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I imagine that many families with only some members afflicted with C-PTSD have two faces: the family that is pretty healthy, and the family members who got sick. Not one of my sibs want to define their family unit, at all, by our traumatic past. To me that is a huge false lie. It's like...

Thank God! My last T was big on recovering memories. It made me very uncomfortable. When they arise organically I feel it is my brain's way of releasing some old garbage that I am ready to face. Digging in the trash for memories is an entirely different matter. One side of C-PTSD is an...

Lewa: One of my sisters, the one who is closest in age to me has very little or nothing to do with me, and she does not believe anything's wrong with me. She believes that I just want attention and she does not believe my brother and I had it bad at all, while the other two know something was...

C-PTSD is in my opinion signficantly worse than PTSD. I am going to say something controversial: when I hear about adults who have gone through trauma and are suffering from PTSD I think I had experienced their total trauma events by about age 4. I am very proud that I am as whole as I am...

Because my trauma started from the crib and ended at 18 when I left home a lot happened to me that I don't remember. In fact, I think I remember far less about my childhood than others. Many of us have recovered memories. They come when you don't expect it, a part of your mind is unlocked and...

Good Morning to all of us who suffered greatly, and carry the burdens others gave us. We are brave, and strong, and if you are here reading this you are at least exploring a better way to live, to cope, to move ahead. How do you deal with siblings who may -- or may not -- have shared your...

It always blows my mind how we are similar. I got the urge to flee Sunday, quarreling with mate in car. Wanted to get out of the car, NOW. He wouldn't let me. I was pissed and then later thankful. I flee when I feel my security threatened, real or imagined. Happens about 3-4x/year. Such a...

When I am triggered by another person (not by a memory or other non-human element) I generally start by fighting, then when I feel hopeless I flee. Get in my car and split. I'm a wife and mother. This is bad for my kids and for my household. But when the urge to exit kicks in it's...

Me too, same thing. The result Is that I observe the world but am not quite a participant. Like looking through a window ... It's quite pleasant but distant. I'm tired of it. Methinks it's self-protective behavior even in the virtual absence of threats. I like people, places, travel, but...

I am always hesitant to pursue an enjoyable experience outside my home. Once I am out I generally am glad. But I am not good at leisure; I have worked so hard at getting to zero in my life and manage my PTSD via organization and work habits that free time is actually uncomfortable. How stupid...

Husb and I start with the fight, which used to be up to 8 days, now we are down to 1/2 day (yay!). Then recovery starts with my being catatonic for 48 hours, moving in slo mo. Lots of sleeping and my body hurts. Then I get quiet and still tired 2 more days. Day 5 is better, still fragile...

My husband and I both have PTSD and there are times when we trigger each other. When that happens we typically have a crazy fight where we both are hyper defensive, angry and the whole situation is just overcharged with emotion and anxiety. What happens is that hubby builds up fears/anxieties...

Thank you all. My sympathetic nervous system constantly fires the "fight or flight" chemicals ( noropenepherine, cortisol, adrenaline) so I always have pit of fear in my belly. The sensation is disconnected from life circumstances, so it's hard for me to assess real life victories or areas for...

I am no longer on Prozac or Ativan for almost 4 years. However, my depression is pretty stubborn. I really don't want to go back on meds because I am concerned about side effects and (especially) addiction. I have already quit alcohol, cigarettes and an eating disorder and don't want to...

Lately I have been thinking about what constitutes "healed" for PTSD sufferers. And OF COURSE we are never healed; this is a chronic illness that does not end. Will it be a combination of job + living situation + family and social situation + meds/therapies? I find this very difficult --...

You are not alone. We understand.

Dissociating scares the crap out of me because it's like being alive and dead at the same time. 'Comfortably Numb" by Pink Floyd plays in my head and I become nothing. I hate dissociating. Don't find any benefit in that state of being. It's one of the worst aspects of our chronic disease.

I am convinced that most trauma therapists actually hurt us more than heal. They have no idea that their screwing around with our psyches, unless the therapist is actually competent, makes us worse. I don't have the guts to kill myself. I dig at my flesh with my fingers until I gouge holes when...

I get it. I am a waste of space so I try and hide and be very small. Generally in fetal position in bathroom with door locked. Last night was bad. When you perceive yourself as the universe's whipping post you want to be very very small, even wishing you were negative space. Why was I put here...

You owe it to your boy to share your circumstances. He is old enough. You are actually lucky to be able to offer him advice that is real, not a well person's platitudes. Sharing your knowledge makes you an awesome, compassionate mom. He probably has your same biophysiology, this is our reality...

Goes to show that money and fame doesn't help us. RW suicide verifies how desperate we are for the pain to stop, but it never happens. I have complex PTSD, but I don't have the guts to kill myself. Nothing to live for, too chicken to end it. RW made the right call. The pain is over. This isn't a...

Sundays are so bad for me. It's like a pre-game anxiety attack all day long. Have to go back to work tomorrow. Heart pounding, adrenaline firing. Another piece of my life stolen by my abuser and his enabler.

It's never gone. Never. Hence the tragedy of having our lives stolen from us. Yes, we cope. Yes, we are mindful. I am beginning to resent how millions of silent sufferers who have spent a lifetime nibbling around society's edge, trying to fit in, are largely ignored. It took the military...

It's the "wired and tired" thing, and when it starts in the middle of the night and lasts until I collapse in bed for my uninterrupted 5 hours of sleep. Get up and do it all over again. Breathing exercises sometimes help me get back to sleep. If the adrenaline starts, at all, I cannot get...

Thank you for the support. I am realizing that what I thought were asthmatic reactions to allergies is actually related to PTSD --> anxiety --> worried I won't be heard --> close throat. Now I have it on a low-grade basis, quite a lot. My work is stressful and I have a pretty big set of...