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@stenni Thanks for the story. It made me smile. I am dreading therapy on Monday afternoon and am bringing my stuffed dog, Cuddles. I don't know what else to do in case I get scared in her office again. I'd rather hug Cuddles and calm down then dissociate again. Last time dissociating was no...

I also wrote everything I needed to say down. That way I didn't have to remember anything or start the conversation on the abuse. To this day almost 13 years later I write to my therapist and psychiatrist still. I express myself better that way anyway. Best of luck to you.

A bit lost but okay. I missed my night medications again last night. So everything is a little off.

I had an okay day. I did laundry as a distraction to everything going on. It kept me busy.

I'm glad you found an outlet. I'm hear listening.

I had problems at work too and coworkers started making fun of me. I could hear the comments as they stood outside my cubicle. When I went to return to work after a long absence they seated me with the secretaries not with the other paralegals. I later found out that they had given my job...

I would be careful what you say and to whom. If they do a urine tox screen as part of the pre-employment physical then they probably will detect at the very least the clonopin. I personally wouldn't tell them about hospitalizations, suicide attempts and ECT. You might have to disclose your...

I feel lost. All the abuse from my childhood is now on the surface. I think my last therapy session triggered it. I emailed my therapist to let her know but haven't heard back yet. I haven't a clue as to what to do in the meantime other than take reallly good care of myself.

My doctor just increased me from 30 MG to 60 MG of generic Cymbalta. It is week two and I wish I had the energy I had on the name brand Cymbalta. I think it takes four weeks to fully work so maybe I'll get some energy. I cannot afford the brand name. I have no insurance. It's a struggle...

I have PTSD for a variety of reasons one of them including childhood abuse. I've never had a relationship. I'm too afraid to get close to anyone. Sex was used against me and it scares me. I haven't kissed anyone. The most I've done is flirt and it stops there. You don't specify what type...

I woke up feeling better this morning. I realize now that I cannot diet. Too much stuff from the past resurfaces. So I'm going to eat healthy and exercise more to lose weight. I cannot go through another day where the past floods in because of a diet. There is too much going on with me...

I'm thinking I need a new stuffed animal of some kind. I see a trip to Toy-r-us in my future. I'm at a point were I'm little kid scare a lot and a new stuffed animal might just be what I need.

I think you are right by getting the emotions out whether it be in letter form or in a journal. I don't use a journal because I live with my dad who would read it. So I write letters instead. If you try the journal and it doesn't work for you there are always letters. I think the point is...

I am always writing letters. But with mine I don't send them instead I tear them up. Unless it is a letter to my therapist then I give it to her most of the time. Letters are a way of getting my feelings out so that they are not bottled up inside fermenting. They are a release of guilt...

I am upset and crying. I started a diet yesterday and it brought back a lot of bad stuff. I was never diagnosed with an eating disorder but seem to have trouble with food. Now I'm counting calories which is never a good thing for me to do. Years ago in college I went below 300 calories a...

I am feeling okay but ready to cry. Feeling a little bit overwhelmed still by what I talked in therapy about. Trying to make plans to move out without even knowing what my income will be is futile. I need to be patient and await the SSI decision. Hopefully, it will be soon and favorable.

I feel anxious and tired of being yelled at. I'm reaching my breaking point with the yelling and am go to start yelling back. I don't know if that will make it better or worse.

I am feeling better than I did yesterday. I am totally grounded and hope that it lasts.

@cass84 I felt survivor's guilt for surviving 9/11 but over time and much work in therapy I don't anymore. It took years for the guilt to dissipate. I still do feel survivor's guilt over my childhood abuse. I'm working on it in therapy. Welcome to the forum.

I deserve a life of my own.

I realize that I need to move out of this house to get better than I am.

I feel confused with my future up in the air. Am I doing the right thing for me? Will I mess everything up? Then what? I'm considering going into a supportive care living situation. I don't know if I even qualify without any insurance.

I am feeling a little lost and little kid scared. I started to dissociate in a therapy session earlier until we shifted the focus away from the trigger. It's weird not to go fully into dissociation. I'm also overtired and overemotional.

I already had a diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder and PTSD when I was erroneously diagnosed with BPD at a partial hospitalization program. The BPD was diagnosed due to the them taking me off of benzos (Xanaz and clonazepam) cold turkey (very dangerous). Which seemed to enhance all of my PTSD...

I am numb. My body feels numb. I hope I'm not going to dissociate. Okay time for grounding techniques.