Understand AI use at MyPTSD: all AI use is explained in our AI help page. AI use is by choice here. It exists if you want it, but does nothing unless you choose to use it.
Thank you very much for sharing your story. It's terrible that your father forced you to watch porn when you were a child. It's very traumatic. I can understand why you took what you saw there into your imagination.
Thank you for suggesting speaking with you. At the moment I prefer to stay...
Thank you so much for your thoughtful answer. It's a deep answer.
I have to read your post and the other posts few times again
I appreciate so much that people really take their time to answer seriously. I am touched and feel supported and it’s a Hugh thing for me.
It did. I was thinking myself speaking with my T about EMDR.
We started to do exposure therapy. We are working on telling the story. At first I read the list of flashbacks. It was so difficult I thought I was going to die. And after 2 meetings she suggested that we take one memory and start to...
In the beginning I he'd only "body memories". I believe them 100%. Because I don't think that I could made this up. In the beginning I thought that it was body memories of being with my partners ( I never loved them honestly and it was only sex for me so I thought that maybe I was traumatized by...
I don't remember the abuse.
I don't remember my childhood room at all. I allwayes suspected that something happened that caused me to hide this memory of the room. But never looked for answers.
Few months ago when the flashbacks started I was sure that my big brother maybe sexually abused me...
A lot. I have convesations with my T in my head all day.
Sometimes I even fight with her in my head and sometimes I think she is the best - in my head :)
I guese its natural and it will reduce over time.
Thank you for your advice and support.
I wrote her a funny card (she has great sense of humor) and I will buy her a small flower with a pot.
Thanks!! :)
Oh and I bought myself the CD that I was considering buying her. Great music :)
I want to buy my T a gift for the holydays. and i dont know what to buy. it cant be something too personal and honestly i dont know much about her (she doesnt tell anything about herself thank god :-) ) and her room is not very personal room so i dont realy know what will she love.
i thought...
dont push yourself to cry
it will come again. usually you dont have a chalange to cry as you wrote yourself.
did you check with yourself what happened 3 weeks ago, whem you stoped crying?
i think that it's not about what is said but how he said it. Maybe if he wrote you that he heard your question and will be glad to discuss it next session, you would feel different about it? From what you wrote I felt that he was too "educational" and less empathetic. (Maybe he had a week in...
Thank you everybody for sharing your experience. It supported me very much. I understand that it takes time and I should be patient with my self ( well .. Until the next panic attack on this issue:) )
Thanks!!!
One of the things that help me believing myself is to see the effect of the abuse at all aspect of my life. And yet, sometimes I feel that my T is more shocked from "the story" than myself. It's like something that happened to someone else. Yes terrible things. I agree. But what it has to do...
I don't cry. I want to cry but I can't. Most of my life. I cry only if something dramatic happen (the death of my father for example) its so difficult not being able to cry. I understand your concern. Hope for you that that tears will come back soon when you need them.
The question is for those of you who didn't remember the abuse but started to have sudden flashbacks of the abuse.
I started to have flashbacks of abuse from my childhood few months ago. The flashbacks feel real as if thay are happening in the present moment. When I experience them I believe...
Exactly what my T said to me. "Let's work with what we have".
It helped me for a while but I still have self doubt. I believe myself only when I experience the flashbacks. But an hour later I fill self doubt again.
Thank you for your answer. I think that I understand now why I am so tired all the time. But I am afraid to let go of the resistance. If i will let go its as if I am looking for trouble in believing myself. Keeping the residence mean that I fought it and didn't want it. Crazy right?