Mind sharing the joke?

Jesus Christ. That movie was literally about allowing vulnerability by not pushing away sadness. I can't even .... Anyway, I don't understand your problem. Thoughts and emotions are the two things that make you you, there is nothing else to a person. If you have no access to one of those, then...

Until two years ago it was a shitton of alcohol and gigantic amounts of cigarettes. Luckily I managed to switch to vaping, which I really really love, and to Kratom. I have never felt better in my life. 17 months cigerette free, yey. In those 17 months I have drunken less then a few years ago I...